This is quite possibly the best thing ever. Ever.

We pause in our interminable Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles coverage to spread the word about this delectable-ness:

BACON S'MORES

I just read about this, which falls squarely in the "why the hell didn't I think of this years ago?" category, on NPR this morning.  It is just one more example of how bacon makes everything better: you take your regular ol' s'mores* - toasted marshmallow on slab of chocolate on graham crackers - and add some crispy bacon in there, probably between the marshmallow and the chocolate.  That is completely brilliant and I am totally doing this on our next camping trip.

*  NPR linked to this site here, which got all fancy-pants with homemade pig-shaped graham crackers.  That might be a little too Martha Stewart for yours truly but the little pig-shaped s'mores are about the cutest things you've ever seen.

Photo credit: NPR.  Oh gawd those look fabulous, even for indoor s'mores.

Deep-fried chocolate-covered bacon on a stick: FAIL

Mr. Mouse and I went to the Utah State Fair recently, and while I'm not going to repeat the blog post about the fair that I did over there at my other blog, I will say that I was SORELY DISAPPOINTED with the deep-fried chocolate-covered bacon on a stick.  Which, as you all well know, is in theory the Friend Mouse Holy Grail of bacon-centric foods. 

Imagine, if you will, as I did: crisp bacon, dunked in chocolate, battered and deep-fried to golden goodness.  Or even crisp bacon, battered and deep-fried to golden goodness and then drizzled in chocolate.  It could have been SO fabulous, glistening alongside the deep-fried Twinkies, deep-fried Snickers bars, deep-fried Oreos and deep-fried peanut butter and jelly sandwiches.

 But no.  Sadly, this is what I got for my $4.50:  a strip of bacon, threaded onto a wooden skewer and deep-fried, then plopped in a cardboard basket and spritzed with thin chocolate sauce.  That was it.  Fer chrissakes, I could do that myself at home.  Should have gone with the deep-fried Snickers - and next time I will.

Don't believe the hype

Bacon al fresco

It's been far too long since my last bacon post, I realize.  I don't have any new products or links or restaurant encounters for you, but what I do have is my recent epiphany.

This is how you cook bacon when it's 94 degrees out:

I don't know why I didn't do this before (well, mostly because I never had a grill with a side burner before, but still) because it's genius.  The house doesn't smell like bacon for the next three days; the dog licks up any stray bacon grease splatters on the deck; and I get to be outside with a cocktail.  Brilliant.

The whole reason I was needing to fry bacon - other than, duh, wanting some - was that I was trying out a new recipe for a homemade, non-processed energy bar to take with us on all the hikes we've been doing.  Store-bought granola bars and energy bars can be too sweet and I had seen something on television during the Tour de France where the Radio Shack team's nutritionist whipped this up.  It's cooked sushi rice, a couple of scrambled eggs and bacon mixed together with a little soy sauce, balsamic vinegar and grated Parmesan cheese.  Pack it down into a pan, sprinkle a little brown sugar on top.  Let cool then cut into bar sizes and wrap in foil paper. 

Mr. Mouse and I tried them on our hike today.  Pretty good, although I might go with less soy sauce and more brown sugar next time.  Still, if it's good enough for the RS boys to eat, it's good enough for us.  Plus, bacon!

All of my favorite things

My dear friend Blonde Ambition knows me too well.  She sent me a Christmas present (even tho' she shouldn't have because we were cutting back and not sending Christmas presents this year) that combined all of my favorite things:  chocolate, beer and bacon.  Let me repeat that for you: chocolate and beer and bacon, all together.

From the charming chocolatier, Socola Chocolates (just look at their website without drooling, I dare you), came a gorgeous box of twelve truffles entitled the Beer and Bacon collection: six Guinness-infused dark chocolate tidbits, and six "Notorious H.O.G." nibbles.  The bacon truffles were also dark chocolate, embedded with bits of applewood-smoked bacon and garnished with black Hawaiian sea salt.  The Guinness truffles were just ravishing, smooth and creamy with just a bit of bitterness from the beer.  The bacon truffles had the best mouth-feel when allowed to melt whole in your mouth - as opposed to taking a bite out of the candy - as that way the little bacon bits didn't get lost.  The Hawaiian sea salt is a miraculous addition - an excellent counterpoint to the richness of the chocolate.

