Lots of new Shortround posts this week. Here's another one where you can actually watch for yourself. From Mark Blitch comes The Code, a horror comedy short that part Buffy part Shaun of the Dead.
The tagline says it all: Put it on your Google Calendar
the jaded viewer says: At 6 minutes, The Code cleverly polishes it's Buffy dialogue and Shaun of the Dead references while throwing in cameos chock full of horror icons. It's funny and knows the stereotypical horror cliches it parodies. I like the cliched opening of a douchebag alpha male with the supposed dumb blonde though I was 100% sure she was a Buffy in disguise.
The vampire, chainsaw slasher and Bigfoot were solid surprises but Taylor Brandt as zombie Shaun steals the show with his loyalty for Google Calendar. Obvious reference aside, it made me LOL and the makeup and FX won ton of awards at the Splatterfest Festival in Houston.
Good job by all those involved and I'm happy you all were able to see it as well.
There is a king of the slow burn horror movie and his name is Ti West. West, who's filmography includes The Roost, Cabin Fever 2 and The House of Devil has made a name for himself in the methodically paced horror movie. I was not a fan of this in The House of the Devil writing:
"However, at the end of the day the movie is a wicked slow slow slow burn. It takes so long to get to the nitty gritty that no Red Bulls were helping to keep me awake."
However, in The Innkeepers the slow burn has hills and valleys and surprisingly has humor in it filled with cleverisms and pop culturisms that rescue it from being engulfed in eternal boredom. It dabbles in LOLs while fine tuning a ghost story as it's central premise. What you get is a fun, mish mash of amateur ghost hunter hipsters making contact with the ethereal plain which slowly evolves The Innkeepers into a non laughing matter.
The Innkeepers is smart enough to know it's audience and by doing so gives us an old fashioned spooky throwback ghost story that balances the line between being cute and scary. The characters are drones, the guests are odd and the ghosts are cliched visual jump scares. With all the said, I still had a few problems with West's lack of a firepower ending and his overabundance to drag the movie into zzzzzzzzzzz territory but some things can be overlooked when I'm having fun.
But I'm all for the nostalgia for my vintage Poltergeists for the new millennium. The Innkeepers could be Generation X's's answer to that 80s classic.
Boring Plot-O-Matic
After over one hundred years of service, The Yankee Pedlar Inn is shutting its doors for good. The last remaining employees - Claire (Sara Paxton) and Luke (Pat Healy)- are determined to uncover proof of what many believe to be one of New England's most haunted hotels. As the Inn’s final days draw near, odd guests check in as the pair of minimum wage “ghost hunters” begin to experience strange and alarming events that may ultimately cause them to be mere footnotes in the hotel’s long unexplained history.
Awesome Review-O-Matic
When you do a supernatural horror movie, you can possibly go one of two ways. You can go all LOLs or you could go deadly serious. It seems Ti West elected to do both. In The Innkeepers, Claire (Sara Paxton) and Luke (Pat Healy) are hotel worker drones who man the Yankee Pedlar Inn (in CT) for one last weekend before it goes out of business. There is a history of dread, as the hotel has a legend of Madeline O'Malley, whose death in a cellar has caused her to haunt this now defunct hotel.
The movie revolves around the dynamic of our hipster duo. Luke documents the history of his paranormal workplace on a website while Claire is in awe of a famous old timey actress (who she adores) that has checked into the hotel. Both are realistic drones who burn their boredom away with clever dialogue, actual job duties, beer and a search for scientific proof of the supernatural.
Staying at the hotel 24/7, they take shifts but at night, Claire goes all Fox Mulder and starts hearing the creeks and squeaks of something not right. It's here West goes all slow burn, hovering above Claire as she searches the remnants of a hotel (sometimes in full daylight) other times in the dead of night. Sara Paxton has a mesmerizing quality that made me buy into her performance. Claire is an asthmatic, everyday girl whose ambition has slowly died away. Paxton's performance is quirky stellar, similar to that of the cutout of a "hot gamer girl" but in this case "hot ghost hunter girl".
Pat Healy's Luke is goofball lovable. He's the horror geek, bad at web design, obsessed with the supernatural and possibly infatuated with his partner in crime. And his performance is not condescending to us horror hipsters at all. I could easily call these characters my friends.
But West wants to make sure that you get just enough haha's before he unleashes his House of the Devil style slow burn jump scares. And don't worry you get some eerie buildup of falsehoods and glimpses of either hallucinations, dreams or actual paranormal phenomenon. The fact that it's vague is part of the charm all the way to the end. It's almost a perfect film in how the atmosphere gets built up (a lost art in my opinion) and a perfect blueprint feature resembling those viral Internet videos with the "actual ghost footage" that leads to a growly scream of a "ghost" that usually scares the shit out of you.
My gripes, though few, are the things I originally said about House/Devil. I appreciate the false alarms but they take fuckin a Lord of the Rings trilogy to get there. Other characters such as Leanne Rease-Jones (played by Kelly McGillis) is the equivalent of the guy who always knows about the legend. Leanne plays a healer/medium who senses danger but elects to stay at the creepy hotel anyway. A few more guests make appearances but none add to the overall film.
Finally, I still don't think Ti West knows how to end a film. With such buildup, one demands an ending which can hold up the entire movie. Instead, West goes all conventional and I was a bit disappointed. I'm not looking for some M. Night Shalatwisters, but it still felt a little flat.
