Woodchipper Massacre

Oh my god!! I'm a firm believer that bad movies can be good fun, but this is awful. The Woodchipper Massacre brings the horror film to a new low. There is not a doubt in my mind that this is one of the worst pieces of crap ever filmed. The acting, the music, the sweaters...I can't even describe it. It's obvious that it's just a couple of kids messing around with a home video recorder and thought they'd make a movie. I don't think you can really call it a movie though. The Woodchipper Massacre is a disgrace to B-movies everywhere. It's easily worse than Bloody Murder, and that's saying a lot. How this got distributed I'll never know. This is a major candidate for the title "worst movie ever made." It definitely gets my seal of approval.

I've never actually seen this film but can tell you one thing about its production. While a comedy/oldies radio DJ in 1988, I got a call from the production company. They asked if I'd write and record a bit they'd drop into the soundtrack as sounds eminating from a TV (the television screen itself would never be shown). I said sure, wrote a parody of '50s sci-fi monster clichés, rounded up some sound effects and called in another DJ, Pam Landry, to play the female part. As she happened to be on the air at the time, she put on a long song, joined me at the mike in the production room and we cut the voicetrack in a single take. Giggling, she then went back to her show while I mixed in the goofy sound effects. We'd have never done it if we'd known that "Woodchipper Massacre" was going to be such a turkey -- but, then again, we never got paid for our efforts, either! -- Gary Theroux

Jon McBride may not have money, but damn can he make an entertaining film! WOODCHIPPER MASSACRE is a lot of fun! This film is full of hilarious dialogue and characters. It's one of the most macabre and original premises for a film I can think of. This isn't exactly a horror film. It isn't exactly anything, though I suppose some may describe it as a black comedy.

It's pretty much about these kids whose relative comes over to take care of them. She turns out to be rather cruel to them and they end up accidentally murdering her, and they have to dispose of her body in the woodchipper. Afterward, a related family member of her shows up and the craziness really picks up! Keep in mind that this is not a good film by any means. It's poorly acted, poorly lit, and very poorly shot. However, it is also self-conscience of all this and, rather then drift into camp territory, it goes all the way. This may be bad, but at least it's good natured and at least it's funny. It's also never boring. If you want to watch a really entertaining film, I recommend you check this out!

I love retro 80's shockers that were shot on video. This falls into this category. Extremely cheap with horrible direction and even worse acting, with an outrageous plot, this is a very entertaining bad movie fun fest. The main problem for me with this movie was every actor has a very annoying voice...especially that girl, she is always whining. If you can get passed their annoying voices, you'll laugh your butt off. Although, don't expect much gore...it is not a horror movie, really ,but more of a comedy. The movie is about some kids who are alone for the weekend, well, not alone, they have their babysitting annoying aunt watching them. When their aunt dies in a complete "accident" they must dispose of the body in any wayy possible, in the most original disposing of a body ever, that even CSI won't touch! Also, one of the best taglines ever...Watch this if you want to see a realllly bad movie.

Another amateurish late '80s SOV horror film filmed in rural Connecticut. It's essentially a sitcom with a horror-themed plot. Three kids are left at home when their father goes on a business trip out of state and leaves them in the care of their vile, abusive aunt (played by writer-director Jon McBride's mother), when she is accidentally killed, the kids dispose of her body via a woodchipper and then have to deal with the aunt's deadbeat son who comes for a visit. Okay for its weird theme, but nothing really special.