I opened the box a couple of days before Christmas and finished the last truffle last night, taking my time to savor each individual morsel.  These are really good chocolates.  And Socola (which uses the most adorable mascot: Harriet the flying alpaca!) has a whole bunch of other truffle varieties that sound just as amazing: Calmyrna fig, Earl Grey tea, burnt caramel, guava, Vietnamese espresso, jasmine tea, green tea, dark chocolate champagne ... now I'm drooling!

The company is run by two sisters, Wendy and Susan Lieu, and can be bought in person in several locations in San Francisco/Oakland.  Or order some online - I promise you won't regret it.

Don't abandon all hope, ye who enter here

As I mentioned here, the arrival of the in-laws is imminent and posting will be even lighter than it's been. If that's at all possible - jeesh, FM, you have gotten Lame.  But I'm promising good things to come: I've read the next Sandman volume; and since I now have a job, I've reinstated my Blockbuster.com account and have a DVD poised and ready.  It'll be Monster Squad all around ... just as soon as I can get Mr. Mouse to help me hook up the DVD player.

In the meantime, Bacon Today has a post about something that combines two of my very favorite things: bacon and alcohol.  At the Anchor Bar in Superior, Wisconsin, they're serving up the Pancake Breakfast Shot, "a shot of alcohol that tastes like a plate of syrupy pancakes with a side of bacon."  The recipe sounds a little sweet - 1/2 shot butterscotch liquer, 1/2 shot strawberry schnappes, strip of crispy bacon to soak; served chilled or room temperature - and if I were to try it at home, I think I might go with a fruit-flavored vodka instead of the schnappes.  The Bacon Today reviewer called it a winner and I'm thinking it might be a nice addition to a Sunday brunch sort of meal.

And over at the Candy Dish Blog, there's a post entitled "Is Bacon Pushing Chocolate Aside?" that's interesting (it says that no, of course not, there's room for both!) and has links to an NPR article about bacon in desserts that includes some dandy-sounding recipes (candy, cake, cookies and fudge).  Click through and check them out!

It goes with everything!

Remember our old friend, Bacon Salt, from J&D's?  Well apparently the company is doing EXTREMELY well (even in these trying times) due to the success of their Bacon Salt products and subsequent Baconnaise, and they've put out several new products since I visited their site last.  Now, here's the disclaimer: I haven't tried ANY of these three products but criminy, it's all bacon-flavored, so how bad could it be?

Bacon Pop - bacon-flavored microwave popcorn.  I'm tempted to give this a whirl, even knowing how stenchy regular microwave popcorn can be.  Perhaps a nice compromise would be to pop some popcorn the old-fashioned way - I have an air popper circa 1987 in storage somewhere - coat it with melted butter and pour on the Bacon Salt.  At least they're not hawking bacon-flavored soda, which is what I feared when I read "bacon pop."

Bacon Ranch - is bacony ranch dressing.  Sounds good - I would dip french fries into it as well as slathering my salad.  (And easy to do at home by dumping a jar of real bacon bits into bottled ranch salad dressing ...)

Mmmvelopes - and this is what made me start the post in the first place: they've taken envelopes and added bacon flavor to the stickum you lick to seal the flap.  This, to me, is way more genius than the bacon dental floss and bacon breath mints I suffered tested for you earlier.  Of course, no one sends actual paper letters anymore so this is clearly a novelty among novelties.  The name is super-cute tho'.

P.S. - My webbuddy Reel Whore had a recent excellent bacon experience of his own - I'm so very envious.

