Dear Senator - A Status Update Series

In defiance of the Implementation of R.A 10175, otherwise known as the Cyber Crime Act of 2012, I posted a series of status updates in my Facebook page. These are letters to brilliant senators of the Philippines who signed the said law. As suggested by a friend, I will compile the statuses into one easy to read entry, Enjoy, and please do tell me if I missed any one of them! Have fun guessing, too. Sandok na sang sabaw kag pataw!


Dear Senator,

Hindi naitatama ng pagpapasa ng bagong panukalang batas ang katotohanang pumirma ka nang hindi nagbabasa. Pwede ba! Bakit ipagpipilitan pang maging Senador eh mukhang mas mahal ang bayad sa pageendorso ng tuna. Please lang!

Love,

Luis na dating mahal na mahal ka

*****

Dear Senator,

Hinangaan kita nung una kang umupo dahil sa ipinakita mong kagandahan ng ugali at asal. Napakamaginoo mo noon. Bilib ako sa 'yo dahil magaling at matalino ka pa man ding abugado. Hindi ako makapaghintay na matawag kang panyero. Sabi ko, hay, may pag-asa pa ang Senado. Malaman-laman ko, pumirma ka din sa batas na ito? Anyare? Kasama ka rin yata sa 'siraan ng pangalan ng ama' society eh!

Love,

Luis na tinatry wag masira ang pangalan ng Ama

*****

Dear Senator,

Alam mo te, kaya pala hindi kita masyadong ma bet na bet eh. Hot and Cold by Katy Perry ang drama ko sa yo eh. Ate, hindi kasi eksyus na bisi-bisihan sa pagsulong ng RH Bill kung kaya nakalusot yang batas na yan eh. Unless, nakapikit ka nung pumirma ka sa panukala. O baka naman napagkamalan mong ang pinipirmahan mo ay panukala ng designer mo para sa susunod mong gown na isusuot sa kung saan mang official function mo? Isa ka rin sana sa pinapangarap kong matawag na Kumpanyera eh. Naku, pahirap ng pahirap tuloy ang maging future abugado.

Love,

Luis na kailangan talagang pumasa sa Bar

P.S: In fairness teh, ganda ng hair!

*****
Dear Senator,

At least, ikaw ang pinakaconsistent sa lahat! Sure ako na hindi ka kasapi ng 'siraan ng pangalan ng ama' society. Wala na kasing ikasisira pa further ang pangalan ng ama mo. Congratulations kasi ito naman talaga ang pinaka-pakay mo bilang Senador di ba? Ang magkalabu-labo ang bansa? Itchura ngayon ng mga nagsasabing 'Never Again!' Ang galing! You're the man po! Dahil jan, payag na ako ilibing ang tatay mo sa libingan ng mga bayani, provided, kasama ka... at syempre, dahil malulungkot ka dun, sige, pati na nanay mo. Idol kita, sobra! I love you po!

Love,

Super Fan Luis

*****

Dear Senator,

Pak na pak teh! Achieve na achieve! Thes es et! The dream is within reach! Na achieve mo na talaga ang iyong campaign slogan na "Nalintiang Pilipinas!" Ay wait, Luntian ba dapat yun? Dedma na da va? Magkatunog naman eh! Kering keri mo teh! Ngayon, wala na talagang pwedeng manlait sa yo online, at magsabing mas maganda ang gown nung asawa nung isang kongresista nung nag SONA. Ikaw na ikaw na talaga! Sintang-sinta talaga kita! You are SO! As in! By the way, may natira pa ba dun sa cellphones na pinamudbod mo? Baka naman may iPhone. Penge te para matext kita lagi ng mga papuri at pagsinta! Lab na lab kita! Ganda ganda mo as in!

Love,

Nalintian Luis

*****

Minamahal na Senador,

Iiksian ko lang to kasi mahirap isalin sa tagalog ang lahat ng gusto kong sabihin sa yo! Naku pano na yan, hindi na pwedeng gamitin ang online dictionary (hirap na hirap po akong isalin ito, pasensya na) paano ka na ngayon nyan? Sabagay, marami namang nabibiling diksyunaryo sa Recto di po ba? Mabuti at naintindihan mo lahat ng nakasaad sa panukalang batas di ba? Kaya ka pumirma? Galing galing naman ng tagasalin ninyo. Sige po, nahihirapan na po ako managalog ng dire-diretso. Pano kasi, sinira ng internet (paki-patranslate na lang itong salitang ito) ang pag-iisip ko sa mga kainglisan na yan eh! Mabuhay po kayo! Mga ten thousand years pa!

Nagmamahal,

Luis Pinoy na Pinoy

*****

Dear Senators,

I hope you don't mind na magkasabay na kayong dalawa sa iisang liham lang ha. Impressive po ang gusto ninyong mangyari kaya kayo pumirma sa batas na ito! Sabi nga po nila, one shouldn't judge a person unless he has walked a mile in his shoes! Antaray po kasi yun ang gusto nyong mangyari di ba? Ang maranasan din ng sambayanan kung paanong makulong dahil sa kanilang paniniwala at pap

aanong sikilin ang kalayaang ipahayag ang kanilang saloobin at hinanakit sa gobyerno! Napaka post-modern ng peg ninyong dalawa mga ginoo! Bet na bet ko talaga! Ngayon mararamdaman na rin namin sa wakas ang naramdaman ninyo noon. Wala namang problema di ba kasi may amnesty naman eh. Saka naiintindihan ko po kasi bahagi ito ng pagpapakita ninyo ng sinseridad sa inyong pagbabalik-loob sa gobyerno di po ba! Napaka brilliant po! Ahlavet!

