When Sinuses Attack

I've woken up with drainage and a throat that felt like someone's been working it with a bottle brush for the last couple of days. I tend to get bronchitis very easily and my wife loves to point out when I should have gone to the doctor sooner, so today the sore throat and what not was bad enough I actually went to see the local saw bones.She looked in my gullet and took a step back saying, "Ima swab you."

Strep tests suck. I managed to not yack on the pretty lady with the sadistic q-tip and luckily it wasn't strep or anything else bad yet. So I take my Z-Pack and Mucinex and wander through my hazy life for the next few days.

In the meantime I went back and looked over Working on Terra. Lawdog has been nudging me to publish it but there are just too many parts of it that are dependent on previous material. So my illness addled brain decided I could sort that out. Three hours and six hundred more words later I now have a 5,000 word short story all so I could use the word "dearth" in a sentence.

I had planned to give it to my primary grammar editor tonight since she's done with grad school for the semester.  I can even remember thinking, "Don't forget the thumb drive." as I was packing my shit to come home. 

Guess what? It's still in my other pc. Being sick is awesome, but it's even better with a little ADHD thrown in for fun. I'm gonna go lay down now.

-Tole

A Drowning Pickup

This just in from the Isn't That Interesting Department...

But first some backstory.

The area I live in suffered an ungodly drought from 2010 through 2015. We were literally about to start deciding who could have water today when the rains came. Everything flooded. We went from having lakes that were about gone to lakes that were running over their spillways in literally a couple of weeks. It was amazing.

During that time I developed a habit of looking over the side of a bridge I cross every day on my way to work to see just how close it was to the bottom of that bridge and to see how far up into the flood plains it had gone.  It's been over three years since and I still look every time. I probably will for the rest of my life.

All that being said I was not prepared for this...

Now that old boy is a good ways out into the water.  A helluva lot farther than he could have driven. Especially when you consider that this was the second day after I saw it. The first day the water was over the hood, but I was too awestruck to stop and take a photo.

That part of the river is surrounded by pastureland not roads, so they couldn't have been going THAT fast. Could they? I mean if you were driving through the countryside and were surprised by the sudden appearance of a river brakes would come into play.  It did prompt a conversation among some friends about exactly how he got that far into the water.

Here is the winning suggestion:

Has to be the case. I can almost hear the "YEEEEEHAAAAW!"

-Tole

Old & Broken - The Late Night Edition

This time though it's kinda funny.

Last night as I was drifting off to sleep, my right thigh decided it would catch a cramp from just shy of the 9th Circle of Hell. This has been happening quite often since I started a new blood pressure med that boasts dehydration as one of it's most common side effects.  Funny thing is that dehydration will also elevate blood pressure as well as cause these hellacious muscle cramps.

Anyway, leg cramp. So I do what any red blooded American man would do in that situation. I scream like a 5 year old and bolt upright out of bed to try and stretch the demon muscle back into a more relaxed mode. Here's where it gets interesting.

You see I am actually on two different meds for blood pressure and oddly enough both bottles come with a warning about causing dizziness if you stand too quickly. Well, I didn't just get dizzy. I went straight to tunnel vision and damned near passed out.

Here's the conundrum. Give in to the dizziness and sit down effectively giving the muscle cramp permission to kill you, OR continue stretching and risk ending up unconscious in the floor.

My dad always said that getting old ain't for sissies. I never knew how right he was.

-Tole

Quick edit.  As I was discussing last night's adventure with a co-worker I remembered that I gave blood last night on the way home from work. Maybe the near-faint was aggravated by the fact that I was a pint low.

Happy Thanksgiving

Thought I'd take a minute to wish a Happy Thanksgiving to my readers...all seven of you. In all seriousness though I truly hope anyone who happens across my mad ramblings has a great day. I for one have a lot to be thankful for and plan to eat a piece of pie for each and every thing I think of. If I die, I die happy and full of pie with friends and loved ones by my side.

-Tole

Blog Changes

I spent a little time this morning changing my blog's theme and layout.  It had been like it was for over ten years, so I kind of felt like it needed changing.  Let me know what you think, and for your enjoyment here's Vehicle by The Ides of March. It's been stuck in my head all day and I hate to suffer alone.

Don't Taze Me Bro'! - Follow up

In an effort to stave off surgery the orthopedic surgeon I saw this week for the carpal tunnel issue stabbed me in the wrist with a VERY long needle. The steroid injection into the carpal tunnel kinda stings at first, that is until the blessed anesthetic kicks in. Fingers were numb for a little over an hour. Made typing interesting.

One thing I found fascinating is how even though the doc was stabbing my wrist I felt the pain in my finger tips and palm. Doc moved the needle a little and that went away but referential pain has always been fascinating.