Maple Bacon Gelato

A trip to the dentist was on my long list of things to get done before the great SLC departure; my dentist's office is not too far from where my folks live so my mom and I met for coffee and catching-up first. She suggested the Bohemian Coffee House which has apparently been around a while although I'd never been there before.

They're a typical indie coffee house, with wi-fi, gently alternative music and a nice wide selection of hot and cold, caffeinated and otherwise beverages. I had a half-caf cafe au lait (the customer pours their own coffee from the thermoses and then the barista adds the milk, so you can custom-blend your joe) and my mom had a chai tea latte - which was completely AWESOME.

They also make their own gelato and Monday's featured flavor was maple bacon. Doesn't that just sound so good? I'll give them "good," but not necessarily "so good." There was a ton of bacon bits in the scoop I had - substantial pieces of real bacon too - and it added a lovely smoky/salty flavor. I would have preferred it to have been fried a little crisper, however, as being in ice cream tends to soften the bacon quickly.

The gelato itself didn't have that smooth mouth-feel that gelato should have and was not very maple-y either. I realize maple is a difficult flavor and too much can be overpowering, but this was really more along the lines of "vanilla bacon ice cream" than maple bacon gelato. Not that I have an issue with vanilla bacon ice cream, mind you, lordy no, and I scraped the bottom of my dish. It just didn't quite live up to its billing is all.

Link me, m'dear

Life seems a little disjointed to me these days. This is art my blog imitating life. Or something.

Most recently watched: Oldboy, the 2004 Cannes Grand Prix winner by South Korean director, Chanwook Park (whose Lady Vengeance I watched not too long ago). Simply incredible movie. It's similar to Lady Vengeance - Park seems to have a recurring revenge motif - in that the protagonist is imprisoned for a long time and then, once released, sets out to take revenge upon his jailer. Again, gorgeously shot (American movies seem so cluttered after watching these Korean films), a little long, terrifically violent (I had to watch the oral surgery scenes through my fingers) and utterly compelling. Great stuff. Steven Spielberg and Will Smith apparently want to remake Oldboy to which I vehemently say: NO F'N WAY.

Maple Bacon Toffee : available for only a few more days ('til 8/31!) at swanky San Francisco confectioners, Recchuiti. I think this sounds just scrumptious. The store site also has a recipe for applewood smoked bacon gougeres, which look like teensy little biscuits, and a way coolio blog that I intend on exploring soon (there's mention of a maple bacon donut ...). Thanks to Blonde Ambition for the tip!

Latest job that I wish was mine: writing the blog for the National Confectioners Association.

And lastly, Thursday I read that the Weather Channel's "hurricane expert" thinks that ol' Danny might "miss New England ... and hit the southeastern coast of Maine." Um, yeah. Since when is Maine not part of New England? Jackass.

A toast - to bacon!

Forgive me, readers: it's been thirty-seven days since my last bacon post. I really hadn't found any new, exciting, bacony goodness to share with you. Until I got an email from my California cousin Leah alerting me to the existence of

BACON VODKA

Bakon Vodka. Created by the friendly folks at Black Rock Spirits, this vodka is made with Idaho potatoes and flavored with peppered bacon (or essence thereof). They think it's the perfect vodka for Bloody Marys and have additional recipes as well, including a Bakon Chocolate Martini - of which I would be skeptical, except that I really like chocolate-covered bacon and this would be the same as that ... plus it's a cocktail. Yay! The site has a link for online pre-sales; Leah says Bakon Vodka is not available 'til July.

So what do we do until July? We make our own: Homemade Bacon Vodka [recipe compliments of Brownie Points, a foodie blog I've only just discovered with this recipe and am eager to explore as it seems chockful of goodness]. She also recommends using this bacon-infused vodka in a Bloody Mary (and other cocktails) or mixed with date syrup for a "sweet bacon cordial" (with which I am totally intrigued) or even decanted into a spray bottle for spritzing on, well, anything that needs a spritz of bacon vodka.