Love,

Makukulong na talaga Luis

*****

Dear Senator,

Bongga ka talaga, I swear! Sayang nga lang at ang penalty ay hindi yung paliliguin sa dagat ng basura ang cyber criminal! Mas mataray yun kung nagkaganon di ba? Oo nga naman, hindi na nakapagtataka kung bakit pumirma ka dun sa batas na merong insertion sa libel provisions. Sanay ka dun di ba? Sa insertions? Sabi ni Mareng Winnie Monsod, di ba? Yung insetions, forte mo yun di ba. Bonggang bongga! True to form ka talaga! Yung kapangalan mo, nung inakusahan ng plagiarized speech nag-resign, samantalang ikaw andyan pa rin! Mas bongga ka in other words.

Love,

Hindi pa nakakapaligo sa dagat ng basura Luis

*****

Dear Senator,

Ang ganda ganda ng 'The Healing' I swear! Bet na bet ko ang acting ng asawa mo dun! Havey na havey! Dahil jan, super love na love ko talaga si Ate... na hindi ko alam kung paano ko naging ate. Anyway, ang point is, maganda ang asawa nyo! Ay sige para fair, pag-usapan naman natin ang tungkol sa inyo. Aside from this na pinirmahan nyo, bet na bet ko talaga ang Sin Tax Bill na sinusulo

ng ninyo! Ano nga ba naman ang karapatan ng mga puritang mamamayan lumaklak ng alak at humithit ng yosi? Nagki-care kayo sa health nila da va? Tayo lang! Tayo lang na Richness ang dapat maka afford magbisyo. Dava? Tapos yung sabi nyo na mas maganda ang Cash Aid ang ipamimigay kesa Condoms, tama din yun idol! Bakit ba? Brandless na Condoms ang ipamimigay? Pera na lang para makabili ng Trust or Durex or Trojan! Di ba? Duh! Maallergic pa ako sa mga libreng condoms na yan! Sobrang brilliant kayo, idol!

Love,

Vilmanian Forever Luis

P.S: I Love you, Lucky!

*****

Dear Senator,

You should have been president and this wouldn't have happened. We must take our cues from you and learn how to hide successfully and avoid detection! Surely, your signature on this bill is testament to your commitment in proving to the world the very effective and efficient police force and NBI that we have. Pormal na pormal ang letter nakakaloka! Anyway, what I really wanna say is

 that I idolize you and the things you have done for this country and so much more! I regret the fact that you have not been president, and perhaps, never will... Honestly, I am at a loss for words. I am humbled by your virtuous existence. May you live longer, whether in hiding or in the open!

Love,

Formal Theme Luis

P.S: You go, girl!

*****

Dear Senator,

Sa lahat sa kanila ikaw talaga! You're the one, Goldilocks! Kinakalimutan ko ang lahat lahat dahil sa marubdob na pag-ibig ko sa yo! Bakit ba? Kung ganyan kayummy at ka seksi, hindi na dapat kinukwestyon kung ano ang pinipirmahan mo! Dedma na! Please, Senator, sign my underwear too... ay wait, hindi pala ako nagsusuot nun! Dedma, magsusuot ako para lang may maipapapirma sa yo! Wala 

akong pakialam! Tama lang na pumirma ka sa batas na ito! Correct yun! Dedma na kung makukulong kaming lahat basta gwapo ka at yummy yun ang point dun! Yun ang pinaka qualification ng isang magaling na Senador! Oh, yes, at lineage na rin pala... apelyidong politikal! I love you so much talaga as in! Kaya kong makulong kung sa arms mo lang naman at mag stare forever sa iyong chinitong mga mata at nakakabusog na smile! I love you, Senator!

Love,

Lovestruck Luis

P.S: Kelan tatakbong senador si junakis? Promising din sya in fairness! Gwapo din kasi. Qualified na qualified for Senate!

*****

Dear Senator,

Yes! Hinding-hindi kita makakalimutan. Ikaw pa! Sa lahat ng mga pumirmang senador ikaw ang may pinaka-kabog na tatay. Buhay na buhay at magtatagal pa ng ilang siglo at sa kadahilanang ang tatay mo lang naman ang pinakamatalino sa lahat! Bigyan na yan dapat ng honoris causa na PhD si fadir! Dedma kung plunderer sya, at dedma kung ano man ang nagawa ng pamilya nyo. Look! Nananalo ka p

a rin as Senador! More Fun in the Philippines dava? Honestly, wala akong masabi talaga sa yo kasi expected naman yun na pipirma ka sa mga ganitong batas di ba? Lahat naman halos ng batas pinipirmahan mo eh. Pandagdag din yun sa iyong Curriculum Vitae di ba? Wala rin akong mahalungkat na kung anong isyung negatibo tungkol sa inyo na sobrang nakakagulantang. Or baka naman wa lang talaga akong care sa track-record ninyo. In fairness! Success ang pagbabalatkayo! In fairness na mislead nga ako sa isang film title... akala ko tungkol sa inyo... yung "The Perks of Being a Wallflower." Anyway, congrats sa pagpirma sa RA 10175! Amboring ng letter na to no? Bagay na bagay sa inyo!

