Showing posts with label joss whedon. Show all posts
Showing posts with label joss whedon. Show all posts

Monday, January 21, 2013

Top 10 Horror Movies of 2012


Well here it is...as always in the middle of January my Top Horror Movies of 2012! Sorry for taking so long to get this posted but I had to catch up on some of the movies I missed this year (yet again) I usually look at other bloggers and horror site's lists and watch the movies that I missed.

This year, there is no #11-20 list. I just didn't see that many movies this year. It was one of those years I just lacked on the horror movie watching as well as the blogging. My apologies for the low number of posts this year. I know many people use what I post here to see movies I recommend and what they missed. I promise I'll try to be better this year.

My list has few movies that have appeared on others but I do put a spin on the order. I had a different take on what was considered "the best" this  year and my picks are totally abnormal from everybody else. I'm just quirky that way.

First some fun facts and sidenotes!
  • Though some of these movies came out in 2011, I label any movie that got  wide releases or DVD releases in 2012 as coming out in 2012.

  • It's a mix of indie horror and theatrical releases but mostly indies.

  • I missed seeing some theatrical and indie horror movies but you have to rank what you saw so that's what I'm doing.

  • The top 10 films broken down by country: USA = 5, UK=2, Canada=1, Australia=1, Spain=1, 

  • The 10 films broken down by spinkick rating: 4 spinkicks=3, 3 and 1/2 spinkicks= 3, 3 spinkicks=4
  • There are a record 4 spinkick movies on this list!

  • A movie that had 4 spinkicks doesn't necessarily mean it was better.

  • To read the entire review of the film click on the title.

So what did 2012 offer us in the world of horror?

  • This list is dominated by independent horror films (again)

  • In a twist, there are no movies from the Pacific
  • Sequels and remakes dominated Hollywood yet again...and I'm fuckin bored of it.

  • Everybody has Cabin in the Woods on their lists.

  • The number one movie on my list is from the USA for the second straight year!!! (can you believe it???)

I take it some of picks will lead to WTF faces and "you're fuckin crazy". Isn't that the fun of these year end Top 10s? Let's get to the list! Here are some honorable mentions.

The Walking Dead (Season 3): Loved the first half of S3.
The Dead: Great African zombie film.
I missed a lot of great mainstream and indie horror films this year. I hope to get caught up soon.

OK now on to the list!


10.) V/H/S (3 spinkicks)

VHS somehow pulls off what amounts to a mega punch in the stomach. 5 segments, each directed by a film veteran are wrapped around a plot of a group of kids looking for a mysterious VHS tape in a seemingly creepy house. Though not all the shorts are great, each one is solid and creative enough to put you on the edge of your seat. The shaky cam will get you reaching for the Dramamine and the acting is highly questionable. Think Troma stiffboardines.
But aside from it's drawbacks (another being which short would anchor the ending) it delivers on a promise of being a "back to the roots" kind of underground horror. Splashes of monsters, home invasion, Paranormal Activity phenomenon are just a few of the things you'll see. But the overall theme seemed to be douchebags getting their comeuppance. We all like seeing drunk, horny, misogynistic miscreant fuck ups getting slaughtered by the obvious vixen in the bottle and VHS delivers just that.

VHS is a feel good throwback to an 80s style grindhouse. Gore and nudity, the staples of any horror breakfast are plentiful and wrapped around in stories that will make every horror fan smirk and applause with delight.




9.) [Rec] 3 Genesis (3 spinkicks)

Rec 3 is clearly the lull before the storm. I'm hoping  Jaume Balaguero will go all out crazy with Rec Apocalypse to end this series on a good note. Most horror fans, bloggers and critics are caught in the middle with Rec 3 as it pulls into a totally different direction than the first 2. But you have to admit, from the traditional filmmaking and the POV mixed in and a wedding day that you won't soon forget it really does pack some line dancing hilarity and oozes kegs of blood.

I think the fun in Rec 3 is mixing those two together and somehow the series feels Rec-ish but has something new to offer. At 120 minutes, it's not like we had scenes of drawn out nothingness. Everything in Rec 3 is paced with some scares and funions, the acting is delightful and the gore and splatter are plentiful.

What's not to like? Thank goodness they didn't start dancing Gangnam Style. I would have just shut the movie off right then and there.






8.) Maniac (Remake 2012) (3 spinkicks)

 Maniac is a far departure of the normal horror movies in the indie circuit. It's a brutal and relentless 90 minute first person point of view of a slasher doing slasher things. With it's POV gimmick, it clearly forces you to LOOK directly at the horrific kills without a cutaway. It's this forced perspective that during the course of the movie makes you in every way live the life of Frank, our intrepid killer. The horror he creates is far from playing a Call of Duty game. It's realistically sickening and oddly sympathetic as Elijah Wood's performance transcends the Joe Spinnell one in an American Psycho sorta way.

Once you get over the fact it's a remake that follows the originals story, the POV hitch, and that it takes place in Los Angeles (say what?) it is a unique piece of horror cinema. I was shocked by how it made me care about this misogynistic motherfucker, his past and his longing for companionship. From it's shocking opening  to it's WTF ending, you can't ignore Maniac's rawness of bring a serial killer movie into a whole new level.





7.) Kill List (3 spinkicks)

On the surface, Kill List looks to be your standard five and dime crime thriller. Underworld goons doing their trade eliminating threats for $$. But as I thought about the film after watching it, you start seeing the layers underneath Kill List that enable you to see a movie that has more than meets the eye.

Kill List is a film that slowly burns you into a look into the life of a retired hit man and scopes out a world where his past, his present and his future all collide into an orgy of madness. It's an interesting journey seeing a drama, gore soaked slaughter and a Wicker Man-ish horror flick all blended into one. Sure there is a twist at the end and numerous unanswered questions which make you go WTF but it stills hit you harder than a hail of bullets.

What you'll get from Kill List is a character study of a soldier turned assassin who elects to try to live as a normal but it seems PTSD and pure conditioning to kill are not as easy to shut down when you get home. There is pure hell to pay for the sins of your past and it seems mysterious forces want have molded our hit man's world into their own.