Many, many, many thanks to Leah for sending me the links. I owe her bigtime because this is the third time she's hooked me up; the other two are here and here. I don't hang out with her very often - although we obviously have very similar interests - but I'm going to see her in a couple of weeks and I'll raise a glass to, and with, her then.

NIbbles and links

Hi, all - sorry for the posting slackage but for the last couple of days the sun has been OUT and it's been WARM and actually NICE outside, so I thought I'd see what that was like. (It was excellent.) But fear not, there are book reviews and the Lost season finale coming up, and I hear there's like a Star Truck movie or something out that I might go see, so I'll be indoors again soon enough.

In the meantime, there's these for your linking pleasure: Humans vs. Zombies tag (coming soon to a college campus near you!); it's National B.L.T. Month, according to Life.com; and the PBR - whose fans are keeping Ty Murray in Dancing with the Stars - is in Des Moines this weekend. Yeehaw!

What's Shakin' Bacon

Before I went to see Wolverine last Friday I was in need of some sustenance, so I dropped in at Silly's up on Washington Ave. in Portland. I love Silly's: the atmosphere is friendly and funky; the portions are huge; they have The Best French Fries in the city, and also an impressive beer and wine list for such a little place. Usually I get a felafel wrap but this time I had one thing in mind: milkshakes. Specifically their "What's Shakin' Bacon" milkshake. (I also had a salad so shush.)

The milkshake menu is epic - avocado, coconut, key lime pie, cinnamon, molasses, Tang, Guinness - but I'd been thinking about just this one: peanut butter milkshake with a huge tangle of hot, crispy bacon on top. Pure genius. The shake isn't huge, but it is delicious, and the amount of bacon easily outstrips (haha) any side order you will find at any of the local diners. It's a little expensive ($5) but did I mention how much bacon you get?

I felt a little foolish, eating a milkshake topped with bacon, until I saw another one come out of the kitchen, heading for some other lucky patron, and I remembered that when it comes to bacon, nothing's foolish. Plus, as the restaurant's tagline goes, "As far as we can discern, the universe is a very silly place - A. Einstein."

Bacon bits

I recently heard the question "has bacon jumped the shark?" Horrified, I hit the interwebs and found that yes, some people are tired of all the recent bacon press. This, to me, is just proof that aliens walk amongst us.

I, obviously, believe that you can never have too much bacon:

Bacon Today has a recent post about bacon paintings.

My Cuzzin Hannah let me know that she tried a rauchbier at Chuckanut Brewery (Bellingham, WA) and it had a definite essence of bacon - and so she thought of me. How sweet!

In support of this, Friend of the Blog Kevin C. found a link to an article on rauchbiers, described as “liquid bacon,” just as my cuzzin said. He also checked out BeerAdvocate and found a review for an actual "bacon beer" on tap at the Front Street Ale House / San Juan Brewing Co. in Friday Harbor (also in WA - I'm beginning to think that Washington State is a haven for bacon-lovers).

Friend of the Blog Jessica R. recently had fantastic eggs drizzled with bacony goodness for breakfast at the Front Room.

And now, after all of this, I have a wicked craving for a BLT. Off to the kitchen!

Leaving you bacon for more

Hey there, y'all - I have to 'fess up to something: I probably will not be getting next week's Heroes and Lost episode recaps up in my usual timely manner as I will be on vacation and have no idea what my television/internet capabilities will be. I ask that you please not abandon me completely: if I can see the episodes, I will get the recaps up somehow; and if I can't watch them, I'll have them up before the following week's episodes air.

Let's be honest with each other, though - it's not like Heroes is going to be any big surprise. Nathan is going be heading up patrols to catch and incarcerate the empowered folk, like the wishywashy hypocrite he is; Mr. Bennet will be conflicted in his role as enforcer; Sylar will be conflicted in his role as fugitive 'cause he kinda just wants to be good now; Peter and Claire-Bear will be whiny; and Mohinder will continue to suck all the life out of every scene he's in. You know I'm right.

