Disaster Movie

This left me speechless......and not in a breath-taking "Shawshank Redemption" type way! I literally wanted to rip my arm off and throw it at the TV it was so bad. My husband and I made a bet with one another as to who could keep watching it the longest........the loser buying the weekend beers! I was quite happy to lose that night. I had no idea what was going on, it kept skipping from one sketch to another with no plot, no reason and NO POINT! Awful acting, awful impressions, awful film! Pretty much is what it says on the tin, A Disaster. Do not watch this movie. You'd be better off stapling your genitals to a table for an hour...it'll be less painful for you!

I am writing this in hopes that this gets put over the previous review of this "film". How anyone can find this slop entertaining is completely beyond me. First of all a spoof film entitled "Disaster Movie", should indeed be a spoof on disaster films. Now I have seen 1 (yes count them, 1) disaster film being spoofed, that being "Twister". How does Juno, Iron Man, Batman, The Hulk, Alvin and the Chipmunks, Amy Winehouse, or Hancock register as Disaster films? Selzterwater and Failburg once again have shown that they lack any sort of writing skill and humor. Having unfortunately been tortured with Date Movie and Epic Movie I know exactly what to expect from these two...no plot, no jokes just bad references and cheaply remade scenes from other films. Someone should have informed them that satire is more than just copy and paste from one film to another, though I shouldn't say that because some of these actually just seem to be taken from trailers.

There is nothing clever or witty or remotely smart about the way these two write, and I can't believe that some people still pay to see these travesties. It's an insult to the audience, though if they enjoy these films I doubt that they are smart enough to realize that.

Rating: Unfortunately there is not a number low enough (yes this includes negatives) to rate this. This deserves to be in the top 5 worst films of all time, right there with Date Movie, Epic Faliure...I mean movie, and Meet the Spartans. I would rather be forced into a 24 hour "Manos: The Hands of Fate" marathon than watch this slop.

Since the name of the movie is "Disaster Movie". The basic irony is that it's a ****ING DISASTER! A 90 minute **** flick based on pop culture and movie trailers. My god, Seltzer, retire and live off the money you made from your other below 3 star rated pieces of horse ****, please. Now when you do these type of movies, you're never going to get the "jokes" in 5 years, maybe even 2. They're just wasting their time, not really. They're just wasting our time. But whoever goes and sees this are brainless (Hypocrite moment) but bare with me, I got in for free and I regret it.

A free ticket, and a bad nightmare.

Do not watch this, support other films that are coming out today whom deserve it more.

Come on, do you REALLY want more of these? **** guys, just ****.

Really, I could write a scathing review of this turd sandwich, but instead, I'm just going to be making a few observations and points I've deduced.

There's just no point in watching these movies anymore. Does any reader out there remember Scary Movie? Remember how it was original with a few comedic elements to it? There was slapstick, some funny lines, it was a pretty forgettable comedy, but it was worth the price of admission. Well, That was the last time this premise was funny. STOP MAKING THESE MOVIES. PLEASE.

I could call for a boycott of these pieces of monkey sh*t, but we all know there's going to be a line up of pre pubescent annoying little buggers, spouting crappy one liners like, "THIS IS SPARTA!" and, "IM RICK JAMES BITCH" so these movies will continue to make some form of monetary gain, considering the production value of this movie looks like it cost about 10 cents to make.

Don't see this movie. Don't spend any money on it. Go home, rent Airplane, laugh your ass off, and then silently judge the people that are talking about this movie on Monday. Do yourself a favor.

This movie I saw a day early for free and I still feel like I got ripped off. It is totally brain dead. Burping, kicking in the groin and boobs all over the place. Lame. What is wrong with society, that films like this even get made? The parodies were all horrendous, and un-funny. The plot was lackluster at best and the acting was shallow, transparent and really quite unnecessary.

Anyone see "Idiocracy"? Remember the movie that won all the academy awards in the future? Well this is that movie. I have not seen a more rancid crappy film. "Date Movie" was okay, The Scary movies at least had decent plots, but this, this makes "spoofs" (if I can be so nice to call it that) for this year 0 for 3, with "Meet the Spartans" and "Superhero Movie" all falling flat.

Well I've wasted even more of my life typing about this sack of cow dung. So all in all, don't see this movie, unless of course your IQ is below 80.

Thanks, R