Slashlorette Party

I enjoy the "80s horror love letter" style. I have liked some of the actors in other films. I could not get into this one. Most of the characters are completely unlikeable from the start, and some even get worse from there. After the first kill took out the two normal seeming characters and the prettiest girl who am I supposed to be rooting for to survive here when they all seem so bad? And what even was that last scene? The viewer is left to fill in a lot of gaps that could have been filled by a good script and solid storytelling.

Congratulations to the film-makers for taking the name of a horror genre and turning it into a pun. Sadly, that's about the high-point of the creativity.

Now, baring in mind that the term 'slasher' is basically in the title, you're probably expecting a lot of killing. There is some, but - wow - do they make you wait for it. There's a large cast, but no one actually dies until quite a way into the movie. Secondly, you may be thinking that a film marketing itself on gory murder you may also think they the producers would have taken their time coming up with some totally outlandish and intricate kills. They don't. Sorry if this is a 'spoiler,' but people get stabbed - mainly in the head, but occasionally in the stomach.

As I mentioned the cast is quite large for a slasher film. Most of them are in no way developed and only get one or two real moments centre stage (and probably one of those is them receiving an axe to the forehead), but there are a couple who stand out - like the best friend who is probably the most likable of all of them.

I stuck with the film until the end, but largely because I wanted to know the hows and whys of why all of this had been happening. There is an explanation, but I have to say I was left a bit confused. Then I felt silly because the movie is hardly clever, so maybe I lost a couple of IQ points while I watched it.

Bride to be Brie and her sexy friends go to a log cabin in the woods (as you would for a slasher movie) for her bachelorette (or as we say in England, hen) party. Unfortunately they are joined by her vile and pathetic fiance Dolph and his dumb buddies, the party is cut short by a very obvious local nut slashing and dicing the revellers. We have to endure a long 36 minutes of bad acting before the first kill though the girls are easy on the eye. The kills are plentiful and gory but the effects are very cheap looking (as is everything else here). Several hours after the first three deaths nobody notices the victims' absence at an evening party! On the sex front we do get some girl on girl action in the shower with some surgically enhanced full frontal nudity. Dolph is an incredibly obnoxious man, if that was actor Andrew Brown's intention then he did a good job. I forgot how the film ended so I had to watch the end again the next day, I shouldn't have bothered, it's pathetic. I love slasher movies, even bad ones, but this was simply awful. Best line of the movie, "He's dressed like Jason Myers"

But certainly not the best. Brie is having second thought about marrying her horrible fiancé, Dolph; her therapist (Ginger Lynn!) helps her work through things. Brie, Dolph, and their friends head to a cabin at Lake Tahoe for a coed bachelor/bachelorette party - and things quickly go downhill for the attendees.

Slashlorette Party does have a few things going for it. Scantily clad women and naked strippers are at the party, so there's plenty of T&A for the fellas. Female viewers don't have as much eye candy, but the replacement male stripper amused me. There's also a decent amount of blood on display, and one of the naked strippers falls victim to a somewhat inventive twist on a typical machete kill. It's also only 79 minutes long, and I really appreciate the brevity.

Of course, there are many weaknesses too. The acting is weak and the story isn't great at all. Dolph is absolutely horrible, but no characters are all that likeable, so it's a tough sell to care about them. Some of the gore effects look a little cheesy, but at least there were on-camera kills instead of cutaways.

Is Slashlorette Party a good movie? No.

Are its limited strengths enough to recommend it? Not really.

Is it an adequate time killer if you're in the mood for a slasher flick and not in the mood to care about quality? Sure.

I don't hate budget films, but from the way this movie was shot from the start I had a bad feeling.

By far the worst movie I've ever seen in my life. It looked like a C- high school project.