As an offering of appeasement then, I leave you with this magnificence that has been making the interweb rounds (both Mr. Mouse and friend of the blog Kevin C. forwarded the links to me): the Bacon Explosion from BBQ Addicts - four pounds of bacon, pork sausage and BBQ sauce bliss (a/k/a heart attack on a plate). To quote Brad L.: "I don't know whether to eat it or worship it." Although I don't see why we can't do both.

Enjoy your week! Watch lots of television! Come back and see me soon!

First bacon post of 2009: accoutrements

Thanks to the excellent research skills and generosity of Friend of the Blog, Shari E., I can report on two new (new to me, anyway) dental/oral hygiene products: bacon-flavored breath mints and bacon-flavored dental floss. These obviously fall into the "what will they think of next" category. Mr. Mouse and I volunteered to be guinea pigs for you all and here are our findings:

Uncle Oinker's Savory Bacon Mints. (made in China, of course) These small, aspirin-sized mints come 100 to a tin and are positively redolent of bacon. Well, maybe bacon with a hint of Vicks Vap-o-rub. They are surprisingly good, bacony and sweet: I thought they tasted more like sugar-cured bacon while Mr. Mouse said he could detect the hint of mint, pronouncing them "strange but certainly not offensive." And no chemical aftertaste - which I was worried about. If you're really a bacon nut - I mean, REALLY - you could do worse than pick up a tin of these "mints."

Waxed Bacon Floss. The packaging declares "effectively removes plaque" and "Mmm! leaves mouth bacon fresh." Again, the floss smells quite bacony but this time, there's nary a bacon flavor to be had. "It's not doin' it for me," said Mr. Mouse - and he is both a bacon fiend and a dedicated flosser. Bottom line: flossing your teeth with regular dental floss while frying up a pan of real bacon is a better bet than bacon floss.

2008 - a pretty good year at ol' FMS

Here's the typical, self-indulgent year-end summary post that us bloggers looooove to inflict upon their reader(s).

• I put up 216 posts and hit my one year anniversary

• I reviewed 46 movies (most on DVD but some in theaters and one online!)

• I reviewed 26 books (Mom: that's a pretty good number, seeing how it takes me 3-5x longer to get through a book than a movie)

• I recapped - in full or in part - the following television shows: Deadwood, Lost, Firefly, Burn Notice, Flashpoint, True Blood, Fringe and Heroes

• One of the best books I read this year was Sharp Teeth

• One of the best movies I saw this year was The Fall

• I wracked my brain for my favoritest movies of all time (as of that day)

• I was pretty interested in bacon (here, here, here, here and here)

Thank you all so much for your patronage, your interest and your comments this year. I'm still having so much fun - Mr. Mouse can't believe I'm sticking with this - and am really looking forward to the coming year. 'Til then, my best wishes to you all for a happy, healthy and entertaining 2009!

Chocolate + Bacon = Mmmmmmmmm

A Secret Non-Sectarian Gift-Giver (you know who you are) recently gave me the greatest gift of all: a Flying Chocolate Pig - "applewood smoked bacon + Alder wood-smoked salt + deep milk chocolate" - from Vosges Haut Chocolate. Finally, two great tastes that taste great together!

Ensconced in an adorable little pig-with-wings shape, this carnivorous candy was devoured in about five bites. The chocolate itself was quite mild, bland almost, with very little mouth feel to it, but studded with tiny chunks of salty, crispy bacon. Since the chocolate was so mellow, the stronger initial flavor is of the bacon; the aftertaste was chocolate, however.

You should have seen me trying to get Mr. Mouse to try a bite. He sniffed it, brought it close a couple of times before licking the chocolate and then nibbling off the teensiest of nibbles, and finally announcing that chocolate and bacon do not go together. He's ridiculous and I think he's wrong. I quite enjoyed my flying chocolate pig and can state definitively that chocolate and bacon do, in fact go together. I think the experience would only be improved with a slightly richer chocolate is all.

