The Pickup Game

Saw this recently at Hotdocs in Toronto and I have to say I was left sooo frustrated. Why did two middle class straight white male directors decide to be the feminist voice on this problematic issue? Don't get me wrong, I admired the activism attempts in the film to fight misogyny and toxic masculinity but why not give female directors and producers a real voice? There was also no mention of issues surrounding the gay and trans dating scene and the problems within. Sigh.

This film intrigued me for several reasons: I had read Neil Strauss's book The Game when it was released (probably like everybody else of my generation) and knew a few friends who had dabbled in this scene. So I was curious to check it out.

Without revealing any spoilers, I will just say that no one could have scripted an investigative film that would have had as much impact as this documentary does. It's intense and very disturbing.

But for all the darkness in the movie, it actually feels quite balanced and fair. A lot of the material comes across in a unique and un-obvious way. Certainly not how you would expect it to from the title.

This thing is tight though -- and fascinating, and frightening. One to watch and one I have recommended to everyone I've discussed it with.

While it's true that RSD and the other pickup mentors are looking for your money.. they ARE a business. You've got to expect marketing in all walks of life.. from McDonalds to Hugo Boss to the friendly plumber down the street, they're all deploying marketing strategies to get your money.

That doesn't mean that what they're selling is snake oil, what they're selling genuinely works. Mostly it's like they open a window for you to snap out of your head and enter the real world and change your perspective.

Most of us have walked through life with social anxiety and have been petrified to leave the house (I was such a case). RSD totally turned this around for me, I even started going to the club ON MY OWN, SOBER... the guy who couldn't leave the house! So I'll never accept that what they're selling is fraudulent, it's a tool and people can use that tool or they can not see the tool they've been given.

That said, no the industry isn't squeaky clean. Yes, angry little men will abuse the trust of women with what they learn. But I fail to see how something can be used for so much good should be rejected by society.

Engrossing documentary about the hidden world of dating coaches who claim to be able to turn any man into a modern day Don Juan.

Unbelievable at times, shocking at others, this documentary spoke to more than just the overlying story of the Pick-up coaches and those that pay money to listen to them. It speaks to the thousands of young men trying to follow a path in today's fickle dating world of tinder, ghosting and hook ups.

Felt like a real life version of Fight Club, although at several points you forget it's a documentary. You forget you're not watching a fictional film, which just supports the claim that truth can be more compelling than fiction.

Highly, highly recommended.

I watched this to see if I could pick up on some tips ... how wrong was I, this documentary that picks up on the dark side of the industry - rinsing insecure men of their money - not teaching them confidence and style but coercion and manipulation.