Kill List is a solid flick that may seem like Pulp Fiction without the glitz and glamour. And for that it gets high marks for showing me a touch of all the genres I love from the UK.





6.) Excision (3 spinkicks)

In Excision, Richard Bates debut film based on his short, a coming of age story on a volcano of WTF. Delusional and dreamlike, Excision is suburban America macabre, weirdness with a smile and a bloody mouth. It feels American Mary-ish but less grown up. Which isn't really a bad thing. I would say it would be this years The Woman, where we see the suburban darkness in a Tim Burton like universe.


Excision is that little film that questions our American values and whether or not we can find happiness in who we are and whether or not we can do it while were a little bit crazy.

Underneath the prototypical family is a world we don't necessarily see. Everybody is a bit crazy, has dreams that would make the most alpha male cringe but we hide those feelings and those thoughts deep into the trenches of our brain.

Some people let it all out and show the world who they really are. So who's really normal huh?






5.)  I Am A Ghost (4 spinkicks)

 Mendoza's I Am a Ghost is a slow burn ghost story that channels all the suspense of Kubrick film and releases it's madness Ti West style. You have to admire a film that throwsback to a cinematic style of vintaginess and still delivers. Add the fact the entire movie is centrally focused on one character, Emily (Anna Ishida) and in one setting, an old Victorian house and it's a bit risky endeavor. But that's why indie horror is a frontier. You'll never know if it will work if you don't try right?

I Am a Ghost plays with the viewer, forcing a WTF in every brief but cryptic scene until it slowly lets you in on the secrets that plague our dear Emily. Like a non linear jigsaw puzzle, all the pieces begin to make sense as the picture progresses (the eggs!!!) and once you see the entirety of the film, it's quite a sight to behold. It's full of chilling moments, superb acting and a twizzer twist on the ghost genre.

Mendoza's story could easily draw comparisons to The Sixth Sense, The Others and The Innkeepers but that would be a disservice. What this film does is create a sense of dread, hopelessness and mystery and reveals a young woman's disturbing secret has not been eliminated in death. It's a journey through a photographic album of a life that was full of hardship and pain, where our instinctive nature to see a happy ending won't be answered. The very nature of the ghost story is that it is suppose to scare you. But here we are in a comforting role though the scares do come in a frenetic ending.






4.)  John Dies at the End (3 spinkicks)

John Dies at the End is all that is great with indie horror cinema. It's full of wacky and memorable characters and every scene oozes more WTF from the last. It is Bill and Ted but for horror fans. The premise is so kooky, it's like you're seeing a mental patients wet dream. What JDATE does is really smack you with 80s horror ingenuity, spew out comedic literature a mile a minute while making sure you have no idea what's going to happen next.

It's really a fun horror comedy that is this year's Tucker and Dale. Dave and John (our main protagonists) are a dynamic duo who tackle apocalyptic evil in a most hilarious way possible. I had a feeling John Dies would be on my Top 10 list of 2012.

Once I finished seeing it, I knew exactly where to put it. 

It's one of the best movies of 2012 as it hits all the right notes on how effective indie horror can be when you can take the source material and be faithful to the essence of why it's a cult classic. Yes John Dies will be the strangest horror movie you will see this year. But it's the drug you need to take.






3.) The Loved Ones (4 spinkicks)

The Loved Ones is the perfect combination of sour and sweet. One moment your seeing all  hell break bloody loose and the next you're watching the nostalgia of prom night. It's the two perspectives on a special night, one that is awkwardly normal and the other straight out of a bizarro horror world. Our protagonist Brent gets the latter and it's been a while since I openly rooted for our final guy to get his revenge served cold.

This is the movie horror fans will call a cult classic and the ones horror fans will recommend to their causal movie fan friends. Prom has always had hijinky and quirky moments. That pesky virginity has to be lost. But you also grow up on that special night. In horror terms, you survive and that's all that counts.


Whatever you may think, The Loved Ones cements what I love about horror movies. Sometimes watching over an hour of hardcore horror is way too much. Intersperse it with scenes of juvenile American Pie jokes and it lessens the eye strain. The way the Loved Ones completes its plot and story arc make it feel like you watched a damn good stand alone episode of Carrie but Australian.

We'll get our prom gone all fucked up this year when Carrie goes all telekinetic, but if you want your fix now, I highly recommend you watch The Loved Ones as soon as you can. It's as good as getting a hole in your head.






2.) American Mary (4 spinkicks)

American Mary is without a doubt one of the best movies of 2012. It is a dissection into the world of body modification that takes a wrong, dreadful turn for the worst. Full of long lasting scenes of female empowerment taken to the limits, it is by far the most powerful, stylized and slickest look into one woman's journey from hopeful optimism to a revenge served cold despotism. The Soska Sisters have created a horror film that is light years ahead of their previous effort. With American Mary, they give us a Joss Whedon like character study into Mary (Katharine Isabelle), who we will see grow up and find her place in the world after experiencing severe trauma.

Never have I seen a movie that delves into this subculture, treats it respectfully and slices in a perfect horror movie inside. I guarantee American Mary will etch it's way into cult status. It's perfect blend of sly black humor, absurd and eerie characters and torturous scenes of pain and agony that equal a milkshake of cult awesomeness.

Horror movies have just grown up in a big way thanks to American Mary.



And the #1 Horror Movie of 2012 is...........






1.) The Cabin in the Woods (4 spinkicks)

The Cabin in the Woods is the best horror movie of 2012. To go even further, it probably is the best horror comedy of the last 10 years. My fellow jaded viewers, CITW is better than Scream (sorry Wes) and all its bastard children. Tucker and Dale vs Evil hinted towards a meta aware horror comedy but CITW goes lights years beyond that. Simply and concisely summarized, Cabin is a meta self aware revolutionary horror comedy that takes those structured horror cliches, be it the stereotypical characters, the irrational choices, the set direction and the mythos and goes all man behind the curtain on it.

