My Finish Line

Back in January I got on our bathroom scale and nearly fell off it. Not because I'm a klutz, but because it read 184.9 lbs. This was the heaviest I've been since my last pregnancy (22 years ago), and it explained why none of my clothes were fitting anymore, why my knees felt awful all day, the lack of energy, etc.

I'm not obsessive about my weight, but I knew I had to do something about it. At my age it's just not a good idea to carry so many extra pounds. So I resolved to use this year to lose the weight.

Ideally I needed to lose 50 lbs., but that didn't seem like a realistic goal. I'm 55 years old, and everything about me is slowing down. My arthritis makes it difficult to exercise, and I've been on a sugar-free and low-fat diet for the last ten years. There are only so many calories I can cut. Also, I'm not a fan of diet products and plans. I needed to make changes, but my options were limited. I thought if I got creative, and worked really hard, I might be able to lose 30 lbs. in a year.

I started the work by walking more, and changed my lunch to salads only. I was tired and hungry all the time, but now and then I'd get on the scale and be a pound or two lighter. I love bread a little too much, so I cut that way back, and gave up salty chips and snacks. But the weight didn't magically melt off me, and it was depressing. After six months I'd lost twenty-six pounds, but that was where I plateaued.

Four pounds aren't a big deal. I'd done very well. I was fitting back into my clothes, my knees stopped hurting and I had lots of energy. I could have put off losing more weight until next year.

Those are the bargains you make with yourself when the finish line seems impossible to reach. You tell yourself it's okay to quit, that you did most of it, and the rest is too hard. And then one morning you climb on the scale and you've gained a pound or two. I did, in August, after I'd been flirting with giving up.

I didn't much care for that, especially after all the work and sacrifice it took for me to lose a pound or two. I went back to work. I watched my portions. I walked twice as much. I walked the dogs, and went out and walked around town and the malls and the markets. I worked outside to help my guy with some yard stuff. He took me to a big flea market on weekends so I could walk there. I stopped sitting around so much, and I also stopped weighing myself so much.

The extra pounds went away, but the four remaining to make my goal stuck with me. I figured by the time Halloween rolled around and the winter holidays loomed that I probably wasn't going to lose them, but I kept at it anyway. You see, after I lost these thirty pounds, I planned to try for twenty more next year. To do that, the changes I'd made to my exercising and diet had to become permanent.

Yesterday I got on the scale, and this is what I weighed:



So I've lost thirty and a half pounds* in eleven and a half months. I fought hard for every pound that came off. And next year, I'm going to try to lose twenty more. I think I'll be successful, too, but even if I'm not, I'm going to work at it every day and get healthier.

*Added: I put the wrong weight at the beginning of the post, which I've now corrected -- I started at 184.9 lbs. in January.

Next Year

2010 is almost here, and while it's always tempting to make some resolutions, I'd rather focus on keeping my options open. In part it's because I had to end so many things in 2009; I probably have a mild case of enditis. There are plenty of things I want to do, both personally and professionally, and I hope I have the chance to try, but I'm not inclined to make a list this time around. What I want most in the next year is not to commit to anything except PBW and writing. That should give me plenty of room to breathe and dream and create as needed.

Hey, even an obsessive-compulsive organizer/planner like me can learn to be less regimented, more spontaneous. If nothing else I'm giving myself a year to find out if I can.

If you're in the market for a desk planner you can write in that is geared specifically for your writing needs, check out Small Beer Press's A Working Writer's Daily Planner 2010, which you can buy in trade paper, remainder, or DRM-free e-book form at their web site.

I bought this to mainly to contribute to a charity drive, but I was pleasantly surprised by how nice it is. It's a desk diary type of planner, compact but just the right size to carry along whereever you wander. Along with one-page week at a glance calendar blocks, there are pages with details on the year's sub ops, contests and residencies; writing prompts, submission and result tables, blank pages for notes and even some paper dolls for when you need a break (click here to see two inside pages; I couldn't fit all of it on my scanner but it'll give you the general idea of the layout.) It's definitely aimed more toward academics and those who are working in the literary end of the biz, but it's the first planner I've ever seen published especially for use by writers, so I thought it was pretty cool.

As you've no doubt already noticed, PBW is undergoing some renovations (a project I had intended to finished during the holidays, but NY dropped a boatload of work on me, and that had to come first.) After five years of basic black and white I thought I'd add a little color. Okay, a very little, but there's a header now, too. As for what else will be changing, you'll have to wait and see, but I hope to freshen things up and provide some new/interesting content. Stay tuned for more on that after the new year.

One change to my Scribd.com* virtual library -- because overseas readers can't purchase it, I'll be taking down my only for-sale e-book, Way of the Cheetah, as of 1/1/10. I don't know if I'll be offering it again anywhere, so if you were interested in a copy and you don't live outside the U.S., get your copy before January 1st (cost is $1.00.)

Now it's your turn: what are some of your plans for 2010? Are you giving up anything old, or starting anything new, or keeping your options open? Let us know in comments.

*Note 9/3/10: Since Scribd.com instituted an access fee scam to charge people for downloading e-books, including those I have provided for free for the last ten years, I no longer recommend using their service. See my post about this scam here.

Bucket Books

A life-goal or "bucket" list is comprised of all the things a person wants to do before life is over (or they kick the bucket.) The list can contain anything from ordinary/mainstream ambitions such as "get married and have kids" to exotic or highly unlikely dreams like "buy my own island and live there." In many of the articles I've read about the practice, writing and/or publishing a book is usually on the list.

I'm not surprise to see that there are so many aspiring bucket-list book writers out there; the Times' Joseph Epstein claimed a survey indicated that 81% of all Americans feel they have a book in them. Why not write a book before the final kick? It's certainly more realistic and doable than "climb Mt. Everest" or "sleep with George Clooney."

(Btw, George, after 25 years I'm still madly in love with my guy, and men in his family tend to live 'til their nineties, so you never really made my list. Sorry.)

I think those of us who are working writers already have slightly different bucket lists. I still have some things I want to do, like see the Grand Canyon and grow my hair down to my knees, but on mine there are mostly books I intend to write before I go. My list is not static -- I actually write them (both Dream Called Time and If Angels Burn were once bucket books) and then I add something new: a massive nonfic history of American patchwork quilting, a straight Western set in California, an old-style Gothic haunted house story set in the South. I would absolutely love to write a book in a language other than English, but my fluency in the languages I do know is such that I'd have to go back to school for at least a couple of years. Still, that's why it's a bucket list.

So what is something you've put on your book or life bucket list? Let us know in comments.

Image credit: © Frenta | Dreamstime.com