But as I said before The Innkeepers is damn fuckin smart. Characters react as I thought I would react, they get nervous, stammer and crack jokes like I would. Call me a horror hipster too. I'm not ashamed. The Innkeepers is a Generation X ode to the horror ghost story that younglings will like but keep us hardcore aged horror fanatics on our toes. I love my nostalgia not remade but repackaged in original creative tales. Ti West has finally made a movie I liked, nay loved. That's a first.
The slow burn horror king has built a kingdom with a unique style, flair and has a treasure room of all those very familiar cliches. Sometimes royalty shares the wealth with the people and Ti West does just that. Hopefully the 99% will see The Innkeepers for the gem that it is.
Nude-ipedia
Sara Paxton shows some leg (she's so damn cute!)
WTF moment The first encounter with Madeline O'Malley
The Jaded Viewer's Final Prognosis
The Innkeepers will premiere on Video in Demand on December 30th, 2011. It'll be in theaters on February 3rd, 2012 courtesy of Magnet Releasing. The film is in conjunction with Dark Sky Films and Larry Fessenden's Glass Eye Pix.
The Innkeepers is definitely going to find a place on my Top 10 of 2011 list. If you're looking for a quality old fashioned spookster, this is the perfect film.
Sometimes looks can be deceiving and that's never been more evident in Eli Craig's Tucker and Dale vs Evil.
The fun in Tucker and Dale is that it takes the redneck/hillbilly slasher and turns it upside down. What if the hillbillies were just regular Joe Schmoes and the douchebaggy college kids were the dumb schmucks that caused 'da killin.
If you ever saw Wrong Turn, Friday the 13th. Texas Chainsaw and Hills Have Eyes films, you can grasp where this is going. It's been a while since I've seen a horror comedy that knows the genre its making fun of. All the stereotypical elements are dropped in from the music to the scary general store owner to Dale's maniacal laughter. But all are misunderstood elements that twist the hillbilly horror genre into a world of strange coincidences and full of LOLs.
It's a film that definitely holds its own in the Shaun of the Dead and Zombieland horror comedy pantheon of films. Tudyk and Labine are a comedic duo of devilish funnies. I'll say it right now. It may be the best horror comedy this year. It hits all the right banjo notes, is awesomely quick witted and a very clever parody of redneck slashers.
Boring Plot-O-Matic
Tucker and Dale are two best friends on vacation at their dilapidated mountain house, who are mistaken for murderous backwoods hillbillies by a group of obnoxious, preppy college kids. When one of the students gets separated from her friends, the boys try to lend a hand, but as the misunderstanding grows, so does the body count.
Awesome Review-O-Matic
The formula is followed to the tee. Group of douchebag, frat potheads head to West Virginia (I mean seriously where else could this movie take place?) for some camping fun. You got the polo shirt (collars up) dickhead frat boy, his goofy friends, the one hot blonde chick (Katrina Bowden), the slutty girl and get this TWO! token black people (a guy and girl). They are easily spooked by their surroundings as well as our heroes Tucker (Alan Tudyk) and Dale (Tyler Labine).
The misplaced stereotypes hit a mile a minute as our college kids think Dale is a carbon caricature of all that is redneck. But in reality Tucker, the confident thinker with dreams of a vacation home and Dale (a shy but smart bowler) are just regular folk doing regular things and somehow get caught up in a web of stupidity caused by our frightened college dweebs.
And the jokes are pure Three's Company like. From out of context conversations to Tucker yielding a smokin chainsaw, all the comedy revolves around Tucker and Dale's unfortunate events as they vacation and fix their vacation fixed upper. After they rescue Ally (the hottest blonde I have seen this year) after an accidental lake incident, she starts to realize Tucker and Dale are not what they thought they were. She and Dale bond because as you all know the fat guy always scores the hot chick.
But where Tucker and Dale shines are the ridiculous self deaths of our college kids. Impalements via trees, via sticks, via wood chipper and via gunshots are LOL hilarious. All are caused by the kids themselves with Tucker exacerbated tells the inept policeman: "Oh hidy ho officer, we've had a doozy of a day. There we were minding our own business, just doing chores around the house, when kids started killing themselves all over my property."
The movie does tend to drag a bit towards the end. A rescue goes awry and dogs are in danger. Ally goes all therapy session as Dale and Chad (our douchebaggy leader) try to talk things out. But the fiery conclusion is a bit over the top as Tucker and Dale try to rescue Ally from the clutches of Hollinger boy.
Tucker and Dale vs Evil is full of ridiculousness and genre cliches turned inside out. It works because the audience likes our heroes. Tudyk and Labine work well together acting as perfect clones of beer guzzling rednecks. Labine of course known for his work on Reaper and Mad Love (I remember him fondly for Dead Last) gives us the lovable unconfident fat guy he plays so well. Alan Tudyk (Firefly and Dollhouse 4 life!) is the perfect counterbalance to Dale. If your not a fan of The Tudyk, you will be after this flick.
Eli Craig makes this work because he knows what we look for in this sub genre. And by twizzler twisting it all around and making us root for Tucker and Dale, he's giving us a gimmick we haven't seen before. The movie has won a ton of awards via the festival circuit and a sequel is already being hinted at.
