Love After School

Revived on Volume 33 of Something Weird's Dragon Art Theatre series, LOVE AFTER SCHOOL aims low, but the enthusiasm of its cast provides some stimulating hardcore porn moments.

Eve Orlon, looking brainy by way of her professorial glasses (but not her typically creepy wig), is a sex education teacher. The innocence prevailing during this bygone era of porn is established by her constantly referring to her students as "children" -boy that wouldn't pass muster today, even though the cast looks closer to 30 than high school age.

Simplicity helps for a porn charade, and basically the whole film is her showing the class how sex is done, and them trying it out for themselves. A similar format movie was issued by SWV as SCHOOL FOR HOOKERS on Vol. 3 of the series, but that one fell flat.

The kids get restless after a very randy sex demo guy (he's at attention almost immediately) gets a blow job at the beginning of their instruction, and soon they're joining in amongst themselves. The film is haphazardly constructed with scenes almost in random order, but the sex goods are delivered and Orlon gets to have both a lesbian threesome with the coeds and some action of her own.

Detracting mightily from the film's effectiveness is heavy narration that amounts to color commentary. The jerk keeps making stupid remarks and making fun of the action we're seeing. I know that an addle-minded generation or so later kids became addicted to the MST3K's similar (but funny) approach, but I prefer to take my movies straight. Why people want to have a second-hand experience instead of thinking (and reacting) for themselves is beyond me. It's practically 30 years since Siskel & Ebert debuted on TV, and I never could get into that either - people would rather watch a couple of clowns predigest movies than watch the actual movies.