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Kindle Edition
First published March 5, 2019
It’s not the pain that’s unendurable. It’s the hopelessness. It’s the hopelessness that makes you reckless.
Her words are a threat to their livelihood.
I wish, so much, all the time, that I didn’t give a shit about this sort of thing—that I could be like Warner, a frozen, unforgiving island; or even like Adam, who’s found his happiness in family, in his relationship with his brother—but I’m like neither. Instead, I’m a big, raw, bleeding heart, and I spend my days pretending not to notice that I want more. That I need more.
It doesn’t seem right that so much horrible shit should be, like, allowed to go down in such a short period of time. There should be a fail-safe in the universe somewhere, something that automatically shuts down in the event of extreme human stupidity. Maybe an emergency lever. A button, even.
This is ridiculous.
Shit. This kid is breaking my heart.
“For me, it’s a symbol of resistance.”
“It’s not the pain that’s unendurable. It’s the hopelessness. It’s the hopelessness that makes you reckless.”
: ̗̀➛"𝑰𝒕'𝒔 𝒏𝒐𝒕 𝒑𝒂𝒊𝒏 𝒕𝒉𝒂𝒕'𝒔 𝒖𝒏𝒃𝒆𝒂𝒓𝒂𝒃𝒍𝒆. 𝑰𝒕'𝒔 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒉𝒐𝒑𝒆𝒍𝒆𝒔𝒔𝒏𝒆𝒔𝒔. 𝑰𝒕'𝒔 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒉𝒐𝒑𝒆𝒍𝒆𝒔𝒔𝒏𝒆𝒔𝒔 𝒕𝒉𝒂𝒕 𝒎𝒂𝒌𝒆𝒔 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒓𝒆𝒄𝒌𝒍𝒆𝒔𝒔."
*ੈ 𝒫𝓇𝑒-𝓇𝑒𝓋𝒾𝑒𝓌
“Are you out of your mind?”
And when he says, without a hint of irony—
“No more than usual”
—it’s crystal clear to me that this dude is not okay.
Warner peers past me, into my room, and for a moment, says nothing. Then, quietly: “Kishimoto, if I considered other people’s mediocre standards a sufficient metric by which to measure my own accomplishments, I’d never have amounted to anything.” He looks up, meets my eyes. “You should demand more of yourself. You’re entirely capable.”
“Are you—?” I blink, stunned. “I’m sorry, was that your idea of a compliment?”
He stares at me, his face impassive. “Get dressed.”
I raise my eyebrows. “You taking me out to breakfast?”
I hated that I cried. Hated that I couldn’t help it. Everyone thinks I’m not supposed to give a shit—that I shouldn’t—but I do. I always do.
And I give a shit about this asshole, too.
“Have you seen her yet?” I ask.
And then, so quietly I almost miss it—
“No.”
Shit. This kid is breaking my heart.
She spins around, turns to face him. “What other languages do you speak?” she says, her eyes flashing, and Warner goes so suddenly still my heart hurts for him.
This moment is too real.
Warner and Juliette are both so full of shit today. They’re pretending to be so hard, so cool and collected, and then—this. Juliette says one thing to him and Warner turns into an idiot.