Joss and Drew go all Wizard of Oz-ing on the horror genre and it's so brilliant, so awesome and so fucking clever you will leave the theater in a state of pure happy happy joy joy bliss and understand why #CabinintheWoodsisEPIC was trending on Twitter. It's a horror reference machine, sending you cameos, trends and cliches a mile a minute and it asks you to get it. Do you get it? Do you understand the parody of what you're seeing? You don't? Then go ask somebody. Go watch the Universal classics, the slasher franchises, the Kubrick masterpiece. Then you'll understand why Cabin is going to spawn it's own genre and some bastard children of it's own.

The Cabin in the Woods will be remembered as a game changer in the world of horror. It's a horror movie within the making of a horror movie. The Whedon elements are pure mythological magic, where he introduces something new to an audience that has long forgotten or chosen to forget why we all love the horror genre.

Goddard and Whedon break down into the slasher formula and ask the questions we've all asked before, during and after the movie. We've always questioned character motivations, absurd coincidences, elaborate backstory and heroic save the day moments but never has it been put in a movie so brilliantly and with such style and and LOL zingers.

A new generation of millennials has now been introduced us to the topsy turvy world of Hellmouth 101.

****************************************************
OK, I know you fellow jaded viewers have your opinions and your own lists. So go ahead and let me know what your top 10 is and what other flicks I may have excluded. Chime in and let me know what you think.

This list of the Top 20 Horror Movies of 2012 also is an opportunity to see the movies you may have missed that made many of the best of 2012 within the horror community. We all missed a few flicks here and there. I hope you all give all of these movies a chance and then come back and let me know what's the what.

The Jaded Viewer Related Linkage

Monday, April 16, 2012

The Cabin in the Woods (Review)

The Cabin in the Woods

The Cabin in the Woods (2012)

Directed by Drew Goddard
Written by Drew Goddard and Joss Whedon

The Cabin in the Woods was suppose to come out on February 5th 2010. It didn't. The poster and trailer were released December of last year. We had to wait 2+ years for this to come out. As a hoarder and fanboy of all that is Whedon, I was getting annoyed and was losing any hope that this movie was ever going to be released. They delayed it to 3D it. Joss and Drew cried foul. Would we ever see this???

And yes we all would. But as April 13th approached, I knew Cabin would be my must see movie of the year. I was having Whedon withdrawal and even though he was giving us Avengers, it was mainstream Joss. With CITW, we were getting vintage Joss. Teamed with Drew Goddard (a Buffy/Angel alum writer/director) we were going to get the answer to that age old question...

"What would happen if Joss Whedon (and Drew Goddard) wrote a horror movie?"

And beyond my wildest expectations, The Cabin in the Woods is the best horror movie of 2012. To go even further, it probably is the best horror comedy of the last 10 years. My fellow jaded viewers, CITW is better than Scream (sorry Wes) and all its bastard children. Tucker and Dale vs Evil hinted towards a meta aware horror comedy but CITW goes lights years beyond that.

Simply and concisely summarized, Cabin is a meta self aware revolutionary horror comedy that takes those structured horror cliches, be it the stereotypical characters, the irrational choices, the set direction and the mythos and goes all man behind the curtain on it. Joss and Drew go all Wizard of Oz-ing on the horror genre and it's so brilliant, so awesome and so fucking clever you will leave the theater in a state of pure happy happy joy joy bliss and understand why #CabinintheWoodsisEPIC was trending on Twitter.

It's a horror reference machine, sending you cameos, trends and cliches a mile a minute and it asks you to get it. Do you get it? Do you understand the parody of what you're seeing? You don't? Then go ask somebody. Go watch the Universal classics, the slasher franchises, the Kubrick masterpiece. Then you'll understand why Cabin is going to spawn it's own genre and some bastard children of it's own.

Boring Plot-O-Matic

Five friends go for a break at a remote cabin in the woods, where they get more than they bargained for. Together, they must discover the truth behind the cabin in the woods.

Awesome Review-O-Matic

Of course, the movie is about 5 friends who go to a cabin in the woods. But in the opening scene (in classic Whedon fashion) the twist which is SUPPOSE to be in the middle of the film is the one that starts you off. Any way of plot points and spoilers will ruin the movie for you so I will now not mention much of it (like CTK @ Planet of Terror did in his review). What I will do is answer my standard Q&A when I review a slasher film (because I'm jack full of spaz tuna) and also go in a bonus round, let's cyberchat in the comments. Go, go gadget Q&A!

1.) Does the movie have..... a mysterious, insanely strong, ridiculed as a child, deformed, inbred redneck slasher?

Check...and it has so much more that I'm getting giddy and a horror boner talking about it.

2.) Gratuitous, over the top, super fleshy nudity?

Check. Rated R motherfucker. They're real and they're spectacular.

3.) Stereotypical teenage caricatures with a few old people who die gruesome and horrific over the top deaths?

Check. A blonde bimbo slut, a stoner "fool", the dumb jock, the smart guy and your standard prepackaged final "virgin" girl. Oh how you will howl with laughter at Fran Kranz's performance as Marty, the stoner. He spews Whedon-logue as good as Xander Harris.

4.) No Plot?

It's really a trick question as of course there is a plot and it's fuckin awesome. When you drank a can of New Coke, you know it's just a version of the original formula. Oh how I love the original formula. Classic Coke with a twist of sassy.

5.) Kills by our slasher that make you go "Fuck yeah!"

Check. You will yell out in delight and make a mess in your pants. You will see a lot of fanboy O faces.

6.) Gore, lots of it. Like serious decapitation, dismemberment, impalement, hatchet frenzy steroid rages and blood shooting out at various penetration wounds, limbs a flailing and mindless splatter and mayhem?

Check. There are LOL scenes of WTF by the various "things". The blood and splatter are top notch. Lots of everything I said above with a point that may impale your brain. Hint hint.