Love,

Not-so-very-wall-flower Luis

*****

Dear Senator,

Pakilakasan ng volume para marinig mo ito! Ay wait, wala palang audio option ang letter. Nevermind, icoconvert ko sa audio file ito. MPEG or MP4 format... ay wait... alam mo ba yun? Nevermind ulit! Basta sobrang tama lang talaga na maisabatas na ito. Sobrang technical ang nilalaman ng batas at sa lahat ng mga Senador, ikaw ang pinakatech-savvy! Shempre! Ikaw ang pinakapreppy and yup

pie sa kanila eh. Bakit ba? Kaya lang naman hindi mo alam kung ano ang ATM Card dun sa Corona Impeachment kasi naka PayPal ka di ba? Yang nakasaksak sa tenga mo, hindi naman yan hearing aid di ba? GPS device yan with artificial intelligence na kayang idissect lahat gn sinasabi ng kausap ninyo, at mag generate ng auto response na calibrated sa lahat ng sitwasyon di ba? Jusko ang tatanga talaga ng mga Pilipino! After all, kahit ano pang sabihin nila, mananalo at mananalo ka! Forever and ever kang uupo sa pwesto no matter what! Ikaw pa! Nung naglaunch ka nga ng biography mo, friend or foe, umattend di ba? Ang hindi nila alam, Encyclopedic series yung biography na yun, right? 26 volumes yun! Sa sobrang haba pa ng itatagal mo sa mundong ito, naman di ba? I admire your intelligence talaga, pramis! Tama lang na pirmahan mo ang batas na ito, kesehodang hindi mo alam kung ano ang blog di ba? Dedma lang! GO lang ng Go! I-bottomless ang saya, Senator! Sobrang natutuwa ang smabayanan, at yun mismo ang gusto mong mangyari - gusto mo happy ako! Super happy kami! Ang saya-saya!
Mabuhay kayo! Mga six hundred seventy six thousand nine hundred fifty eight centuries more!

Love,

Super Happy Luis

*****

Dear Senator,

I have saved the best for last! YES! Ikaw na! It's your time to shine! Andami kong gustong sabihin sa inyo kaya medyo mahaba tong letter na to, pagpasensyahan nyo na po. Sobrang idol ko kasi kayo, so I can't help na marami akong gustong sabihin. Una sa lahat, FUCK YOU PO. Yun lang

Love,

Cyber Criminal Luis

P.S: Blogger LANG po ako.

Did I miss anyone? Fire away in the comments section!

Ten Sperm Things

In an article I recently read from shared links on my News Feed in Facebook, this stood out.

Read here

Let us, for a moment set aside the thought that the good Senator's words are full of crap, stupid, and bull. Let us then for a moment, put on our thinking caps and perhaps, see it the same way the Senator does. What if indeed, masturbation is interfering with the natural process of fertilization. What if indeed, it is tantamount to abortion.

Senator Enrile expressed his concern as such:

“And the question that bothers me is… Is the sperm alive? Is the ovum of the woman alive? I have consulted doctors and the answer is yes.

The sperm of a man cannot fertilize any egg, not the egg of a whale, or a lizard, or a bird, or a fish, but only the egg of a woman. And neither can the egg of a woman be fertilized by any other sperm except the sperm of a man, so that these two elements must be together to create life. But each one of them has life. There is no question about that because they have mobility: They move; they develop.”

Very noble then, is the good Senator's intention to protect the 'dignity' of this 'living' organism. As such, here are some conjectures that can normally be arrived at, granting that the sperm, indeed, is a living sentient being.

1. The sperm has feelings and emotions, thus, it is a must for it to be protected and nurtured.

Yes, dear Batchoy denizens, naturally, if the sperm is alive, it is then capable of emotions. Much like we protect plants and animals, we must also protect the sperm, as a living entity. We must make sure it is nurtured and protected.

2. The sperm then, being alive and being a 'future person,' it must be afforded legal personality.

- Never mind that the Civil Code has a different definition of legal personality and when it should be considered in existence. After all, it could easily be revised and replaced with legislative intent for the same purposes. Being a living organism, it must be given full rights. Voting rights, Civil Rights. It must be allowed to be registered and vote, it must be allowed to acquire properties, to be subject of testamentary capacity, to be able to go to school, to be able to earn a decent living, to be secure in its house, papers and personal effects. It may also be elected into office then, or appointed to government service!

3. It must be a subject of a Senate or House Inquiry in aid of legislation.

- Now that the sad state of the Sperm has come into light, it is imperative that our Senate bring an inquiry to improve the status of the Sperm, which has remained in the dark for so long a time. We must conduct extensive study and research and inquire into the sad state of the sperm before the brilliant Senator has discovered it's 'existence.' After all we should be committed to the development and welfare of the least of our brothers and sisters, and every living being! We must invite a 'spokesperm' or a 'represpermative' to shed light to this condition!

4. Associations and NGO's must be formed for the welfare of the Sperm.

- We then must come together and fight for the welfare of the sperm. It should be considered marginalized and hence, we should do our part in protecting the sperm from abuses. We must form associations and People's Organizations for the welfare of the sperm!

5. It should organize, together with other sperm, under one banner, and run for office as a marginalized group under the party list system.

- It is provided for under the party list system, that representation is afforded to the marginalized sector of society, and as such, the sperm and their kind should also be afforded with the same privilege! VOTE FOR SPERM in the next elections!

6. It must have its own religion.

- If it is alive and is to be a future person in itself, then it must care for its soul, and as such, it must have a faith of it's own. Preferably, Catholic!

Further in the debate for the RH Bill, the good Senator also said:

“Well, if the man wants to satisfy himself by manipulating himself alone, if it is only for pleasure, then it interferes with the production of life. That is my belief. That is a matter of faith to me.”