It's been twenty days since my last post about bacon ...

This link is provided compliments of one of my most bestest grrl-friends, DCPQ (a/k/a "Blonde Ambition"), who says: "If David Lebovitz were a girl, [my husband] would probably consider stalking her. Instead he just reads his blog." Potayto, potahto, I say.

Regardless, not only does ol' David Lebovitz give us a recipe for Candied Bacon Ice Cream (!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!), he's also got a whole bunch of further bacon links down at the bottom of the page. Read, drool, enjoy.

If I'm not mistaken, here's another post about bacon

My Cuzzin Hannah is my favorite cousin* because she just sent us Mouses a care package, all the way from Seattle, with Bacon Salt! (That was an impressive taping job, by the way.) I knew what it was as soon as I opened my P.O. box and I'm fair certain I ran a few red lights to get home that much faster.

Somehow the geniuses behind this product have managed to get Original Bacon flavor, low-sodium Hickory Bacon flavor and Peppered Bacon flavor out of a complicated amalgamation of sea salt, paprika, dehydrated garlic, onion, smoke flavor, soy sauce and various and sundry other ingredients, many of which I cannot pronounce. Amazingly, it is no-calorie, no-fat, vegetarian and certified kosher, and it really does make everything taste like bacon.

My current favorite is the Peppered Bacon version (because that's two condiments in one!) - it's got a little extra bite due to the cayenne pepper. Mr. Mouse prefers the Original Bacon Salt because he thinks Hickory tastes like BBQ potato chips which he can't stand ... which is weird because he loves actual BBQ sauce. Mr. Mouse is a complicated man.

This stuff is way better than it has any right to be and I fear for our sodium levels in the days to come. So far I have tried Bacon Salt on hard-boiled eggs, rice, lima beans and pork chops. You heard that right: we put Bacon Salt on pork chops. That just makes the pig exponential and there's nothing wrong with that. Tomorrow I'm envisioning a sprinkle on my bagel with cream cheese in the morning; a shake or two with my grilled cheese for lunch ... at this rate we'll have worked our way through all three bottles in no time (I'm going to have to find a closer supplier than Washington State).

I encourage you to seek this brilliant stuff out: their website lists retailers or you can order directly from them online. Give it a try and tell me what you think. In other bacon-related topics, Reel Whore sent me this link to a fellow movie blogger who found bacon-flavored toothpicks (!!), and you can go here for daily bacon updates. And you all thought I had an obsession.

* If any of you other cousins want to try out for this prestigious position, I also like chocolate and single malt scotch.

Continuing with the bacon obsession

Since there's no new Heroes tonight, I offer you this instead from my California cousin Leah (I'm beginning to think that my overweening love of bacon is a genetic thing):

PIG CANDY

Slice strips of bacon, roll in dark brown sugar (with a little pepper or cayenne to give it kick - or not, your choice). Place the strips of bacon on a cookie rack on top of a deep pan. Bake in oven at 325 for 20 minutes or so, turning once to ensure even cooking.

I haven't tried this yet but you're darn tootin' that I'm gonna. Thanks, Leah!

Pass the bacon and pepper, please

I just found out about this last night and I am desperate, desperate I tell you, to find this stuff: bacon-flavored salt. In three different flavors - original, hickory smoked and peppered - this seasoned salt will take you as close to Nirvana (the state of being, not the grunge band) as possible. Everything is better with bacon, I believe, and having this zero fat, zero calorie, vegetarian and kosher (kosher! Bacon Salt is kosher! the mind boggles) salt to sprinkle on, well, everything, would be bliss. Instead of having bacon and eggs, you can just have eggs that taste like bacon. My baked potato could taste like bacon. Heck, my margaritas could taste like bacon. Wait, that's just silly. But you see my point. I believe that the pig is the perfect edible animal, and that bacon is the perfect part of the pig. With Bacon Salt, I can have bacon all the time, guilt free.