7.) Geeky leader who takes charge of the hapless group as they try to escape who befriends the hot girl who knows about the "legend" (there's always a legend no one believes)

Wow. Joss get out of my head. This describes our stoner Marty to a tee. Though the legend is more of the "Here is what the fuck is going on" to his friends and the audience. Marty is using is sight beyond sight. That's the real power of weed.

8.) Funny yet ill timed dialogue but also various quips and one liners that are funny only the first time around (yet somehow funny again when you buy the DVD and only when you're stoned)

Check. The Whedonesque dialogue complete with Buffy speak is as always fuckin brilliant. Sure, "teenagers" are spewing dialogue written by 30 and 40 somethings but it has always worked when done by the Whedon players. The jokes are spot on timely and hilariously LOL. The play on words and reverse logic make it all the more fun. It's dialogue and conversation that is probably written in a conventional way and then Whedon-ized to make it funny. Remember, Joss actually talks like this.

9.) Gratuitous cameos of horror legends (a famous man of the box, classic Universal monsters, Kubrick tweens) that make you flash a metal sign and do the Beavis and Butthead pseudo head nodding.

Check. SPOILER ALERT!!! This link here will give you all the info you need.

9a.) Final girl goes all final girly?

Check. But it's the final girl we see at the end playing "Le Director" that you'll be cheering for.

10.) Wildly ambiguous ending that can be used to warrant a sequel?

Actually...well.....ummm....no?

************************************************************
The Cabin in the Woods will be remembered as a game changer in the world of horror. It's a horror movie within the making of a horror movie. The Whedon elements are pure mythological magic, where he introduces something new to an audience that has long forgotten or chosen to forget why we all love the horror genre.

Goddard and Whedon break down into the slasher formula and ask the questions we've all asked before, during and after the movie. We've always questioned character motivations, absurd coincidences, elaborate backstory and heroic save the day moments but never has it been put in a movie so brilliantly and with such style and and LOL zingers.

A new generation of millennials has now been introduced us to the topsy turvy world of Hellmouth 101.

Nude-ipedia

A spectacular pair of mangoes

Gore-ipedia

Mucho slaughter via slasher weaponry
Mucho victim fodder via various slasher methodology

WTF moment


SPOILER ALERT!!! (scroll over to see)
----> (I'll never see unicorns the same again)

The Jaded Viewer's Final Prognosis

The Cabin in the Woods is clearly the film to beat as best horror movie of 2012. So many Buffy/Angel/Dollhouse alum I was oozing Whedonesque Fanboy-isms like a motherfucker. Everybody go see this movie. NOW. Drop what you're doing and see it now. Why are you still reading this?

Rating:


Check out the trailer.



Wednesday, December 07, 2011

The Cabin in the Woods (Trailer)

Look at that release date from the poster. Hahahaha. It was suppose to come out 2 years ago! It's not surprising as The Cabin in the Woods was filmed in 2009. Director Drew Goddard with co-writer Joss Whedon had me salivating at this movie but it totally disappeared when MGM went bye bye.

Here be the plot:

“A group of five friends going on a quiet cabin retreat scratch the surface of something so massive and horrific that they can only begin to fathom what might possibly be going on just as time quickly runs out.”

Starring Chris Hemsworth (pre-Thor) and Whedon favorites Amy Acker (Fred!) and Fran Kranz (Topher!) I have to say I'm kinda psyched for this. Kranz looks to play final guy and can recite Whedon lines in his sleep.

And WTF is the weird invisible forcefield and unseen tech angle in all this??? Whedon is my Master now and if he wrote this, it can't disappoint. No fuckin way. Check out the trailer and share your thoughts.






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Thursday, March 03, 2011

The Buffy Comic Giveaway Contest Winner is....


I'd like to thank everyone who participated in The Jaded Viewer's Buffy Comic Giveaway! I can't believe I got so many entries to this contest when I was only expecting maybe a dozen or so. Obvious nobody got the list of Big Bads wrong (you're all so Xander smart!) but the puns were priceless and I shared a few of them in the comments on the original post. Be sure to check them out.

Here's a couple of my favorites based on the clip below.

Here's mine:
"I'd like a Double Medley Burger, small fries and a dusted vamp to go please"
And here are your punny puns.

"Every time I pull out the stake, they make with the shock and the awww. Maybe I really do need a nametag."

Vampire:" You fight like a barbarian you prissy little......." (death stab)

"One vampire stake, extra dusty."


"Got wood? I do....wait, that didn't come out right."

"Sorry, all out of A1."

"No neck-sucking on face-suckers for you."

*After defeating 3 vampires*
"Well that was the worst Foursome ever."

"Well that's it. 3 spikes and I'm out."

"Oh C'mon, these teenagers fooling around have more endurance than that!"

*pulls stake out* : "two company"
*stakes vamp* "Three's a crowd"

If you came up with a pun, you got an extra entry into the contest.




And finally a special thanks to Whedonesque for the plug!

OK enough stalling. The winner of The Jaded Viewer Buffy Comic Giveaway Contest is.........

Chelsea from California!

Congrats Chelsea and thanks for participating. I'll be having more giveaways and I have another Buffy Comic Book to giveaway soon.

So check back real soon. Thanks to you all for making this an awesome contest!

Friday, January 21, 2011

Giveaway Contest: Win Buffy the Vampire Slayer, S8 Volume 1 Comic Book!

I haven't had a contest in a while and I really never had anything good to giveaway. But with all this talk of a new Buffy remake coming out, I realized this would be the perfect contest for 2011.

So here's the deal. You're going to have to be a little creative to win. Below is a clip of Buffy dusting a vampire. If you're any kind of Buffy fan, you know she always has a nice witty quip or pun she says after she stakes a vamp. This one is:

"Three in one night, Giles would be so proud"




**UPDATE**

I'm changing this up a bit. There are 2 ways you can enter this contest to win 1 copy of Buffy the vampire Slayer, Season 8 Volume 1 entitled "The Long Way Home". Contest will run until the end of February. US only residents.

1.) I want you to come up with your most creative vampire comeback, pun or quip based upon the video above.

