Wie ich zum ersten Mal Selbstmord beging

The letter on which this movie is based was referred to by its author Neal Cassady, and its recipient Jack Kerouac as "the Joan Anderson letter" (even though the only extant fragment more prominently and dramatically dealt with a different girlfriend of Neal's at the time, nicknamed Cherry Mary). This letter, written in December 1950 about events in Cassady's life from the summer through Christmas of 1945, was "lost" circa 1954 and 1955. But before that happened, a 5,000-word fragment (on which this movie is based) had been copied (retyped) likely by Kerouac himself, and was subsequently published in 1964 in a small San Francisco literary magazine called "Notes From Underground", then again later in Cassady's posthumous autobiography "The First Third" (beginning "To have seen a specter isn't everything ..."). The entire 16,000-word letter by Cassady - which Kerouac had praised as a turning point in his approach to writing - was never seen again after 1955 - and consequently became something of a Holy Grail in the Beat world. Miraculously, in 2012, the entire letter was found after nearly sixty years in old boxes that had been stored since being rescued from the Sausalito publisher Golden Goose's garbage when it folded in 1955. It's set for auction on December 17, 2014.

Dianne Reeves wasn't born until 1956 but her "Jingle Bells" is used in the soundtrack.

The film is introduced with these sentences:

A man's life is merely a collection of events, building one upon the other. When all the events are tallied: the triumphs; the failures; the mistakes, their sum makes up the man.

These are but a few events in the life of "Superman".

Featured in Siskel & Ebert & the Movies: Face/Off/Dream with the Fishes/Head Above Water/The Last Time I Committed Suicide/When the Cat's Away (1997)