Rosemary's Baby Remake Dead! The Birds Remake in Question!

Platinum Dunes head honchos Brad Fuller and Andrew Form dropped a bombshell today that's sure to please those, like myself, firmly planted in the anti-remake camp. During the press conference for the upcoming Platinum Dunes production The Unborn, Fuller & Form indicated firmly that the previously touted redo of Roman Polanski's Rosemary's Baby is no longer happening. Here's what they said over at Collider.com:

"We went down that road and we even talked to the best writers in town and it feels like it might not be do-able. We couldn’t’ come up with something where it felt like it was relevant and we could add something to it other than what it was so we’re now not going to be doing that film."

Score one for reason. Huzzah!

Furthermore, here's what the boys had to say about another frequently poo-pooed remake they've been attached to, that of Alfred Hitchcock's The Birds:

"Martin [Campbell] has been working on the script and we’re expecting a script in the next 2-3 weeks, but... its not like Drew, Michael [Bay] and I think that we’re just going to crap all over Alfred Hitchcock’s movie. I mean, Alfred Hitchcock, in a company-wide opinion, is probably the greatest director of what we do, and other things too... Michael and I studied [him] in college, and there’s a reverence for him. So that’s not a movie that we’re just going to step up and just go have birds attacking people and trying to throw that into the box office. If we can’t make that movie unique or add something to it, I don’t think we’re going to make it."

Hmmm. Could it be that the glut of remakes is finally causing some to come to their senses and respect the sanctity of classics that shouldn't be remade? Well... let's not get carried away. But at least Rosemary's Baby is officially off. Spread the word.

Special thanks to fervent reader Gord for passing along this scoop!

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Ms. Alba, Haven't You Done Enough Harm Already?

As if her lame retread of the Chinese cult favorite The Eye hasn't built enough ill will toward Jessica Alba amongst genre fans, the vacuous actress has now seen fit to desecrate some of the finest horror films ever made.

In a new cover story for Latina magazine, Alba ineptly attempts to recreate famous scenes from her five supposedly favorite horror movies. Check out this cringe-worthy Psycho shot:


If only young Jessica possessed a tenth of the poise, class and chops of a Janet Leigh, this might not be nearly as sad. Want more? Here's her take on Rosemary's Baby:


Check her out displaying the acting skills she honed on the Disney Channel. And speaking of sacrilege, here's Jessie's impersonation of Tippi Hedren in The Birds:


Alba has some better luck with Scream, in which she steps into the shoes of an actress nearly as inane and irritating as herself:


Notice how they made sure that Ghostface can actually be seen creeping up on her, just so readers would be able to tell what movie it's supposed to be? Nice touch. If you have the constitution for one more, here's a rather artful--if only loosely adapted--tribute to The Exorcist:


Now if only that ceiling wasn't there, then maybe she might have simply floated away into the stratosphere, so that we would no longer have to be subjected to drek like Good Luck Chuck and FF: Rise of the Silver Surfer.

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Original Hitchcock Star Says Remake Is for the Birds

In a rare turn of events, one of the stars of a horror classic is taking a vocal stand against the rash of remakes that many fans feel is plaguing the industry these days. It's Tippi Hedren, leading lady in the 1963 Alfred Hitchcock favorite The Birds (still gorgeous at 77, by the way.) She had some choice words about the proposed redux that's been tossed around lately in a recent MTV interview. Check it out here.

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