Whoever Tucker and Dale take on next is going to be in a world of hurt. Hurting from all the laughter they'll inflict to the audience.
Nude-ipedia
Katrina Bowden in skimpy outfits is hotter than any naked chicks
Gore-ipedia
Self inflicted deaths are o plenty and they are gruesomely hilarious Impalements in various forms Accidental fire combustion WTF moment
The safety is off
The Jaded Viewer's Final Prognosis
Tucker and Dale vs Evil will be released by Magnet Releasing and will come out on August 26th via VOD and September 30th in theaters.
This a must see for all horror fans. It's that damn good.
Well let me first say I never saw Ninjas vs Zombies, Justin Timpane's first cult film. Maybe that's a good thing as I can judge Ninjas vs Vampires without any baggage.
Clearly a film with a title like this makes you think you're going to see some SyFy smoke and mirrors bad CGI, bad acting and incoherent plot. And that's not to far off from the truth. Ninjas vs Vampires is a b-movie low budget spectacle with mediocre CGI, quirky acting and an incoherent plot. But all of what's above is what makes it likable.
I wouldn't go as far as to call it "It's so bad, it's good" but what I will say is it's got a DIY indie spirit that pushes it into a Rebecca Black Friday likable. Ninjas vs Vampires is a pop culture machine of funness. It never takes itself to seriously, zings in cleverly clever one liners and has some not too shabby fight scenes. Bringing in the elements of the kung fu film with the retardedness of the cliched vampire genre, NvV is a cult classic for the horror fan who thinks they've seen it all.
Score one for Team Ninja. Boring Plot-O-Matic
Ninjas battle vampires for the fate of the world in this all new Action-Horror-Comedy from the creators of 2010’s cult smash, Ninjas vs. Zombies! Moments after down-on-his-luck Aaron is rejected by the girl of his dreams, they both are attacked by blood-sucking vampires. Driven to save her, Aaron tracks down the mysterious ninjas, who wage a nightly war against the forces of darkness. Now, as the vampire overlord Seth plots to destroy mankind, Aaron has only one choice - join the ninjas, save the world, and get the girl... or die trying.
Sexy, funny, shocking, and bloody, Ninjas vs. Vampires delivers an action-packed comedic adventure unlike any other! Awesome Review-O-Matic
Well a standard review would be pretty much be boring. So I'm going with random Karate Kid and Buffy quotes to get you in the mood of the film.
"Get him a body bag! Yeah!"
Seems like we our BFF's Aaron and Alex stumble unto a full on war between vamps and ninjas. One begs to question if this is what happens everyday in Suburbia, America. I like to think a daily war happens between these two groups at the Hot Topic.
"To make you a vampire they have to suck your blood. And then you have to suck their blood. It's like a whole big sucking thing. Mostly they're just gonna kill you. Why am I still talking to you?"
The vamps are straight out of the Joss Whedon rejected characters list. Your typical Anne Rice metrosexual, his horny whore, a few Jay and Bob rejects, some Phantom of the Opera dollar store dweebs and a "I'm a crazy homicidal vamp guy". Plus vampire henchman.
"Wax on, wax off"
So our ninjas are of the non asian variety. I mean I figure asians trained in karate are in short supply in the indie horror world. Their's your Willow clone witch, 2 Caucasian Akira's, an ex vampire (see like Spike!) and our new recruits.
They get inducted and we're off to fight the vamps.
"We like to talk big. Vampires do. "I'm going to destroy the world." That's just tough guy talk. Strutting around with your friends over a pint of blood. The truth is, I like this world. You've got... dog racing, Manchester United. And you've got people, billions of people walking around like Happy Meals with legs."
So the vamps have some sort of plan, set traps and want some sort of amulet. It's not really important. What is is how when our vamps battle our ninjas, we get our standard supply of Blade fire poofing. Lots of CGI done on a Mac here. Lots of sliced legs, punctured CGI blood and vamps going all flamey combustion.
Some of it is indeed laughable but you start to realize what kind of movie you're watching. OK guys, read this because it's technically important part of the review.
Ninjas vs Vampires is a b-movie horror fandom flick made my horror fans who love b-movie horror flicks. Timpane, his crew and his actors homage all the genre films and make fun of the one's they loathe. From insults of "sparkling vampires" to quotable quotes uttered in a Scooby Gang fashion, it's a love letter to kung fu flicks and vampire cheesiness.
And you either buy into watching this fan made film or you don't. We've all watched our share of fan made shorts, trailers and films on YouTube. This one is just done more professionally, relatively speaking.
"Better learn balance. Balance is key. Balance good, karate good. Everything good. Balance bad, better pack up, go home. Understand?"
But of course that doesn't mean it's all happy skippity doo. The dialogue is clever but the actors don't seem to have the comedic timing I was hoping for. Sure you'll get a chuckle on a few one liners but mostly it's a rushed indie blockbuster film with lots of ambition. The movie was made in some dude's house (maybe without their knowledge!) and their isn't a lick of gratuitous nudity (well somebody was gonna ask) I sometimes don't understand why a low budget indie has to order the complete package of cheesy CGI, ridiculous costumes and over the top dialogue. Or wait...is that the point? Is that intentional? Hmmm I'd like to know. Did they want to go in that direction to make it more funny. Hell even BtVs look kinda bad compared to todays CGI.