AND/OR

2.) Answer the question below.

Name the "Big Bad" from each of the 7 Seasons of BTVS.

Once you come up with your cleverly clever quip or name the Big Bads, e-mail or DM your name and e-mail address with your answers. Around March, I'll randomly pick a winner! If you do both, you get entered twice and double your chances!

E-mail: jadedviewers at yahoo dot com
Twitter: @jadedviewer
Facebook: the jaded viewer

Now channel your inner Joss Whedon and get with the punning.

Thanks to Whedonesque for the plug!


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Tuesday, June 01, 2010

Get your kumbayaya's out! (BTVS Musical variations)

I'm joining in the festivities over at Gore Gore Dancer as Aleata Illusion proclaims it Buffy week this week. (its good I didn't participate with The Spiral Downward to Irrevelancy of Sarah Michelle Gellar post) I've been rewatching some seasons over again and I recently got to the musical episode in Season 6.

"Once More with Feeling" is indeed a precursor to Joss Whedon's Dr. Horrible's Sing Along web short. It's got some great musical numbers with the notables being Tara's "Under Your Spell" and Buffy's "Through the Fire". I'll even say "I'll Never Tell" featuring the duo of a Xander and Anya is pretty sweet too.

But the craze this episode started after it aired and even continues today is the number of stage plays/musicals and final school art projects its spawned. Seriously this is some uber Buffy nerdo stuff here. From us Americans to the Brits to the French to the Aussies, we love our Buffy musical and we love to karoakey it to death.

Mind you, some of these are bleeding ears bad and others are actually pretty yabba dabba doo. Here are a few examples. First the big super crappy burgers.

the jaded viewer says: It's "I'll Never Tell" where the actors/singers are not even in costume and just seems like they never even watched the episode as they don't perform the little nuances associated with the characters.




the jaded viewer says: This Portland, OR version isn't too bad.. This send up of "I've Got A Theory" is actually tolerable.




the jaded viewer says: Sometimes there is one good singer in the troupe while the others are mediocre. Take for instance this one. The Buffy singer is super duper. This is a final school project featuring "Walk through the Fire"




the jaded viewer says:OK lots of big Buffy fans getting their kumbabyayas out. Some people don't even look like Buffy like in this UK version of "Going Through the Motions"




So what have we learned? There are alot of Buffy fans who love doing this musical. I kinda think its glued to the fact when that Super Mario Bros live action sketch went viral everybody copied that.

In any case, the musical is damn catchy and ranks as one of the best BTVS episodes ever. Now the best version is the original and below is a making of that episode.

Here's a making of the Buffy musical.




Well that was magically delicious wasn't it? So what are your thoughts on the Buffy musical episode? Like it? Dislike it? Want to make a version where I play Xander? In any case, for more Buffy fun head over to Gore Gore Dancer for some awesome Buffy posts this week.

Monday, February 01, 2010

Dollhouse Series Finale "Epitaph 2: The Return" (Review)

My previous reviews of the last 6 episodes can be found on UGO.com:
And like that.....it was gone

“The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world he did not exist. And like that... he was gone.”

Will anybody remember that a show called Dollhouse aired on TV for 2 seasons on Fox? Probably not. In the not so distant future we may have a few people who will recall something about a show with imprinted personalities, but like a reality star celebrity, those will disappear from the public consciousness in a nano second.

But like Echo remembering a fallen Paul in the series finale, I’ll remember. Though Dollhouse is not the caliber of Joss Whedon previous efforts, Dollhouse will be Whedon’s 4th best show on his TV resume. It had its moments of action, Zen and humor but will somehow be remembered as a return to TV that was over hyped, full of ratings disaster and ultimately cut short. My gut feeling is that we won’t see the end of Whedon from TV, but instead we’ll get a self imposed hiatus that will last what will seem like an eternity to us Whedon is our Master fanatics.

So what did Dollhouse bring us in its series finale Epitaph 2: The Return? Lots of closure in a sense without the closing credit “Where are they now?” text. But it seems most of Epitaph 2 was full of relationships that somehow were neatly bow tied for us die hards to consume. It’s a very disjointed series finale where if it were *gasp* 2 hours, maybe we’d see the end of some monumental storylines. These include Boyd and Clyde 2.0 as the Big Bads being completely ignored as well as how the tech got in the hands of evil. But Joss decided that, like all his shows the storyline and overarching plot were not the important aspects of the show. He focused on the characters and that’s where we break it down.

Mag and Zone

Mag (Felicia Day) and Zone (Zach Ward) reprise their roles in the post apocalyptic mind wiped world from Epitaph One. With little mini Caroline in tow they are captured, sent to Neuropolis (originally Tucson) and thus get to meet la resistance. The glimpses of this future make Book of Eli look realistic. Cities look like Detroit and the public are acting as if American Idol just got cancelled.

But throughout this episode Mag and Zone become full members of the resistance. Felicia Day gives a top notch performance and probably should have been a regular on the show as her screen presence is Dr. Horrible awesome. It’s a fitting conclusion for these 2 and if we could rewind, Epitaph One SHOULD have been the pilot and we could have had flash forwards seeing there future with the Dollhouse present. That would have been a better direction to go.

Sierra and Victor

Our Xander and Anya couple are having career choice marital problems in this episode. Sierra/Priya is raising their son little Tony in a non tech utopia while Victor/Tony is now a full fledge member of the Tech head Mad Max Road warriors (complete with NFL shoulder pads and techy jewelry). As both go and make the road trip to help the resistance, Victor makes the choice his comrades don’t want to. He abandons the tech that’s made them Six million dollar specials and reunites with his wife and son.

Dichen Lachman and Enver Gjokaj have been the unsung heroes of the show and whatever conflict they had gets easily resolved with less than adequate screen time. Gjokaj’s performances in Season 2 have been stellar (most notably his “Topher”) and Lachman in a scene with Eliza Dushku gives her best performance.

It’s a family reunion for these misfits of science.

