If You Liked Dick Cheney, You’ll Love Newt Gingrich

It might be fun — in that sick sort of way — to have a pool on how many foreign quagmires we can dig ourselves into under President Gingrich.  Dick Cheney and his adorable little sockpuppet were just getting warmed up with Afghanistan and Iraq.

That was a nice start.  But what about Iran?  Venezuela?  North Korea?  Syria?  So many countries to liberate, so little time.  Newt Gingrich’s foreign policy team is straight out of Dick Cheney’s inner circle.  They include:

David Wurmser was one of the ringleaders of our Iraqi invasion.  And now he’s Gingrich’s Middle East policy advisor.

James Woolsey is a former CIA director who’s fixated on invading Iran.  He compares our failure to attack Iran with England’s appeasement of Nazi Germany in the 1930s.  (See Godwin’s Law.)  Woolsey’s other fixation is President Obama’s “political jihad promoting Islam around the world.”

Stephen Yates was part of Cheney’s national security team.  He thinks China is the solution to America’s “enemy deprivation syndrome.”  i.e. “You need some unifying enemy after the collapse of the Soviet Union.”  Great.  Let’s combine the best features of the Cold War and our current Crusade in the Middle East.

Let’s hope this week’s Not-Mitt-Romney will crash and burn soon.

The American People Do Not Want a Sleazy Two-Timing Speaker of the House

Not just one, but two affairs for Mr. Family Values. John Boehner received a 91% rating from the now-defunct Christian Coalition for his votes on “moral“ issues. He preaches the Gospel; he just doesn’t practice it.

Whatever respect you have or don't have for the National Enquirer and similar tabloids, their celebrity gossip tends to be pretty accurate. With so many prying “reporters” and in-your-face photographers, how could they not be?

Newt Gingrich, Bob Livingston, John Boehner — there seems to be a pattern here. Preach fire and brimstone, then get caught being one of those wicked sinners you were pretending not to hate.

Newt Gingrich resigned his position. Bob Livingston, his would-be replacement, stepped aside after Larry Flynt revealed that Livingston had had numerous affairs. What would Jesus do? What will Weepy the Orange do?

How are the teabaggers and Biblehumpers going to rationalize this?

Frank Luntz: “Protect Wall Street From Those Socialist Bureaucrats!!”

Get ready for the next round of “grass roots” corporate front groups and choreographed “demonstrations” against financial reform.

Frank Luntz is BACK. (Did he ever leave?)

If you remember Newt Gingrich’s Contract On America in the mid-1990s, and last year’s multi-billion dollar Astroturf campaign against health care reform, then you’re familiar with Frank Luntz, whether his name rings a bell or not. Pay no attention to the man behind the curtain.

In the past year we’ve all seen these phony “demonstrations” carried out by HMO lobbyists — and millions of gullible cerebrally-challenged dunces who hang on their every word — marching and waving signs saying “hands off MY health care” and “Your Health, Your Problem,” etc.

They were saying what Frank Luntz told them to say.

And now Frank Luntz is telling his faithful gullible drones how to keep enabling and empowering Wall Street — to their OWN detriment — while convincing these drooling dumbfucks that all of America’s financial problems were created by Obama’s Communist bureaucrats meddling in our Free Enterprise system.

Warning: .pdf file (I hate those fuckin’ things): Here is a link to Frank Luntz’ memo telling all of his sycophants what to say, when to say it, how to think and which orifice to wipe.

Read it and weep. Here’s how you get them slaves to start worshiping their Masters and blame all of their problems on them Yankee “outsiders” who will ruin everything they’ve ever known.

This document isn’t too slow-loading as far as .pdf documents go. Please scroll through it, and get a preview of the Far Right/Oligarch/Wall Street talking points you’ll be seeing and hearing over and over in the next few months. Bet you can’t wait.