In any case, Team Ninjas prevail in the end and a double kicker sets up another sequel.
I'll admit, I didn't get bored watching Ninjas vs Vampires. It has some delicious hotties to look at, has some adept fighting scenes and a few ha ha's that make it tolerable. It's a little ambitious yes, but it's so self aware that it probably knows it's ridiculous.
Hell, I mean the title says it all.
Gore-ipedia
Pixels of gore and splatter
Nude-ipedia
Sigh...none.
WTF moment The vampire henchmen are kinda dumb as bricks
The Jaded Viewer's Final Prognosis
Need a vampire and ninja film fix? This be the film for you.
Ho Hum. It's another slasher flick with a movie in a movie gimmick. Right off the tranny heels of Ticked-Off Trannies With Knives, Israel Luna brings us another homage of sorts with Fright Flick. This slasher flick seems to be Luna's take on those campy and cartooney 80s slasher flicks of old.
I'm all for keeping it old school and seeing a few blood splattered walls and neck trauma but Fright Flick is so generic and assembly line produced I'd rather watch a rom com.
The movie relishes in playing out a horror movie within a horror movie set. Cast of characters include our gay as hell director and make up artist, greedy producer, eager script writers, line producers, PAs and big breasted actresses. Soon a mysterious killer is slicing and dicing our cast and crew until our back to scenes guy gathers the clues to find out who's been naughty.
I'm not sure where Luna wanted to go here (he wrote and directed). With Trannies, the exploitation gimmick with a twist made an ordinary grindhouse flick feel new and inventive. But here, the horror movie production that's real twist has been used in so many ways, you might as well just go 360 and make the horror movie the actual horror movie within the film.
Fright Flick is campy and corny and jokey...like Jokey Smurf. Sure the explosion in a gift gag is funny the first 3 times but after a while you want Gargamel to eat that motherfucker. We carefully encounter a reveal which can be easily figured out using your standard Sherlock Holmes detective manual.
The gore is pretty standard as is the nudity. I mean big boobies on girls that look like 6's at best kinda sucks. The ending goes as far as copying shot for shot the ending of an infamous slasher flick of the 80s. With all this, the movie falls flat like the survivor girl's chest.
Luna has the talent to push the edges of indie horror in a refreshing way but Fright Flick is like his Mallrats. Sometimes your going to make a movie that just plain sucks. It's good to get it out of the way now.
Gore-ipedia
Slice and Dice
Nude-ipedia
Boobies all around by at best 6's
WTF moment
That shot for shot ending from that movie with the psycho mom
The Jaded Viewer's Final Prognosis
Fright Flick will be released on DVD via Breaking Glass Pictures from their Vicious Circle Films label. It's now available on DVD as of Jan 25th.
I never think a director or writer ever reads my reviews. The Jaded Viewer is a small corner of the interweb and I mean you'd think they'd be to busy to bother to read what a NYC horror blogger has to say about their film.
But when I reviewed Gary King's Dismal: Eat or be Eaten, I kinda made a few zingers at the movie's expense. Shockingly, I got an e-mail from writer and producer Bo Buckley and he appreciated that I reviewed the film even though it wasn't overly positive.
Added to this, I actually didn't know about director Gary King's other work too. His filmography reads like an art house menu of NYC based films. So when Mr. Buckley informed me that he had teamed up with Gary King again, and this time it was a kung fu zombie comedy, I didn't know what to think. The trailer looked pretty hilarious though but would this end up dismal like Dismal?
I'm glad to say it didn't.
Death of the Dead is a campy horror kung fu comedy, comparable to seeing a YouTube video of a dude getting kicked in the groin. Think Karate Kid meets Troma and throw in a little bit of Scary Movie and some Zucker Brothers. Mix in a blender and you got Death of the Dead.
I'll admit I LOL-ed throughout most of the movie as the gags, inside jokes, 4th wall breaking jokes had me on the floor. Sure it's an indie production but it doesn't look like it. The dialogue winked at the audience a few times, the CGI (which didn't work in Dismal) seemed right at home in this comedy and the acting by our lead Christina Rose who plays Wanda is spot on brilliant.
Sure some jokes fell flat and a few scenes were mostly filler but it's not like your watching Inception here. It's definitely a film that cliches itself to death (all intentional) and includes a scene with ball busting numchucks.
I mean what more can you ask for? Boring Plot-O-Matic It's Karate Kid meets 28 Days Later in this over-the-top horror / action / comedy from Strange Stuff Productions. Wanda is an uber nerd with the coordination of a seizure victim. Her karate trainer is an aging pervert with a penchant for ball gags and various sex toys. When a bus from a rival karate school accidentally runs over a couple scientists dumping a toxic chemical down the sewer, the entire class is turned into high flying, flesh eating baddies!
As they wreak havoc on the town turning others into zombie ninjas, Wanda and her instructor must save the planet with the help of a magic karate belt. That's right, I said MAGIC KARATE BELT. An epic feature full of brains, boobs and bad ass bitches, Death of the Dead is fun for the whole family!
Awesome Review-O-Matic
There have been a ton of horror parodies of late. Zombieland and Scary Movie come to mind. But in the indie world, these comedies are not often seen but they rival the best Hollywood has to offer.