Therefore -

7. Everything that is a matter of faith for a member of the Senate should be given high credence.

- Never mind the doctrine of separation of Church and State! If the Senator feels like legalizing cannibalism, then it should be, because it is a matter of faith! Speaking of cannibalism;

8. Since the sperm is a living entity, the swallowing of it in any form, sexual or otherwise, is considered cannibalism.

-So too is the 'interfering' with the production of life when a woman ovulates every month and has her discharges. It interfered with the meeting of the sperm and the egg and the ovulating woman should be charged accordingly for preventing or failing to cause the production of life. Hence, it should be a law that every egg should be fertilized to produce life, and the ovulating woman should do everything to cause such a union!

9. Therefore, the sperm should be a subject of a UN Convention!

- Knowing now that the sperm is a living organism, it should not only be protected locally, but should be a subject of International importance, hence a summit should be called, and a protocol or a UN Convention on the protection of the same should be pushed. NOW!

And lastly!

10. For purposes of gender equality, the same matters should be undertaken for the egg cells!

- Of course, the feminine counterpart must be equally protected!

Ain't that brilliant? Now, please, give the good Senator an Honoris Causa Degree in Medicine and Theology!

Here is the brilliant Senator! Champion of the Sperm's cause!

ONE SPERM!

Images Courtesy of Google Images

Taralerj!

Duh! Kumusta naman ang Department of Tourism ng bansa? After launching, or rather attempting to launch the controversial new slogan "Pilipinas Kay Ganda!" which earned a lot of flak from the public and was highly criticized, they pull it off saying it was just on 'test-run.' Well it seems they are gonna bomb out once more. Here is the alleged new 'concept' for the new slogan.

Sabi ng Secretary of Tourism eh sa local tourists daw naka target ang bagong slogan. Nakikita daw nila na dapat palakasin ang domestic tourism at hikayatin pa sila na maglagalag sa buong bansa.




KUMUSTA KA NAMAN TEH?

How elementary could you get? How frustrating!

Una: Why do they insist, in the first place to replace the existing and very successful WOW Philippines campaign? Bakit kailangan palitan samantalang napaka successful nitey at malakas ang dating at recall value?

Pangalawa: Why do they insist on adopting a Tagalog/Filipino slogan? Rasunan pa na domestic ang target teh? Well, kung ganon nga, eh di ba mas epektib ata kung ang kampanya instead of Tara Na! Gawin na lang "WER NA U, HIR NA ME!" di ba? Mas simple, naiintindihan, masa direkta at mas epektibo? WER NA U, HIR NA ME sa DINAGYANG FESTIVAL ILOILO oh dava!

Pangatlo: Kumusta naman ang poster teh? Mas magaling pa yata ang pamangkin ko gumawa ng poster noh! At ang tatlong bata, I'm sure tatawagin nilang sina Luz, Vie, at Min. Wanabet?

Hay naku, kaloka lang. Sa panahon ng digital technological advancements, ito na yun? Ito na talaga teh? Kalurkeibelles! Yun nah!

Epic F

And while at it, elsewhere in the lofty halls of Senate, another 'oh so brilliant I am dazed and dazzled' Senator has this to say.



Senate Bill 2639, authored by the highly intelligent Senator Lito Lapid, seeks to regulate and mandate that Billboards be either in English or Filipino only. If it be in a foreign language, it should contain the English or Filipino Translation. He says that signs in other languages 'alienate' the Filipinos. The Senator added, "It is incumbent upon the State to instill and maintain a sense of nationalism among dwellers... We, as Filipinos, should never be subjected to the alienation and seclusion that we are experiencing due to this phenomenon."

Brilliant, right? Now let's start at Binondo and Ongpin, where there is a proliferation of strange calligraphic signs. We don't know that the sign means 'restaurant' right? Or that it means 'internet cafe,' right? Oh and we are sooo alienated! Thank you so much, Senator!

Photo Credits:

http://www.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://www.pinoy-ofw.com/news/wp-content/uploads/2010/11/lito-lapid.jpg&imgrefurl=http://www.pinoy-ofw.com/news/4357-senator-lito-lapid-seeks-50-postal-discount-ofw-families.html&usg=__XDw8Eo-zjAomVM8AU18TO2u9IZQ=&h=320&w=229&sz=16&hl=en&start=4&sig2=dSdq2L5rrQgG-xTKtULWcw&zoom=1&tbnid=TU_zvihNAUaW-M:&tbnh=118&tbnw=84&ei=H6E6TbDMJYK8cJ-P0IUH&prev=/images%3Fq%3Dlito%2Blapid%26hl%3Den%26biw%3D1280%26bih%3D579%26gbv%3D2%26tbs%3Disch:1&itbs=1

Winner si Tiyay

Winner si Tiya'y ko Mirring Lukring

Seeking to ammend Article 248 of the Revised Penal Code, Senate Bill 455 seeks to include all Digital MEdia Practitioners in the Protection afforded by the law.




“With the popularity of blogs and video-sharing websites such as YouTube, there are now a lot of people who regularly post sensitive political commentaries online, with content similar to those traditionally published in newspapers or broadcasted over the television. It is clear that practitioners of the digital media are exposed to the same dangers that print and broadcast media practitioners are exposed to, so they should likewise be given protection by the law,” she said.



Winner ka gid ya Chay! It's only a matter of time, that what I once proposed in this blog become a reality too. The revisiting of other National Laws to include the virtual community online, such as the revising of the Omnibus Elections Code, to include the reality and impact of the cyber community in our political exercise. Mabuhay ka Tiya'y!


