Porky's

I saw it in middle school, thought it super-cool, and most of my

college friends had fond memories to share of sneaking in to see

it. The subject would come up over a game of quarters or

something.

Porky's isn't brilliant and maybe deserves a lot of socio-critical

dissection, but I just thought it was funny at the time. I don't know it

deserves film-critic attack - wasn't it low-budget and lucky to get

some mainstream distribution?

Anyway, my memories of Porky's made American Pie a lot more

funnier, too. The two would be a good movie night double feature.

Porky's is the original teen sex comedy.

I had the great pleasure of seeing Porky's in a late night showing on opening day in March 1982 in a theater packed to the gills with 18-25 year olds (although I was 30). I hurt for 3 days from laughing so hard.

There is a portion of the movie, beginning close to the 1 hour mark that is the absolute funniest 14 minutes ever put on film. This includes these three hilarious scenes: Coach and Lassie in the boys locker room (Coach Brackett finds out why they call Miss Honeywell Lassie), then it segues to the guys peeping through the holes into the girls shower room, where Beulah Balbricker gets a 'handle' on Tommy's situation, immediately followed by the scene with Coach Brackett, Coach Warren and Head Coach Goodenough in Principal Carter's office with Beulah describing the "incriminating mole". There were people out of their seats, laying on the floor of the theater screaming with laughter. I have yet to see another motion picture invoke this kind of hilarity in a movie theater. I saw it in the theater 2 or 3 times in it's original theatrical run with the same response. When it became available, I bought the VHS copy, then the laser disc copy and when I got the DVD a few month's ago, I watched it for the zillionth time and I still laugh my butt off when I see those scenes. The acting is great for a bunch of no-names, there are actually great multiple plot-lines (in addition to the typical "get laid at any cost" plot) and the cinematography, editing and sound is above average. They made this movie in 90 days for less than $4 million and it grossed $7 million opening weekend and has grossed over $100 million in theaters to date, most of that in 1982 dollars. The only thing I can say bad about Porky's is that they should have stopped after the first one. The first pathetic sequel (The Next Day) lacked humor, the second sequel (Porky's Revenge) had 30-year-olds playing teenagers and they had long-since lost their youthful charm.

I think it was Crash that surpassed it decades later. Can't recall for sure to be honest. Look it up if you care. Anyway, it's a funny teen sex comedy if you're into that sort of forbidden fruit. I really only have two words for this review...

Mike Hunt

Okay, maybe a few more...

Has anyone seen Mike Hunt?

I've never met anyone in my life who didn't love "Porky's" (in real life, that is, because on the Internet you always encounter people with different opinions) and that is probably just because this is an irresistibly energetic and out-and-out funny 80's teen comedy! The essence of juvenile & vulgar comedies lies here within this film, and arguably also "Fast Times at Ridgemont High" and "Animal House", but definitely not in the lame and uninspired nowadays flicks such as "American Pie". All the classic gags and politically incorrect jests are here: small penis jokes, big penis jokes, sticking penises in usual things, voyeurism through minuscule peepholes, the eternal virgin nerd, loud-screaming girls, redneck humor and much more. If you ever wondered where Bart Simpson found the inspiration for his prank calls, well that's probably because he watched "Porky's" as well! This is the simplistic tale of a bunch of teenage friends, all of them with incontrollable raging hormones, attending high school in the 1950's. In their never ending journey to get laid, they battle against all types of annoying authorities (read: adults) like gym coaches, parents, police officers and obnoxious nightclub owners. Particularly this last group forms a severe obstacle, as the boys are desperately trying to get into a strip club in a neighboring county but the owner – a fat and sleazy hillbilly nicknamed Porky – and his gang of local yokels get a kick out of humiliating and beating up juvenile visitors. In between all their hectic adventures at school, the group plots the ultimate act of vengeance against Porky and his whole county of hillbilly freaks. Personally I don't understand how you could NOT enjoy a movie like "Porky's", as it is so stimulating, cheerful and harmlessly infantile. The main characters are delightfully stereotypical high school bastards (especially the unforgettable Pee Wee) and some of the situations they find themselves stuck in are indescribably hilarious. A few of the highlights include an outrageous sex sequence with future "Sex and the City" starlet Kim Cattrall and the legendary coach Balbricker's quest to have one of the boys suspended for obscenities in the girls' shower. Needless to say "Porky's" is a sex comedy chock-full of gratuitous T & A (and enough wool to knit a sweater with…) and crude insinuations, but if this movie is too offensive for you already, you better sing up in a convent straight away. This was the biggest box office hit for the versatile writer/director Bob Clark, who directed pleasant comedies like this as well as creepy horror movies like "Black Christmas" and "Dead of Night". He sadly died in a dramatic car accident in 2007. Thanks to films like "Porky's", he at least leaves behind a spirited heritage! Rest in peace, Mr. Clark.

I am proud to say this is one of my favorite comedies, and I normally don't even like the "American Pie" type of sex comedy. The humor is raunchy, but in a good-natured way, and all the actors look like they're having a blast. The odd thing is that there doesn't seem to be any real reason why it's taking place in the 50's, except maybe to get across the message that teenagers have always been, and always will be, horny. Also, to the people who say this is "dated"... you guys do realize it's taking place 30 years before it was made, right?

It's not the funniest movie you'll ever see, except for a few truly hysterical scenes, but you have to love the way it captures the fun irresponsibility of high school. I think a lot of people can relate to this no matter what generation they're from, making it a definite classic. My advice is to steer clear of the upcoming remake, which will undoubtedly be raunchier and ruder, but probably have ten times less heart.