Death of the Dead is chock full of sight gags, toilet humor and self aware jokes that it had me laughing at all this kung fu foolery. It's also smart enough to not be those movies where you parody the latest popular movie (sorry Twilight fans). What it does is take 2 genres, the karate action movie and the zombie movie and mixes in the cliches from both to make a comedy that cleverly mocks the mockery.
I'm not usually good at reviewing comedies so I'm turning this review into a jaded viewer cliche review with the old standby Q&A review! This is where I answer the questions I make up that I think you'd ask.
1.) Wanda is Daniel-son type uber nerd but she transforms into a kick ass, karate zombie killer. OK I can buy that, but she gets naked right?
Alas no nudity by our zombie killing vixen but in the first 3 minutes we get boobs and thats a plus in my book. The opening scene has stereotypical cheerleaders doing stereotypical cheerleading things like being bitchy, cat fighting and being lesbian.
2.) So the relationship between Wanda and her sensei is strictly platonic right? Does that mean I get to see boobs?
Jeez, what's your obsession with boobs dude? Wanda and Master Sensei develop a bizarro world Daniel-Miyagi relationship. The first half of the movie is a total Karate Kid parody complete with Wanda being made fun of and a final karate tournament match. DOTD skewers 80s montages, the old Cobra-Kai cliche and the evil sensei.
And then there's a cat fight in a kiddie pool filled with mud....or it could have been poo. My money is on poo.
3.) I'm not that literate when it comes to theoretical quantum physics. What do you mean by 4th wall?
The most hilarious moments are when the movie breaks the 4th wall. From visible boom operators to a very noticable stunt double, I can't help but laugh when this happens. It's a brilliant gag that hasn't been used very much. Think Wayans I'm Gonna Git you Sucka and Menace. Last time I saw this was in Black Dynamite.
DOTD somehow places these gags in just the right places and at the right time. Like if I told you right now I was writing this while eating a McRib. See what I mean?
4.) WTF man! Kung Fu Zombies?
So some toxic goo turns the evil Cobra-Kai team into zombies and they take over Cleveland, OH. I know what your thinking. Kung fu zombies is a brilliant adversary for our uber nerd turned slice happy Wanda. As the town is overrun, Master Sensei and his box of sex toys try to save the day.
5.) I heard that ILM did the special effects for this. Is that true?
I joked that the CGI in Dismal was bad at one point wrote "The CGI fire and explosion look so fake, it's like they put a lighter in front of the camera." The same effects return here. But somehow when you see a zombie split in half and it looks cheesy, you laugh and you know its part of the joke.
6.) Ummmm so this is a smart kung fu zombie horror comedy? Are you on drugs?
[Inhales via bong while simultaneously doing crystal meth]
What? Nope not on drugs. The thing about DOTD is its kinda smart with its in jokes. Bo Buckley inserts a few ha ha's while ridiculing the cliche of exposition and plot explaining. The characters are stereotypical but somehow feel unique and different with some anti-cliche personalities.
I don't know. I kinda dug Wanda's nerdo to hottie transformation as well as her gothy sidekick in tow. I even laughed at Master Sensei's stupidity. 7.) It can't all be good. Something must have sucked. What was the suckage?
Well there were a few jokes that didn't work. There is so many dick and fart jokes I can take. You'd think gross out humor and over the top props and sexual innuendo would be fun, but some jokes are done over and over again. The fight scenes were completely laughable but I didn't care because Wanda was slicing and dicing in a Wonder Woman outfit bought from an S&M store. Yum.
8.) So what's the deal here? Am I going to like this? Is their subtle satire in this comedy that will make me reevaluate the world?
Umm no. It's a fun little indie horror comedy that is a total time waster. I would say Death of the Dead is right up there with the best Troma movies (maybe even a bit better). Gary King makes the movie completely coherent and has good set up then punchline scenes. The writing has got lots of smarty jokes, the acting is top notch led by Christina Rose as Wanda.
Death of the Dead smartly recognizes what the audience knows, what it's making fun of and what the audience wants. There hasn't been a horror comedy about kung fu zombies that I know of. Let Death of the Dead be your first.
WTF moment
Wanda gets revenge on the "Sweep the leg Johnny!" character
The Jaded Viewer's Final Prognosis
I believe Death of the Dead is playing a few film fests before it gets released on DVD. Check out the official site for more info.
If you're like me, that title goes with one film and one film only and that's Peter Jackson's zombie classic. But let's not judge the film based on title alone. Because if you know horror, you know who Kevin Tenney is. The man has quite a directorial horror resume which includes Witchboard and the classic Night of the Demons.
So I kinda knew what I'd be in for when I watched Brain Dead. But could Tenney bring back all that was fun about mutant zombie 80s gorefests?
Great cerebral cortexes! Yes he can.
Brain Dead is an assembly line produced throwback 80s splatter flick that hits all on all the cliches that make the genre so great to watch. Gratuitous nudity, gratuitous gore, gratuitous over the top makeup and gratuitous snarky characters spewing curse words a mile a minute. It took a director from the 80s to actually make a good, solid 80s throwback splatterfest.
Sure it's a low budget, been there, done that premise, but sometimes you just gotta go with the ridiculousness and try to shut off your brain like the zombies in this film.
Boring Plot-O-Matic
What do a pair of escaped convicts, a preacher and his assistant, and a pair of pretty hikers have in common? They’re all delicious.