Read the downloadable copy of the Bill HERE

Photo Credits:

http://www.coolbuster.net/2011/01/senate-bill-455.html

Unfriended

Election Day, May 10, 2010...

"Today, watch me unleash my
power! Unleash yours too... Mabuhay ang Pilipinas! Oh, and by the way,
you PR machines who plan to text me one final message for your
candidates, be warned! It is supposed to be off-campaign and it is a
violation of the Omnibus Election Code and I am serious about reporting
these! Be warned!"

That was how I started my day... by posting the said status in my Facebook Page. To be very honest, it is quite irritating to see how this is true on the very day of the elections. Clearly it does not take much to put two and two together.

Minutes later, I was scanning through the posts I missed and I was doubly pissed. There was a proliferation of very fresh last minute tags and posts with campaign nature. So I changed my status immediately...

That is exactly why we do not progress as a country. Either you are hard headed or simply stupid. It is election day and people still post and tag campaign stuff. I am ashamed to call most of them my friends! YES I MEAN YOU! IDIOT!

I Changed my mind minutes later and softened it a bit to...

That is exactly why we do not progress as a country. Either you are hard headed or simply stupid. It is election day and people still post and tag campaign stuff. I am ashamed to call most of them my friends! YES I MEAN YOU(in plural form)! IDIOT!

As I sifted through the posts, I carefully commented on each post that appears as a campaign of sorts with a very polite note...

Gentle reminder... Today is already election day and it is off-campaign... there may be a violation of the Omnibus Election Code... peace out and have a great day!

Seconds later, most friends either made dedma, made palusot or rectified and apologized thanking me kindly for the reminder... but not for someone...

He sent me a fiery email berating me. Pointing out that first, Social networking sites are not part of the real world covered by the Omnibus Election Code and the proviso on electioneering, stating that it is a personal page. Secondly, that its none of my fucking business what he does in his wall and I can choose to hide them or as he has done, unfriend me and that lastly I too was violating social networking rules by not posting my real name and had double standards.

To which I was a taken aback. Knowing this friend I never expected him to react with such vehement violence. I had high regards and respects for him and consider him a prime intellectual that the reaction was really a shocker coming from him. I calmly replied that it seemed kinda harsh but I respect his reaction and decision, and that although it may not be my real name, but this is my recognized pen name as a writer and is being used by me even when I won an international award, so it is not entirely a false or assumed name. I thank him for personally sending me an email and apologized for whatever ills he might have felt. He then responded that he was 'bastosed' that I had to post a comment on his wall, and it would be better this way because now I would not see his annoying posts and could have called me out on my wall too, but did not do so for lack of tact. I again replied, apologized, thanked him and said that it would have been better if he called me out so I can see my flaws and rectify them. I ended by a sincere apology before the nicks become a deep dent. He did not reply.

Thinking that my status message could really have been too strong, I rephrased it.

That is exactly why we do not progress as a country. Either you are hard headed or simply
stupid. It is election day and people still post and tag campaign
stuff. I am ashamed to call most of them my friends! Then again, that's why we are friends because we can gently remind them and not be taken in ill favor.

I did not even try to point out to him the fallacy of his reasoning. I just apologized and repeatedly said that if it has to come to this, I understand and respect his decision.

Later, I gave up on reminding my friends, no matter how the taggoing and posting continued to proliferate. I started to notice something. All these taggings and posting come from or a majority so to speak, came from supporters of the color of the grasses. That's as far as my page news and history is concerned at least. Somehow I'm happy that my color was silent and did follow the rules, again, from my page nes at least.

It saddened me to think that, just like that, I lost a friend. It saddened me that for all the respect and high regard I had for him, he turned out to be immature and bordered on fanaticism. And so, I relized three things:

One: It is hard to be vigilant and good. You're motives are always in question even if you know in your heart that your only purpose is to be a vanguard of the electoral process.

Two: That we need to redefine, refurbish and make adaptive the laws, in particular, the Omnibus Election Code to reflect the reality of the use of tri-media, such as social networking sites and the like in relation to prohibitions under the law. While it is true that "Nullum crimen, nulla poena sine legis"... there is no crime if there is no law that punishes it, it doesn't take a genius to know that really, these are not merely personal blogs, but also a modern convention that needs to be considered.

And lastly, you can never expect the Spanish Inquisition.

With these said, I wonder how my now unfriended friend would do if -

My presidential candidate wins, he would probably flood the site with conspiracy theories and sad tales of woes and 'dayaan.'

If they win, he will gloat and be encouraged to do the same things again, even if apparently, it is not necessarily right.

Oh well... the toll of being vigilant and social/civic responsibility and responsiveness... I might have lost a friend, but deep inside, I knew I did what I can to make a stand and make a difference and with God's will, I will gain a truly good government under good honest leaders with integrity!

May bilog, may bilog

I have been really thinking about my choice for president for a very long time. Politics is really not my favorite topic, and when asked, I usually reply with 'pinagiisipan ko pa.' Honestly, I was thinking that I will just let the elections pass and say nothing of my choice in my blog. After reading a lot, researching a lot, weighing things a lot and actually praying a lot, I have made my decision. I have chosen my color.

Admittedly, it was a difficult decision and I must say it pays to wait a while to see how people change styles and show their true colors when subjected to extreme pressures. It also afforded me the chance to listen to other people and see if their logic is sound. I also enjoyed exchanging views with my friends on this topic.