Another fun bit from the shot was that my thumb, index finger, middle finger, and the inside part of my ring finger were numb for just over an hour. When the doc handed me my paperwork I took it in my left hand and dropped it straightaway.

She told me, “That is what severe symptoms are like.”

My only thought was, “how could someone function like that? I couldn’t.”

The way the decision for the injection was explained to me is that they like to do the injection first because it has a two-fold purpose being both therapeutic as well as diagnostic.

IF the diagnosis of carpal tunnel syndrome is correct the shot will give symptom relief. If the symptoms return sometime in the not too distant future, the shot may be repeated. If the symptoms return again, then that indicates a surgical procedure is likely to be the only permanent option.

IF the diagnosis of carpal tunnel syndrome is wrong the shot will have no effect on the symptoms and further investigation is warranted. (The doc is confident in the diagnosis though and we HOPE that this is not the case.)

So for now I sit and wait for the next couple of weeks to gauge how effective this is going to be. I'm hoping I fall into the small percentage where the shot takes care of it. Knowing my luck though...

Here's hoping I break from my norm.

-Tole

On Elections and Such

Yesterday people went out and voted. Some are happy with the results and some are not. However, I can truly say I'm happy. Not because one party/person won or another lost. Not because one party or the other controls this or that. I am happy because people got up off of their assess and cast a vote. I'm happy because our system, whether you think it flawed or not, functioned just as it has for over two hundred years. I feel beyond blessed to live in a country where the population at large has a voice in their own destiny.

So take a second before you start foaming at the mouth over this issue or that. Take a breath before you start your vitriolic tirade over the evils of the other guy. Seriously stop and be glad that we live in the biggest social experiment in the history of mankind and that it is still working relatively well despite all of our best efforts to break it completely.

And if any of you disagree with me...you will be shot. (Yes, I know it's not funny and that's the damned point.)

Tole

My Friends...How I Loathe Them

Kidding...mostly. I am truly blessed to have some twisted friends…bless their evil little hearts. For instance, I NEVER intended for Tole to have a love interest, but OldNFO suggested it one time. I guess he sent an email to my muse, and she responded with “Oh that’s gotta be a thing.” Enter Serilla.  Well, I had a thought cross my mind this morning about this developing relationship, so I sent a text to Lawdog. Below is what happened next:

ME:     I can’t decide who’s the deviant in this relationship between Tole and Serilla. They’re both pursuing an inter-species relationship. Both of their races would consider them pervs. Interesting concept to explore. Maybe Serilla will become a pariah to her kind for loving a human.

LD:     Or maybe it’s not the first time a dragon has loved a human.

ME:    Hmm. Interesting story line.

LD:     Older dragons caution the younger dragons: “They age so quickly, you’ll just get your heart broken.”

“You can’t hoard a human, sooner or later you’ll lose them.”

LD:     Terrible thought for a creature that hoards everything.

LD:     Romantic legends tell of a dragon who found a human lover who lived a dragon’s span. But it’s only a legend.

LD:     You’re welcome.

LD:     Young dragons wistfully dreaming of a human that would live as long as they do, older dragons shaking their heads ruefully.

ME:     (middle finger emoji)

LD:      I can hear the teeth grinding from here.

Young dragons think of other dragons as stodgy, grey flannel types. Humans are the long-haired BAD Boy Poet dreamers with the tragic, romantic fate.

ME:    (middle finger emoji) (middle finger emoji) (ROFL emoji) (ROFL emoji)

LD:     Teach you to ask a question.

LD:     I now have this mental image of teen dragons in human form throwing their panties at Elvis.

LD:     "What Axl Rose didn’t know was that most of the rabid fans in the audience were actually young adult dragons."

LD:     An older dragon awkwardly patting his fledgling on the shoulder as she cries on her pile of gold. “What about Grillsnax? He’s got a lovely hoard…”

“No, mama, I’ll never love anyone again!”

“Go out, have a nice sheep or maybe a cow…”

“No! Grillsnax is BORING!”

Older dragon sighs, “I know, sweetling. Things will look better after a while. I promise.”

LD:      And…You’re welcome.

ME:     Young Dragons in Love needs to be written…go!

Oh and I've just about got the next part of The Affairs of Dragons ready, so stay tuned.

-Tole

Mikey!!!

My daughter is totally in love with Mikey from The Affairs of Dragons.  I have to admit, I like the character a lot too.

Anywho, I recently celebrated the completion of another trip around the sun and one of the gifts I received was this sculpture of Mikey that my daughter made for me. The awesomeness is overwhelming.

So cool.

Tole

And the Hits Just Keep On...

Ok, I guess I should be grateful that my a/c made it through the heat of summer, but dammit we still have upper 80's and lower 90's happening here! Hopefully this is something simple and my trusty a/c repair guy will patch it up one more time.  I mean these things should last more that ten years right?!?!?