After an extraterrestrial parasite crash-lands in a backwoods American town – landing squarely on the head of a local fisherman – it sparks a fast spreading zombie infestation. As the brain hungry monsters multiply, three pairs of unlucky misfits convene on a fishing lodge for shelter. With zombies pounding at the door, the stranded, mismatched travelers must band together to stop the invasion – or serve themselves up as a main course. The problem is, they may lose their minds to each other before losing their brains to the zombies.
Full of ingenious gore effects, nudity and witty banter, “Brain Dead” is just as much a parody of classic zombie films as it is a clever update to the beloved genre.
Awesome Review-O-Matic
Let's review a movie by breaking it out by cliches. It's got em all and I felt like I time traveled and was watching a movie through my VCR. the only thing that was different was I didn't have to fix the tracking....and I have an awesome TV. So let's start off with the most important shit first.
Gratuitous NUDITY!!!!!!
In the first 30 minutes, we get to see not 1, not 2, not 3 but 4...YES! Count em 4 sets of boobs in this movie. And I'm not talking about icky fat-ish actresses. Nope we got some hotties showing off their assets.
Names are not important but grades are. Without a doubt, Cristina Tiberia gets an A, Sarah Grant Brendecke gets a B+, Michelle Tomlinson gets a B- and some other chick gets a C.
Yes you will see boobs and they're real and they're spectacular.
Gratuitous Cliched Plot!!!!!!
Some space creature that looks like black ooze crash lands and it's actually a parasitic organism that when it takes over a human body, craves for brains so it can reproduce. Enter zombie mutant puppets.
You've seen this in Night of the Demons and the movie takes elements of Evil Dead, Slither, Evil Aliens and countless others.
Gratuitous Stereotypical Characters!!!!!!
So who do we get to watch for an hour and a half?
A smart ass Sawyer like guy named Clarence
A convicted felon dumb hick named Bob
A lesbian, man hating hottuie named Claudia
A vegan, commune with nature med student named Sherry
A hypocritial lusty preacher named Farnsworth
A God fearing, Tea Party belle named Amy
A few other locals that make for good death fodder
Gratuitous Gore and Splatter!!!!!!
All these people come together and meet in a cabin in the woods (I did mention were in clicheworld right?) where our zombie aliens are looking for fresh BRAAAAAAAAAAINNNNNS!!
The best part of Brain Dead is the non CGI gore. It's old school here with shotgun head blasts, quick edit watermelon blasts (its suppose to be a human head) and decapitations and arm rippage. It's like they DeLoreaned into the past and made this movie in the 80s.
Tons of blood, tons of gore and tons of black ooze vomiting from our zombies to infect other people. Shit was coming out of every orifice dude. And it was fuckin awesome.
Gratuitous Gripes and Negatives!!!!!!
Brain Dead won't be for everyone. Noobs won't understand why us "old timers" think is a big deal about some boobs and gore. But here's a message to you noobs. Boobs and gore were not as easily accessible back in the day. If you saw boobs in a movie, you couldn't believe your eyes. If you saw somebody's heart gets ripped out, you applauded. So we have a special place in our hearts for these movies. You noobs are lucky with your free porn and YouTube.
Brain Dead kinda gets ZZZZZZZZs with some badly written dialogue and goofy makeup effects. But Clarence's snarky one liners had me laughing a few times. His zingers zinged and I have to admit, I chuckled a few times.
But being low budget, you can smell the cheese and it's extra velveetay. What can ya do right?
Brain Dead ain't the best throwback but it's done with fun and care and Kevin Tenney knows what us gorehounds and breasthounds want. All of this is packaged into Brain Dead and I had fun nostalgia-ing to my VHS days. What more can you ask?
Well more boobs would have been nice.
WTF moment
One of the characters get an untimely demise I didn't see coming. Holey moley.
The Jaded Viewer's Final Prognosis
Brain Dead was just released on DVD via Breaking Glass Pictures. You can buy it via Amazon.com.
Good ole America. We're back to take what's rightfully ours. I guy from Pittsburgh created the zombie film so it's fitting we take back the zombie comedy. Hey, Shaun of the Dead, you had your time at the top, but Zombieland shotgunned you out of the way and blew a hole right in your face.
Ruben Fleischer's Zombieland, written by Rhett Reese and Paul Wernick have created the new standard in zombie comedy. You get the feel they took all the zombie culture references (Max Brook's The Zombie Survival Guide being most evident and every other zombie comedy and blended it into a cohesive, yummy tasting awesome comedy.
Woody H., Jesse E, Emma S and Abigail B are all working a nice solid with their performances. Just dead on with Woody as the redneck papa, Jesse playing his Adventureland role in a post apocalyptic way and Emma being the hottie with the scams and Abigail taking her tween acting into overdrive.
OK, enough of the gushing and spewing of love by me. It's just going to get messy. On to the WTF list. SPOILERS OHOY!