This is just my second time to vote for a president. Sadly, at this point, no one has readily won my heart the way Sen. Miriam Defensor Santiago did (although I was not able to vote yet at that time she ran for President) or the late Sen. Raul Roco. I am tempted to simply say why I chose whom I chose but that won't be interesting would it?



My early favorite was Gordon, because of his sterling track record and admirable performance. Then I also liked Nicky Perlas, but this brilliant person whose answers are most impressive just does not have what it takes to be President, sadly, after the fact. Then there's the brilliant Gibo Teodoro who also impressed me with very practical solutions and very solid answers. As for Jamby Madrigal, I am sorry but she is just really really a wild card thing, second only to JC De los Reyes. As for the ex-president Joseph Estrada, well, please do not insult my intellect... pwede ba? Eddie Villanueva for president is another insult on my intelligence. The separation of church and state is a concept that is clear to me even before I entered law school. As for Villar, I have never voted for him ever. Not for Senator, and definitely not for President. With Noynoy Aquino, I too have my misgivings about him. It is as if we are left with a choice between the devil and the deep blue sea. Sadly, my choice is to choose the least evil, so to speak.

After listening to a lot of public forums, a lot of debates, a lot of 'conspiarcy theories', after researching a lot and weighing the pros and the cons, and of course, praying a lot, I have made a decision. It seems that I am yellow!

One of the process I had to go through was to weight the candidates against the negative issues hurled against them and the final straw that proverbially broke the Camel's back is as follows:




Villar: Listening to Prof. Winnie Monsod, who, to start with is someone I admire a lot really convinced me that there were insertions and Villar is guilty with the C5 controversy, but what really broke my heart is Nanay Curing's being used for sad and pathetic emotional campaign. The words of the sister rings loud and clear... "Bakit, nangagamit din naman sila ng nanay ah! Patay na nga eh, ginagamit pa!" I hear you sister... ginagamit nyo nga ang nanay nyo! SHAME!

Gibo: I really did not fall for the Villaroyo sympathy thing and the resignation from Lakas. I see it as a last ditch effort to shake away the shadow of the malignant cancer that is Gloria besetting his candidacy. Tactics, tactics, tactics. So if it is to be believed that Arroyo has left him supportless because she now roots for Villar, they would have removed that one obstacle that hinders his shooting up to the top. Tsk tsk tsk... Sayang, I really like you but I can not get past Gloria's annoinment of you. It's a classic... the 'mother-in-law' problem, right, hon? Chos!

Gordon: The last straw was the 'sue the SWS' thing! It proves the rumors for me that he is a big wimpy kid throwing tantrums when he does not get his way... well... the scary human rights violation in Subic also kinda put me on guard.

Perlas: I just hope you get appointed to a cabinet position. You, sir, are brilliant. Its just not enough. You have failed to capture my trust and confidence.

JC: Why the top spot all of a sudden sir?

Jamby: She is really really cute, like a Pokemon and that's it.

Bro. Eddie: I hold fast to my opinion that a refusal to see the simple truth that there must be a separation of Church and State is plain stupidity, and you being a religious leader is just a turn off. Stay with your flock, sir.

Erap: Oh phuleeze! As I have mentioned above... do not insult my intelligence!



SO that obviously leaves us with Noynoy. Actually, when I kinda latched on to the idea of voting for him, I told my friends that my very biased feeling is that I am choosing him because he is the least among the evils. I felt that should things not go very well, he is the one most easy to make accountable for. If worse comes to worst, he is the easiest to demand accountability from. He has not much to hide behind, unlike Villar with his money and Gibo with his military. Of course I had to grapple with issues against him the top three of which follows.

Hacienda Luisita - I believe he is not simply washing his hands when he said that he owns merely shares. I believe him. HE does not run the show entirely. Why put the blame entirely on him? The yellow ribbon with blood splatters is simply too melodramatic for me. Besides, there is a case already filed in the proper courts, and the presumption of innocence until proven guilty is a sound and necessary facet in a democratic country and in a good justice system. There is no direct link that convinces me of his direct and clear accountability for the Hacienda Luisita issue.

No Legislative Track Record - Did Fidel Ramos have one prior to his presidency? Did Cory Aquino have one? I do not think so. Besides, I am sick and tired of all these political grandstanding and all these inane hearings 'in aid of legislation!' There are a thousand and one useless and inutile laws in the country. We do not need more laws and count bills passed into law. We need substantial implementation. This issue has failed to turn me off.

MAma Papa Legacy - Sister Villar mouthed it. Sino ba ang hindi gumagamit ng nanay? In the political arena, who is not guilty of using, in one way or another, pedigree and lineage? One thing has convinced me that Noynoy is NOT a mere 'legacy rider' - His stand on the RH Bill. Tita Cory has been a known woman of the faith, particularly the catholic faith, and surely would be one with the church's stand. It is refreshing for me to hear him damn the clergy and not care whether they support him or not because of his strong stand on the RH Bill issue. It shows that he is not entirely just a 'mama's bot' and is capable to be his own man!

So yes, I am YELLOW. Though I am not Marian Rivera who is a Psychology, I am Yellow simply because he has the Integrity and I believe in the promise that he represents.

As for my Vice President, I go for Mar. He has the credentials, the political will and the clout to boot. In fact, before he retreated to give way for Noynoy, he already had my nod. I respected him more and got impressed by this selfless act in fact.

As to my Senators, I again will not be able to complete all the slots. I ahev always believed that if I only have three senators, at least I have full trust and full faith in them, so I guess such will be the case this year.