Adelle and Topher

Adelle and Topher play the rather obvious mom and son relationship to the max here. It’s been subtle but both Olivia Williams and Fran Kranz have done their best to keep it that way. Topher is cuckoo crazy but his genius brain invents the tech to cure all the Actives and revert them back to the way they were. But it’s Williams as Adelle that plays mommy to Topher, consoling him and shouldering some of the burden he has gone through. Topher has been my favorite character on the show (as he’s the most nerdy and pop culture savvy of the cast) and here he turns all Dr. Sam Beckett serious to leap from life to life, fixing what went wrong. Dying in an explosion with his deux ex machina tech he recites to Adelle before he activates it and says: “I don’t want to cause anymore pain”. His death, one of 2 in this episode, hit me the hardest.

Echo and Paul

What didn’t hit me hard was Paul’s very abrupt death in a lackluster gun battle. Tahmoh Penikett’s Paul Ballard had many changes to his character that I just decided not to care anymore. From dedicated rogue FBI agent, to Echo’s Handler, there just seemed to be too much two face in Paul. Adding to the fact that so much time was dedicated to the innuendo of Echo and Ballard that it was somewhat surprising to see a scene dedicated to Echo mourning his untimely death. Eliza Dushku for the first time shows off a very emotional performance as she comes to grips with her lonely life.

Paul tells Echo that she really hasn’t opened up to him since they’ve been together and than seeing her feel guilt for not telling him how she felt was witnessing the evolution of Echo. Dushku had often played Echo as Buffy but without the emotional baggage. Here we finally see Echo “feel” human. In the final ultimate last scene, Echo is united with Paul via an imprint wedge and they finally are together (well in her mind anyway) and the last shot is Echo sleeping in the Dollhouse bunk, smiling.

Miscellaneous Tidbits of Bits

Alan Tudyk makes a cameo as Alpha, now a resistance member who fashions the Dollhouse back the way it was. Summer Glau also cameos via video footage so that Topher can say goodbye. Maurissa Tancharoen played Kilo, one of Victor’s Road Warrior tech heads. She is married to Jed Whedon and was also a writer on Dollhouse.

It’s time for a one final treatment

Epitaph 2: The Return resulted in some world saving, some families reunited, some unfortunate sacrifices and true love for one. It’s far from a perfect series finale but more of a dedication to Joss Whedon to the fanbase that the characters of the show are what matters most. Whedon didn’t want us to speculate on the fate of our characters and we should be thankful we got closure on all of them.

In the end, Dollhouse will be remembered as a show that took an idea from Eliza and Joss, evolved it and brought back one of the geniuses of modern day TV back to the medium. However, even a genius can make something that backfires. What started out as a good idea turned into a total misfire. Hey, ask Topher Brink about that. He knows exactly how Joss Whedon feels.

Tuesday, January 12, 2010

Dollhouse "Getting Closer (TV Review)

If you've been an avid reader of this blog, you know I've been reviewing Dollhouse for UGO.com. Well that's sadly coming to a close as the series is down to 2 more episodes after this one. It's funny that now, Dollhouse is getting uber awesome, packing in characters that I adore and plot twists that have you scratching your head and high fiving at the same time, its all coming to an end.

I NEED MY WHEDON!!! HE IS MY MASTER NOW!!


So over the next few weeks, I'm going in depth-y and will splurge my thoughts, theories and overall excitement for Dollhouse.

You can read my latest review over at UGO.com for the episode "Getting Closer".

P.S. I had a nerdgasm when Amy Acker, Eliza Dushku, Summer Glau, Dichen Lachman and Liza Lapira all appeared in this episode. Yummy.

Tuesday, December 15, 2009

Dollhouse (Reviews of the last 4 episodes)

I've been a little mainstreamy this week and I really don't know why. Well actually I do. December is the month where I try to catch up on all my Hollywood horror movie viewing so I can create a solid Top 10 horror movies of 2009 list. So I've been trying to view all the stuff I missed or is being released on DVD.

But I've been tubing it up as well. If you haven't noticed, I'm a big Joss Whedon fan and I've been reviewing Dollhouse for UGO.com. I've reviewed every single Dollhouse episode (except Epitaph One). I really admit, I'm proud of the fact that I haven't missed reviewing a single episode. Trust me, there were times the show was out right terri-awful, I had no motivation to do it.

If you're a Dollhouse fan, you can check out my reviews of the last 4 episodes by heading over to UGO.com.

Friday, November 13, 2009

The Thread: What's your horror movie idea?

It's Friday the 13th! Don't worry, this is not a Friday the 13th retrospective or anything. But I was thinking some of us (the horror bloggers) have watched a great deal of horror flicks. Some of us are even potential filmmakers. We've all said...I can make a better movie than that!

But really, do we actually have better ideas of what a good horror movie could be? Well I think I do. Hopefully nobody steals my idea, but if they do, please give me some damn credit.

Here is my idea for a flick. I got this inspiration after watching Behind the Mask: The Rise of Leslie Vernon (which I ranked #1 in my Top Horror Movies of 2007). I also got some ideas after seeing the teaser posters for Joss Whedon's Cabin in the Woods. As you can tell from my writing style on my reviews and posts and reviewing Dollhouse, I'm a Whedonaniac. I just like the quirky dialogue and the funny convos and the characters he's written and created.

So my idea is a self aware horror film. What's it called?

It's called "Final Girl".

Basically its about a girl who learns how to defeat slashers (she learns her skills from an aging final girl and this is done via a gratuitous 80s montage) and goes from town to town and kills slasher legends who are killing dumb, oversexed and drug smoking teens.

Sounds generic right?

The twist here is she goes undercover, infiltrates the teens that are being stalked and slaughtered and then unleashes her final girl fury. She knows all the tricks of the trade. Like how to survive by not running aimlessly, she doesn't partake in any vices, she does the research necessary to kill the killer, she listens to the crazy old man and she's seen all the things other final girls have done to avoid death and survive.

Sorta like Buffy, but referencing final girls of other horror films, it'll be totally self aware. Possible winks to the audience of what they know. Everybody has written rules on how to survive a horror movie, but our main final girl will know all these rules and written a few of her own.