1.) The opening slo mo sequence is credit breaking-tastic 2.) Cardio 3.) Double Tap 4.) 406 may be the hottest zombie to appear ever 5.) Columbus, Tallahassee, Wichita and Little Rock (now thats what I call memorable movie character names) 6.) Enjoy the Little Things 7.) The ring con 8.) Twinkies have a half life...I'm sure of it. 9.) Fast moving zombies are only awesome when there in slo mo 10.) The logical conclusion of fat zombies 11.) "You gotta love rednecks!" 12.) Who you gonna call? 13.) I did not know B.M. was in this. So when Zombie Bill showed up I almost laughed out loud my vocal cords 14.) "We're gonna build a fort" (I just liked that line) 15.) Tallahassee goes John Wayne on the amusement park zombies 16.) No more Facebooking status updates ever in Zombieland 17.) Columbus's Diablo Cody self aware dialogue 18.) Bill and Columbus reenact a scene from Ghostbusters with Wichita doing to Janine voice 19.) The end credits have one final scene with Bill and Woody 20.) Bill's demise and Garfield reference
21.) Zombie Kill of the Week!
Here are some of the 47 rules to survive Zombieland
Megagasmic awesome flick thru and thru. The fact they didn't let up with the gore and splatter is a testament to the fact that they know Wiki about zombie movies. It hit on all the right notes, was self aware of what it was parodying but then made it its own.
Zombieland is probably going to be my #1 comedy (not just zombie comedy) of 2009. With this rush of vampire flicks infiltrating TV and movies, the zombie horror comedy movie may be on the decline. But Tallahassee isn't hearing that shit.
Well I may not be the biggest proponent of the horror comedy big budget productions coming from Hollywood, but I'll admit Zombieland looks damn funny. It may be the USA's answer to Shawn of the Dead.
Starring Woody Harrelson and Jesse Eisenberg and a list of up and coming Hollywood hotties (Emma Stone and Amber Heard) and directed by Ruben Fleischer, it seems zombies aren't deader as dead yet after the vampire boom.
In the horror comedy Zombieland focuses on two men who have found a way to survive a world overrun by zombies. Columbus is a big wuss -- but when you're afraid of being eaten by zombies, fear can keep you alive. Tallahassee is an AK-toting, zombie-slaying' bad ass whose single determination is to get the last Twinkie on earth. As they join forces with Wichita and Little Rock, who have also found unique ways to survive the zombie mayhem, they will have to determine which is worse: relying on each other or succumbing to the zombies.
Here be the trailer.
UGO.com has posted exclusive clips of some new videos starring Woody and Jesse answering viewer mail and discussing "rules" of what you need to survive a zombie onslaught. These include different weapons you may need (skillet, swiss army knife, bowling balls, etc.) And what do paper towels and the buddy system have to do with anything?!?
A few months I posted up a trailer for a little indie horror-comedy flick called the Landlord. I recently got a screener of the flick and after my hectic schedule I got around to watching it.
The thing about the horror comedies is that if you attempt to do one, you have to be ready to be compared to the ultimate horror comedy and that of course is Sam Raimi's Evil Dead trilogy. Especially the first one which broke all the rules for low budget but low budget done sooo ultimate freakin well.
The Landlord to me just wasn't funny for what it was trying to do. I recognized the jokes, the strategically placed gags and all, but I had hoped to see a bunch of talking monsters in the vein of an episode of Buffy or Angel. You know acting natural about the supernatural. Vampires, demons, etc just being wickedly funny about being wicked. Sure there were attempts, but the attempts just missed.
What the Landlord felt like was watching those low budget flicks of the 80s (Troma-ish) in a way with rubber bloody leg gags and cheesy special effects. The 100 minutes is filled with many many attempts to be funny about a world full of demons and monsters...but I just couldn't get the joke. Boring Plot-O-Matic
The Landlord is the story of Tyler, the unfortunate young owner of a demon-haunted apartment building. Finding tenants has never been a problem for Tyler, though he does have trouble keeping them alive to pay rent. No matter how nicely Tyler asks the demons not to eat the renters (or to at least wait a month or two), they never listen. And why should they? As far as the demons are concerned, humans are merely dumb, tasty animals - kinda like chickens - and Tyler is their pet monkey.
But all that might change when Tyler takes a liking to the newest tenant, a desperate young woman running from demons of her own…
Awesome Review-O-Matic
Tyler is the landlord in The Landlord. He's like an Apatow clone, chubby but lovable. He has been feeding two demons (one that looks like Lorne from Angel) and another woman demon with a face of a dog?!?
Tenants who rent the apartment and are quickly eaten by the 2 resident demons. Besides these demons, we meet Tyler's sister Amy, who is a cop...a crooked cop who with her brother has made a deal with the demons. Tyler and Amy feed em and they clean up the mess. In return, well you'll see why they do what they do at thee end. Amy and her cop partner also have a deal with the underground vampirey demons. They get to eat the wasteoids and degenerates and they turn a blind eye and score some loot. As much as we accompany Tyler on his little journey, I'd have rather just watched his sister be the star of the movie. She is a cheating whore who steals, kills and get this....is a loving mom. Wow, what a character. In no way is Amy anybody you would remotely want to root for, which is why you'd want to see what she would do next.
Instead we follow Tyler who then rents the apt to Donna, a southern belle whose on the run. They share a few karoake laughs and soon she discovers the real "tenants" of the building. But the humans in this film are instilled to be the "straight guy". It's the monsters who should be carrying the laughs. And unfortunately they come across as retarded.
The Lorne looking monster is goofy and does a majority of the kills. A yuppie couple, a couple of annoying cops and a jealous boyfriend. Their ultimate demises is summed up in Halloween body part gags.