Here are my choices.

- Miriam Defensor Santiago - kailangan pa bang imemorize to?
- Liza Maza - She has my heart
- Kata Inocencio - mukhang brilliant naman, masubukan
- Sergio Osmena III - naiimpress pa ako sa kanya at feel ko kapakipakinabang sya

under consideration:
- Satur Ocampo
- Sonia Roco
- Regalado Maambong
- Jun Lozada

PARYLIST
- Ang Ladlad - for very obvious reasons!

I would have completed my list with my choices for local positions in Iloilo City where I am registered but that would make this already long post even longer. For now, I am letting everyone at large know that I am happy to be Yellow. The more I say it the stronger I feel right about it.

Color me Yellow!


Photo Credits:

philippinesfunwall.wordpress.com
kapehanonline.wordpress.com
sifranzaypinoy.wordpress.com
http://s612.photobucket.com/albums/tt205/Kaya123LOVE/Colour%20Splash/?action=view&current=crayons.jpg&newest=1

Foulitikia Atbp.

At dahil umabsent ako ng bongga, babawi din ako ng bongga!

Dobol feature... parang sine lang. And let me do something I rarely do. Write about foulintikss!

Goodtaym lang to... parang dear ate charo lang...

Parang short note...

Parang...

Letche... ganito yun!


Here are some things for the people running for the ringmaster in this circus of a government that we have. Let me start.

Dear...

Noynoy -

"I Swear it's this BIG! - My lamang in the surveys"

Your mother is the universal tita, so that makes you insan, but that's not my point. What I really like to say is that, win or lose, let insan Krissy take care of recovering your campaign losses: with your penchant for turbocharged answers in public forums and such, you'd be perfect as the Energizer Bunny incarnate! My suggestion is for you to stage a grand last minute wedding. Do a Korina-Mar, insan. Just don't marry Shalani in FAO Schwarz or Toy Kingdom.




Manny -

Take the plunge

Brilliant ads! Catchy Jingle! Love the 'back-mask' thinggie ad! Dear, you have a brilliant media whiz at work! Introduce to us the head of your creative team! We'd love to vote him/her for President! Oh, but I'm sure we would know him/her if you win because for sure, you'd be a fool not to appoint him as Press Secretary! Oh the lovely magical realist tales he/she would spin for you! Suggestion - consider taking acting workshops. They could do more wonders.




Dick -

Iron Dick... errr Iron Chef Dick

What's in a name they say? Everything. Parents should pay close attention to naming their children because a Rose, by any name, is a florist's marketing strategy. Well, if it's true that we are what our names are, I was just wondering... are you really that? A big.... well... Richard? Suggestion - keep Mr. Fernando closer, consider spandex, and highlight your other moniker - the flash?



Brother Eddie -

Neozep lang yan... babangon ka agad!

Putting aside the clear clause of separation of church and state, let me say you are wonderful. When I hear you bare your plans for the country, I await with bated breathe, for you to punctuate your discussion about the economy with a biblical verse and a proposition to change the peso to shekels. The other brother has it bad and he's just endorsing a party-list, you know. The Philippine constitution is verbose and the laws of the land are voluminous. The commandments you know are only ten. Oh and if your vice-president cannot even win the presidency of a school board here in Iloilo, then what chances have you two got as a tandem?Suggestion - try to up the ante with an impassioned fire and brimstone, hand wringing, gut wrenching hair tearing, ash smothering, sackcloth wearing mourning for the state of the Philippine Government... Careful with that ark though. Oh, and learn from Mister Escudero his delectable way with the Tagalog speaking thinggie.



Gibo -

Now wear it properly. As it is without clothes inside!

Hey baby... I mean panyero... Chos! You are really brilliant and all. I love the way you sound so layman considering you are a bar top-notcher even when explaining highly technical points. I like that a lot. I like your points. Very succinct - promising indeed. More or less, I agree with your thoughts and your plan of action. I like you a lot its almost a lot like love. However... I think its a misjoinder of parties darling. Wrong political side, wrong affiliation, wrong vice-president, wrong anointment, wrong ogre godmother. WRONG! If this was the Bar exams, you, my dear, are an elaborate essay answer with distinguishing and jurisprudence worthy of full marks - but to a multiple-choice question. Suggestion - Make them fall truly madly deeply in love with you. After all, when love is involved, it makes something so wrong feel so right, says Toni Gonzaga, and when you throw in the word love, you get away with almost everything. Ask Santa Evita!




Nicky-

Alien? Raise the roof!

Oh Nicky you're so fine, you're so fine you blow my mind, however, not everyone enjoys listening to a political speech and platform which is the equivalent of a scientific name, or a lecture in the measures of central tendencies. Something is lost in translation dear Nicky, and it's you. Darling it's just so wrong. Suggestion - have you considered how many saplings could have been bought and reforested with the campaign money you poured into this fray?


JC -

Holding it... I mean Holding On to the fight!

So young, so dynamic, so chivalric. With a knighthood from members of the Vatican in the Philippines, it is just plain romantic saga of a young idealistic warrior. So very very -next time na lang ok? The priests who loves you so much can't be blamed. You are the very image of a responsible sakristan-mayor, or a knight of Columbus, or Adoracion Nocturna even. Too bad, Tubid is already the model for Blessed Pedro Calunsod. Suggestion - to speed up the process, pour yourself into research for obscure Filipino Martyrs for the faith. Surely, you would be a very good model for the next Filipino Saint. Make sure though that the person you will help towards canonization is not some Carmelite Nun ok?