Obviously the sequel would be "Final Dude".

Well that's my idea. Now, I'm curious as to what yours would be? Do you have an idea for a horror movie or did you actually make a short or feature? If so, what was the story, the idea?

If you don't want to share because you think somebody will steal it...I totally understand. But if you had an idea for a horror movie that you think people would like to hear...please share.

So what's your story idea horror minions?

Tuesday, October 06, 2009

Dollhouse "Instinct" (TV Review)

Well aren't those 2 the cutest little MILFs you ever did see. My bad if I've been subjecting to you reading posts about my Dollhouse reviews for UGO.com. Dollhouse has started off slow but I still believe the show is worth watching (I'm one of 3 people in all of America).

In this episode, Eliza Dushku plays mom and has to protect her baby from the forces of evil. But the beauty of this review, is I've broken it down in Lifetime Movie of the Week segments. You know, women scorn, women revenge, women abuse and women nymphomaniacs.

Check out the entire review by heading to UGO.com's TV Blog.

Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Dollhouse "Vows" (TV Review)

I'm back reviewing Dollhouse for UGO.com. Who knew this series would be back but I'll be reviewing each episode this season as well. Joss Whedon has promised this season would be less Mission-y so I'm ever hopeful we'll get to see what was promised in the unaired Epitaph One.

You can check out my full review of the season premiere "Vows" by heading to UGO.

Monday, May 18, 2009

Fox Renews Dollhouse

Well Fox has officially renewed Dollhouse for another season. So more reviews to come from your friendly, neighborhood jaded viewer for the 2nd season.

You can find out more info by going here.

Tuesday, May 12, 2009

Dollhouse "Omega" (TV Review)

Well this is it. The last episode of Dollhouse for this season.....or *gasp* ever. It's been fun reviewing the show for UGO.com.

As I sit here hoping Dollhouse gets picked up for a 2nd season, I don't know why this show never picked up steam among the masses.

It's a good show, with a cyberpunk scifi-ness to it and filled with quirky dialogue, hot women and kick ass action.

But I guess that wasn't enough.

The finale was sort of lacking any oooomph. It felt like a little kid that wanted one more cookie. Poor kid.

Well check out my final review of the episode "Omega" on UGO.com.

We will miss your super hotness Eliza Dusku. I'm going to miss my favorite faves Sierra and Ivy. And you to Topher. You are frakin funny.

Tuesday, May 05, 2009

Dollhouse "Briar Rose" (TV Review)


Do you need a hint on who is Alpha? It's kinda obvious. If you didn't see this coming a mile away, you really need to study up or head over to Dollhouse Wiki.

We've got 1 episode left so hang on boys and girls, we're about to all kabloomey here. Lots of twisty twizzlers in this one. And we finally see the infamous Big Bad Alpha in action.

Check out my review of "Briar Rose" at UGO.com

Tuesday, April 28, 2009

Dollhouse "Haunted" (TV Review)

[To save on time and effort, I figured I'd post my review of Dollhouse on the jaded viewer early. Enjoy!]

If the Dollhouse gets murdered by the Fox execs, can it be brought back to life? Oddly, with the talk of the DVD and the mysterious “13th episode” being included, the DVD kinda acts like a Dollhousey imprint…right?

So not to worry folks. If Fox does cancel our little awesome-rific show, we can all bring it back to life by buying 2 DVDs each of the show. It’ll be a crazy bestseller which then will force Fox to go all Family Guy rewind and bring the show back to life.

See everything will work out fine. Wait. This is the same network that cancelled Arrested Development and apologized right?

Oh crap. Never mind.

In this week’s episode of the Dollhouse Echo gets the imprint of Adelle’s BFF who was murdered and she has to solve her own death. We also see Topher and his BFF geek out and we see Paul and his BFF the ever sleeping doll, Mellie go boink crazy. It’s BFF-palooza!

Addy and her BFF

The big Riddler question mark this week concerning the human condition in the Dollhouse universe is whether or not the Dollhouse allows people to live forever. As we open the episode, Margaret a super duper rich woman gets murdered while horseback riding. Seems she’s been a client of the Dollhouse and been brain scanning her mind in case something like this happened.

Adelle and Margie are best of friends and though sad at the loss of her friend, Margie needs to find out who killed her. After attending her own funeral, we go all Scooby Doo and we find out who the suspects are.

Could it be….

1.) The womanizing slacker son?
2.) The photographer daughter?
3.) The drunken older brother?
4.) The young, exotic husband?
5.) The staff?


Margie as an imprinted Echo has casual, Wilma like conversations with all of the above. Being careful as to not divulge her true identity, she gets to hear what they really thought of her as a mother, wife and sister.

OK. I gotta chime in here. I know last post I was asking for a standalone, imprint of the week episode so we can lure other viewers to the show. Well you know what? I’m an idiot. That was a bad idea. This is because these types of shows are just boring and muddled. It’s a standard sci-fi premise to explore what would happen if your memories could be transferred to another body when you died.

I mean Star Trek did this a million times.

So nothing new is being explored. We all understand that everybody’s perspectives of you would be different. That people would be more brutally honest about what they thought of you. It’s a gimmick that has been done to death, and then brought back to life by other sci-fi shows. What really more needs to be said? Bad choice here by the writers on crafting this little regurgitated mess of a gimmick.

The debate of using the Dollhouse tech to have people live forever is also sorta clichéd as well. We’ve all heard the same issues regarding cloning and sci-fi movies talk about the morality issues implicit with such a thing.

I just didn’t think the show needed to explore any of these issues. So another episode was wasted by Joss and company. We’re deep in our end zone, in the 4th quarter and it’s 2nd down and long. And this is the big play you come up with?

Arghhh.

I’m an angry emoticon right now. Let’s turn that to a smiley face. So let’s talk about the Topher and his BFF.