Grrr....

-Tole

Update: two blown capacitors replaced and we are cool again! Had them go ahead and check the Freon while he was there.  This is Texas and we are known to have unexpected heat through October.  Serviced the heater also cause it's just that time.

Please Feel Free to Call Me a Hack

Like I said in an earlier post, these stories are just random thoughts that are running in my head.  Comments are always welcome as is criticism be it good or bad. All I ask is please don't leave me in a bloody mess on the floor.  When I write I tend to get drawn into thoughts and find myself running down rabbit holes all of the time.  One of the unintended consequences of indulging my ADHD is that I will sometimes contradict something I have said in a previous entry.  Call me on it.  I want to have consistency in these, so please feel free to point out when I blow something up.

I do want to thank Lawdog, OldNFO, my wife, and my daughter for taking up this banner already. Without their encouragement Tole would still just be an interesting idea that I talk way too much about.

So if you like them, please say so and feel free to share with your friends.  If you don't care for them, tell me that too.  It'll keep me grounded and may even push me to try and be a better writer.

Thanks.
Tole

Quick Blurb on Being Old and Broken

So after the doctor spent about twenty minutes or so shocking the ever loving snot out of me nodding and "um hmm"-ing to himself the entire time, we have confirmed what I already knew.  My wrists are well and thoroughly FUBAR.

It was an interesting experience though.  He'd shock me and look at the screen of the machine.  Next he'd take out his phone and use it as a calculator to do some math that the machine wasn't doing for him. Lastly he'd take a pencil (yes an actual yellow #2) and jot some numbers onto a form.  It was all kind of a surreal mix of old and new technology.

When it was all done he said, "well these numbers are text book for carpal tunnel syndrome. Is one hand worse that the other?"

I told him that the left seems to be dead to the world more often and more deeply than the right.

"I see that too," was all he said.  Then he discussed my options which include physical therapy (not his recommendation since the wrist braces haven't helped at all), steroid injections, or surgery.  The latter of the two required referral to an orthopedic surgeon.

YAY!

So that's pretty much where we are.  Numb and waiting for the phone to ring. Writing is slow but it is happening.

Tole

Don't Taze Me Bro'!

In the ongoing saga of my sleeping hands...neuro-conductivity testing.

If you've ever had it done that's all I need to say.

If you haven't, basically I'm going to pay a doctor to use a taser on me...on purpose.

***sigh***

Getting old is not for wimps.

Tole

In the Interim

I received a scolding from a friend that I need to put up a blog post. In all honesty he’s right, but I have sworn to not discuss politics or any kind of divisive topic.  There’s enough of that going around without me kicking in my opinion, so don’t expect any of that sort of drek out of me.  Not gonna happen. I just don’t feel the need to prove I’m right. (Please read that with the appropriate amount of snark.)

I’m also not going to talk too much about my personal life. Not because I’m worried someone will discover my secret identity and expose me to the world. Ask anyone I know and they’ll let you know I am not one to shy away from attention.  I thrive on it.  In all honesty I’m not talking about me because I would bore the hell out of you in about 6.7 seconds. Unless, that is, you guys would like to hear about budgeting and preparing for a year-end audit for the financial statements of the company I work for.  No? Don't blame you.

Well, there is one thing I could talk about that has developed in the last couple of years. Wait, that’s not true.  It’s an addiction I’ve had all of my life but just now got to a point where I can sort of afford to indulge it. Since high school way back in 19…something or other I have had an unreasonable love for the Ford Mustang.  I have set a goal to have one of every generation at some point…even the Mustang II from the 70’s. See?  I told you in was unreasonable.

Maybe, I'll mix some things about that stuff in as I go along if anyone cares to see it. Might even put up some pictures of the custom stuff I'm doing to them.

For now though, there's a story that needs my attention.

Tole

Brief Update

A little out of character blurb real quick.  I'm back from my vacation and I am writing.  However, it is taking FOREVER thanks in no small part to carpal tunnel crap acting up.  Without the braces I can type for about five to ten minutes before my hands are numb.  YAY! With the braces I can type a lot longer but it is ungodly slow going.  Ain't life grand?

Something Completely Different

When I started this blog way back in 2006 it was intended to be a place for me to vent and talk about things that I found interesting. For some reason that purpose kind of withered on the vine. I haven't stopped writing, words have to come out of my brain lest it explode all over my living room. I just found that I was able to accomplish my original purpose in other ways. Consequently the blog fell to the wayside.

That bugs me.

So a couple of months ago I set myself the task of trying to find a new purpose for this thing. This is where I am now. Instead of letting it sit around collecting the digital equivalent of dust I thought maybe I'd use it to share some short stories I've been writing around a character named, oddly enough, Tole.

If anyone happens to run across this, I hope you enjoy them.

-Tole