Erap -

Ahmmm

There is a big difference between executive clemency and acquittal, sir. You flaunt that your being pardoned proves your innocence. Exoneration of a crime, commutation of sentence or absolute pardon is not the same as being found not guilty. You would understand what I am saying wouldn't you? I think you are very misunderstood, and hence, I do not understand you. Oh and I love your campaign colors. It reminds me of where you are supposed to be. Don't worry, we are far from adopting that black and white striped get-up. Suggestion - Try this mantra: When I grow up, I wanna be like Winnie Monsod!


Jamby -

Jessa? IZATCHU?

Honey, I have saved the best for last. Like you, I do not know how much a kilo of galunggong is. Like you, I too am not into 'itlog na pula,' make mine Century Eggs please. I think you are the best. The very fact that your campaign platform is very solid and singular is a big decisive factor for me - GET MANNY VILLAR! Atta gurl! Suggestion - Psstttt... your then political endorser is also an endorser for a slimming product with L-Carnitine. It's a good addition to the already impressive CV that you have of being a Vegetarian. Maybe she could give you the tips and tricks. However, you did say that you have turned your back when you saw the folly of your ways right? I just hope that when you do, your dress has full beaded design and not the flesh-flash -less thing, mmmkay? If you find it harder to see the folly or your ways this time, don't worry. We are not in a hurry. Meanwhile, you can window shop at a local wet market. Of course you can stay inside your car and look at things through the window. That's why it's called window shopping, right?

Whew! Now if I must say - this is all y0ur fault Chiz! You left me in pain, confusion and suffering, after all I have shown you - after all my love and devotion to you! ETCHOS!
Make that ETCHIZ!


Photo Credits:

philippinesfunwall.wordpress.com
citadel.seitoukai.net/2010/01/24...r-spoof/
www.newsflash.org/2004/02/tl/tl0...2403.htm
www.freemediabuzz.com/Posible-Pa...wala-Ka/
karitoon.com/xoops/modules/extga...d%3D1161
ewsinfo.inquirer.net/inquirerhe...esidency
john-carlos-de-los-reyes.politic...os-reyes
wawam.wordpress.com/2009/11/30/p...lection/
ifemoto.blogspot.com/2010/01/ph...07375755

Color Coding

Flaxshet!

I have a world shattering problem. Sobrang bigat at hirap at kumplikado I swear.


I'm in a dilemma! There is this ka eklatan in the office tomorrow. In celebration of the supposed to be non-existent Valentine's Day, there was a memo. Tomorrow, February 12,2010, everyone should be dressed in color codes reflective of their romantic status. No exceptions.

RED If you are in a Relationship, Married, or simply in love

Green if you are single and searching/looking.

Yellow if it's complicated

MEGA KNOWN? May paganun ganun na prime factorization chuvanells?

Well...Now what?

I wanna wear red, because really, I'm in a relationship. A good one! With my whole gorgeous self! It's still a relationship right? Also, I'm married to my passions and convictions. I'm literature's blushing groom, and yes, I am perpetually in love! Im in love with life, with words, with coffee, and the world is, after all its shittiness, a deeper shade of scarlet! So, yes, I'm a red!

I should wear green, because, yes, I am single, individually exceptional, and yes, I am searching, looking, waiting, wishing and hoping all rolled into one! Add to that, bitching, whinning, and sometimes, 'tantruming.' Besides, it suits me, green is just so 'bitter ocampo.'

And yellow, yes, it is complicated. I am a complex individual. Its complicated because it simply is. NUBAYAHN!

Wait lang.. parang ganito yata to eh...

Red as in Red Cross Dick Gordon




Green as in Green Team Gibo Teodoro





Yellow as in atay a yelo ribbon Noynoy Aquino

Honestly, wala pa rin akng mapipisil sa mga presidentiables na mga to. Simple lang. wala ni isa sa kanila ang merong solid platform tungkol sa usapin sa Sining at Kultura. Actually, dati nung si Toto Mar pa ang kumakandidato, naroon ako sa isa sa mga porum nya sa Iloilo for early harvests at bigla naman ako na turn off nung hindi nya masagot ang tanong ko kung ano meron sa plataporma nya tungkol sa literatura, kultura at sining. Maybe it's not a pressing concern, but then again, it has been most neglected. A solid leader needs to have all bases covered and since none of them has a solid national platform for culture and the arts, medyo wala pang tumitibang ng gaano sa puso ng batchoy boi. I am not asking for a Marie Antoinette, who, when told that the people no longer had bread to eat responded with a suplahdah 'then let them eat cake.' Gusto ko lang na meron syang magandang plataporma for culture and the arts. Yun lang naman.

Now... what to wear?

This?



This

Or This?




Arghhh... Mag absent kaya ako? Tara... gala tayo bukas? hehehehe

Photo Credits:

http://www.city-data.com/forum/photography/416288-seeing-red-6.html
http://www.greendrainagesolutions.co.uk/tips.html
http://photography.nationalgeographic.com/photography/enlarge/yellow-umbrella-photography.html
http://chuvachienes.com/2009/03/12/the-list-of-presidentiables-2010-philippines/
http://halalan2010campaign.blogspot.com/2009_11_01_archive.html
http://filipinoscribbles.wordpress.com/2009/08/
http://weddingdimension.files.wordpress.com/2008/07/red-dress.jpg
http://www.splendicity.com/articles/calvin-klein-jade-halter-gown-400/
http://www.pursepage.com/chanel-handbags/paris-hiltons-chanel-clutch-2.html