Topher and his BFF

In a nice change of pace, Topher has to run an annual “yada yada yada diagnostic” which turns out as we see, that Sierra being imprinted with a geek playmate for Topher for the day. Sierra could probably be the hottest nerdette ever in the history of TV.

So what does Topher do with his Active for a day?

1.) Play Speeforce 3 on Xbox 360
2.) Throw a football and talk about classic sci-fi errors
3.) Play Laser tag

This leads to the quotable of the day as Sierra talks to Topher about having some fun with the Actives. I am positive Jane Espenson wrote this.

Geeky Sierra: Speaking of sci-fi, can we play with the sleepies?
Topher: No.
Geeky Sierra: C’mon Topher. We can have them battle one another and bet on them like Gladiators.
Topher: We can’t play with the sleepies.
Geeky Sierra: Or we could have them act out skits we write, film it and see who gets more hits on YouTube.
Topher: That’s not a bad idea, but no.

I’ve poured over the message boards as well folks trying to figure out who Topher imprinted into Sierra. Some say it’s himself, while others say it’s a geeky “man friend”. The mystery of Topher is he is the single most important person in the Dollhouse. Without him, there is no Dollhouse. DeWitt probably doesn’t even allow him to leave HQ.
As it’s a solitary life for Topher, I’m guessing this little present by Dewitt every year on his birthday is a way to keep the dude happy.

Poor Topher.

I’m sure Ivy is just a geeky BFF when she’s not getting him snacks and juice boxes. I’m telling you, these kids are the next Xander and Anya. Get them together.

Good comic relief for all us nerdy Whedonheads who love the word party, pop culture dial-licious dialogue.

Paul and his BFF

Paul Ballard has a lot on his mind. We know he knows Mellie is an Active and that’s complicated his relationship. He and Mellie are just out of synced. And we all know why.

Ballard (still in Dollhouse case mode) has Mellie’s fingerprints run through the FBI database. As it mysteriously gets erased, he convinces his colleague that something isn’t right. Yay. A converted dollhouse believer.

When Mellie starts to tell Ballard how she feels and is in love with him, our man Paul goes into rough sex mode and goes all hot and heavy with her.

It’s obvious what’s going on with Paul. His gritty boink session with Mellie is his way of expressing he is a “client” with a doll. He can’t actually have a relationship with her anymore because she is one of the “kidnapped” Dollhouse victims he’s trying to save.

I’m not sure where they’re going to go with Mellie but I’m going to go all Nostradamus here and predict Mellie/November is going to die.

Yes I said it. She will die in the season (series?) finale.

That will push Paul over the edge and become a rogue Dollhouse hunter. It’s all about the recycled Whedon show plot lines to keep us tuned ya know?
Addy and her BFF (the conclusion)

So as Margie goes all interrogationy on everyone, we all get potential motives and scenarios on making each of our suspects the killer. The brother arrived mysteriously a day early. Her daughter disliked her mother because she didn’t support her art and her son had a gambling problem. Even Jack, the husband is selling the horses she gave him in her will.

Later, her son discovers Echo is really his mother and the final mystery is revealed. Spoiler Alert!

A gratuitous chase ensues with Jack, her son and Echo. In a final twist, it turns out the son killed his mom via a horse tranquilizer/steroid concoction to pay off his gambling debts.

In the final scene, Margie returns to the Dollhouse and is wiped.

All in all, this episode is slightly below mediocre. Nothing new is introduced and our characters lives become more complicated. Topher’s little “date” adds more personality for “our voice” in the Dollhouse and we get Paul becoming more Angelish than ever.

This is probably one of the more forgettable episodes of the series so far. With the last 3 shows determining whether Dollhouse will see another day, you’d think we’d get more serialistic WTF and OMG episodes that push the main story arc.

With Alpha returning in the final two, we’re going to get just that. But by then, it may be too late. And I don’t want to get an apology years later explaining “Oops, we made a mistake on canceling Dollhouse.”

That would plain suck.

Here be the "Haunted" promo.



Tuesday, April 14, 2009

Dollhouse "A Spy in the House of Love" (TV Review)

I'm enjoying watching Eliza Dushku in various, stunning, scanitly clad Barbie outfits in every Dollhouse episode. I appreciate the little things...y'know?

So yeah this episode starts off with Eliza in a Dominatrix outfit looking FUCKING HAWT!

Check out the scene below.






Oh yeah, there's some awesome twists and turns in this episode. Good shit all around. Plus we get more Sierra and Ivy than you can handle. Yay.


My review as always is on UGO.com. If you want to share your 2 cents, comment here or register on UGO.com blogs.

I may be even reviewing the final 5 episodes of Prison Break. So be sure to check that out.

Comment will ya?!?!

Tuesday, April 07, 2009

Dollhouse "Needs" (TV Review)

Wow if Eliza rang my doorbell in that outfit, I'd be a complete mess. I'd close my mouth, invite her in for a Dr. Pepper and ask her if she'd like to see my arrowhead collection.

What too geeky?

Well Ballard's dream kinda sucked too.

This week's episode of Dollhouse was kinda lame. It just didn't have the kick I was looking for and didn't have the Kool Aid "Oh Yeah" sorta feeling like the last 2 did.

Check out my review over at UGO.com.

And please register over there and leave a comment. Let me know what you think. Screw it, I know you guys and girls watch Sarah Connor Chronicles as well. Poor David Silver.

What did you think about that twisty twist of lemonade?

Tuesday, March 31, 2009

Dollhouse "Echoes" (TV Review)

Look at that picture of Eliza Dushku. Yowsers. I love this show.

In this week's episode of Dollhouse, we get some juicy info on Echo as her past self Caroline plus so many quotey quotable one liners, you wish you were playing scrabble. It's wacktastic!

Check out my review over at UGO.com.

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Dollhouse "Man on the Street" (TV Review)

Well this was the episode we've all been waiting for. When Dollhouse became the cult shows of cult shows.

Joss Whedon reminded us with this episode why he is THE MASTER.

So many juicy goodness came out this awesome episode I don't even know where to start.

Check out my review on UGO.com.