There a few gags that gag away. An infomercial was quite cute as is a few throwaway one liners.
I could see what Hyde was attempting to do in so far as making the laughs Munsters like and giving you a few ha ha's of Satanic rituals gone awry. The movie is definitely low budget, but shot in nice HD. The special effects have that LSD effect to em and indeed a drinking game was invented for the flick to capitalize on monster teeth and gratuitous demon vanishes.
I think my biggest gripe was that I just didn't care for Tyler, the lovable lump who has the unfortunate job of being the monster janitor rather than the landlord. As I said before, I'd have rather have seen the sister being evil (and by the end seems more than likely) and how she juggled being a corrupt cop, a cheating MILF, a mommy and her dealings with the monster underground.
But then if that was the movie....it wouldn't be called the Landlord.
Gore-ipedia
Bat splurge Neck trauma Intenstine surgery
Nude-ipedia
Zippo
WTF moment The sister going nuts
The Jaded Viewer's Final Prognosis
I think the Landlord would have worked better as a sketch comedy rather than a feature. It's has all the elements of something to see on stage than in a movie theatre. I applaud Hyde's efforts to go full force on a undertaking of making a horror comedy. It's not easy. Some would say they'd go to hell than attempt it. Kudos to Hyde to avoiding hell and making the attempt.
Thanks to Mr. Hyde on sending me a screener of the movie.
Indie horror is alive and kickin. And straight from the jaded viewer mailbox comes this little doozy of a horror comedy, The Landlord.
Here be the plot:
The Landlord is the story of Tyler, the unfortunate young owner of a demon-haunted apartment building. Finding tenants has never been a problem for Tyler, though he does have trouble keeping them alive to pay rent. No matter how nicely Tyler asks the demons not to eat the renters (or to at least wait a month or two), they never listen. And why should they? As far as the demons are concerned, humans are merely dumb, tasty animals - kinda like chickens - and Tyler is their pet monkey.
But all that might change when Tyler takes a liking to the newest tenant, a desperate young woman running from demons of her own…
Looks alot like the TV series Angel with the monster makeup palooza and Shaun of the Dead.
You know what we Americans do best? Make a frakin kick ass zombie film.
Score another one for the US of A. USA! USA!
Gregg Bishop's uber indie Dance of Dead rivals Shaun of the Dead's silliness, blends in some 80s Return of the Dead for the millienial age and clicks in some Buffy-logue to boot. It's amazing nobody ever thought to make Buffy but with zombies.
It's a blender of geekiness heroes without the superpowers and makes the sci fi club cool.
And so Dance of the Dead entertainment value has inappropriate language, gore and scenes of violence. Huuuuaaaaaaaa!
Boring Plot-O-Matic
A high school prom is unexpectedly interrupted when a graveyard, next to a nuclear power plant, becomes the sudden source of resuscitated cadavers. As zombies march on the high school, a motley group of dateless teenage outcasts take on the zombies and save the day.
Awesome Review-O-Matic
Geeks are 8.7 on the coolness meter. Maybe you didn't get the memo. So our rag tag group of misfits all have that Buffy-ish character mish mash to them. Jimmy our detention anarchist (ala Buffy) and his girl sqeuaky clean Lindsey (Angel?) are joined by Gwen (our Cordelia like cheerleader) and Steven the Xander in love with her.
We got some Willows as well in the form of our Sci Fi club (Jules, George and Rod) and a Giles in the embodiment of a redneck coach. A pseudo Blink 182 band (Dingoes ate my Baby anyone?) complete our contingent. All seem in their dance-verse element, meshing in with their own uniqueness, which I have to say would have been trouble if we the audience didn't like our heroes and heroines.
This is definitely millenial zombie movie for the Generation Y universe. And its damn good. The quips, dialogue and converfunnies are all relatively timed perfect. Massive zombie horde about to attack? Lets jam out and have a prom dance to remember.
The "gear up" weapons montage echoes Raimi and Romero like homages stay true to the maestro.
It's funny and its proud to be it.
As for the zombies, we've got fast movers, slow movers. Take your pick. They all end up gunshot, bashed in and pummeled into slosh. The gore and splatter are in epic form. If CGI was done, it was not noticeable. Bishop and his crew did their zombie homework.
Like a BTVS episode, its tick tocking and it works well. Dance of the Dead is a tour de force of a zombie comedy done uber cool, and LOLing at all the right moments.
Even George could use some pointers from this flick.
Gore-ipedia (if you want to be shocked don't read)
Zombie bashing in all forms (gunshots, decaps, arm and leg rips, etc.) Ax slicing Spine ripping Gunshot head shots Lots of offsceen crange hijinks
Nude-ipedia (because you like boobies)
Some cheerleader cheering (but full frontal boobies, err nada)
WTF moment
A zombie makeout session. That's a first!
The Jaded Viewer's Final Prognosis
For all the shitty POV zombie flicks and other zombie reimaginings, a Dance of the Dead comes along and blows you away.
It's a horror comedy that establishes a zombie-verse, makes sure we're entertained by our main characters and unleashes slayerville on the undead.
The ending hints on a possible sequel, and Dance will probably spawn mucho zombie-omedies that will not be as clever.
So if your looking for a decent BTVS fix, put down the season 8 comic and watch Dance of the Dead. And you'll see the sci fi club and anarchist cliques in a whole new light.