Pigs - Slaughter Farm

This is pure and utter crap, what ever you do, don't watch it as you will feel robbed, acting is terrible, the plot is non existent, The visual fx and make up are a complete joke. If this film was not taking it self so seriously it might just be slightly amusing, but the fact is they are serious. Plus there is no actual logic to this film, the main characters seem to react like their mentally challenged, so do yourself a favour and avoid at all costs.

It might only be a short film, but it still felt to long to me. Basically I'd rather urinate razor blades then watch another minute of this tripe.

worthless dribble!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

This has all of my favorite elements of a low-budget below B-movie horror flick - a cast of unknown actors and actresses, a rookie director, a budget of however many bills and coins said director could fit in both jeans pockets, and a film poster/DVD cover that quickly triggers a WTF reaction. The tagline, The Island of Dr. Moreau meets Hostel, should have had me running for the hills but I couldn't resist the cute and cuddly hillbilly porker with the pitchfork. Until tonight, I was a hogsploitation virgin and there's no purity in that.

It seems those crazy scientists are doing the Devil's work again. This time, they're performing sick and twisted experiments, slicing and dicing up swine and then splicing their DNA with humans' for the sole purpose of... entertainment? The viewer is never given comprehensive details as to why there would be any intelligent purpose to create a porcine-human mutant and it's probably for the best, considering there is no reason convincing enough. Lo and behold, the lab's dubious creatures end up slaughtering their creators and abandoning the compound they'd been confined to in favor of a nearby abandoned farm. He-pig and she-pig and their mischievous midget son have quite a mean streak, taking delight in abducting poor folks who have the misfortune of traveling through them their parts.

A trio of band members, Mark, Travis, and Tom, Travis's ditzy and well- endowed groupies, and Valerie, the band's manager, are kidnapped and made to await their demise in chickenwire prisons. The movie is tolerable up to this point, thanks to some good suspenseful, nail-biting scenes, and of course, healthy doses of blood-soaked innards and dismembered limbs. What destroys Squeal is the insufferable screaming, bawling, and the God-awful, over-emphasized hyperventilating from all but one of the characters. At some point, the director has a duty to step in and squeeze two fingers together in a gesture that says, "Tone it down, waaaaay down."

Other than that, the make-up (aka a pig nose and body hair) is decent, the acting is not that bad, and the DIY special effects are okay. A lot of the gore and violence is shot right outside the camera's view and, besides a brief sex scene and a pair of naked knockers, this is something one would expect to see on the Chiller channel late at night. Even though I rated it low, this was a hundred times better than I expected it to be and is actually more watchable than most of the drivel on the SyFy channel. I've seen worse movies, horror or otherwise, with a much higher budget. Michael Bay, anyone?

Like the headline says, please do not waste your time watching this movie. I found it while searching for some good ol' early 2000s slasher films and when I watched it, I was greatly disappointed. I wasn't necessarily expecting it to be that good in the first place but just watching it made me feel unfortunate that I had even wasted my time. Of course, I did get some laughs out of the movie, more from how horrible the acting and makeup was, but if you're looking for a more serious horror film, I really wouldn't recommend this.

After watching the first five minutes of this movie, I already knew I'd better turn it off and do something worthwhile with my time, but nooooo, I had to be stubborn and sit through it only finding myself wasting another ninety minutes of my life.

Even though the premise sounds good (genetic experiments gone wrong created vicious hillbilly human/pig hybrids that want to kill people with a hatchet or first have sex with the more attractive female species), the movie is a complete and utter, boring, amateur mess.

There really isn't anything good I can say about it, the plot is dull, completely illogical and predictable, the acting is among the worst I've seen in quite some time, - and I've seen my share of bad movies - especially the persistently hyperventilating Valerie gets on your nerves really quickly, irony wants it she's in the movie until the end, so there you have it.

If I would call this a "really bad Texas Chainsaw Massacre" rip-off, some people would want to see it anyway, because there's some supposed resemblance with that movie. But believe me, it's not worth your time.

Avoid at all costs.

Okay, so SQUEAL is one of the worst slasher films I've ever sat through, and I've sat through stuff like MANIACAL. This is terrible, amateurish, whatever you want to call it; a film entirely lacking in a single redeeming feature, and a waste of time from beginning to end.

The loose storyline is about a group of musicians stranded somewhere remote, who find themselves menaced by a couple of pig-human hybrids. These hybrids are nothing more than a couple of guys in cheap pig masks who run around. Meanwhile, the victims have zero characterisation and just yell and scream a lot.

There's some gore thrown into the mix, and a whole lot of darkness and shaky-cam stuff. And not one moment in the film is enjoyable, from the opening moments to the closing credits. At least in a B-movie you can usually enjoy at least some elements of the production, but in this cheap, derivative and nasty slasher, it's amateur hour all round.