Bull Shark

I've seen a few reviews about how unrealistic it is about sharks living in freshwater lakes. There have been sightings and attacks in the Great Lakes, Lake Ontario, Trinity River. Lakes in Louisiana and California. So that part is probably the only true and good thing about this film. The public needs to be educated, but since this movie is more an SNL Jaws parody (without the comedic approach) they really dropped the ball. And really, it's not even about sharks. It's about a small Texas town with corrupt political figures and a game warden struggling with alcoholism, divorce and being a bad father. The sharks have small guest appearances a couple times and then some plastic fins a few other times. Nope. No thanks.

*The people behind this film have a funny stereotype of Texas. But seriously dude, we're not a bunch of beer drinking till we fall over drunk people.*

That title would probably go to the other 2022 shark movie The Requin. Bull Shark seems to be in a competition to top it but just falls short. One can also consider the newly released Beneath the Surface.

The directing here isn't the worst there is but everything about the movie is unfortunately dampened by a hackneyed and poorly developed script that spends most of its time ignoring the threat of the shark to focus on the story of a struggling alcoholic, which could be compelling if it wasn't instead so sloppy. One decent performance might have saved this movie, making it salvageable at least, but try as I might I can't find one to point out.

Schizophrenic cinematography is on display with plenty of pleasing moments for the eye followed with so many others that look like they were done by film students that I wonder if they were shot by the same person. Some decent visual effects on what was obviously a low budget saved this from being a 1, even though the shark we see on screen is a Great White instead of the Bull Shark that the title and characters indicate.

A movie about a Bull Shark let loose in a Texas lake could have been great. Unfortunately it wasn't left in capable hands. Hopefully somebody else may come along and attempt to right the wrongs.

From acting of the xylemic variety, suboptimal sfx (not even Asylum level of film making) to the rickety camerawork, woeful script and shark aka a cardboard fin on a lollipop stick; much like the one the schoolkids used in Jaws II - perhaps the director was adding it as a homage to the original? Hmmm perhaps not, as his shark science was also totally inaccurate so I doubt he even watched Richard Dreyfuss in the original and that for me is unforgiveable as so much of the movie was a total carbon copy of Jaws right down to the rifle and bomb at the end; who knows but maybe it was a parody? Sadly the wobbly cardboard shark fin was not even meritorious of a giggle, just base derision with a soupçon of utter incredulity.

This one is a real cinematic stinkeroo, the kind of film you start to peruse the advancing timeline every few minutes and praying for it to move more rapidly - Never a good sign in my book!

The girl in the blue swimsuit with the terrible fake blood dribbling from her mouth at the beginning did have a nice gluteus maximus it has to be said but sadly even that is not enough to merit an extra star.

Just another shark dud movie to join the many others in Davy Jones' locker.

Texas Game Warden Spencer Timms (Thom Hallum) battles a man-eating bull shark that has made itself at home in a Texan lake, feeding on unwary tourists.

The title of this low budget shark-in-a-lake horror positively invites the single-word summary 'Bull Sh**', but someone else beat me to it.

Written and directed by Brett Bentman, for whom a Spielberg-like meteoric rise to fame is extremely unlikely, Bull Shark joins the likes of House Shark, Ghost Shark, Sand Sharks, Jurassic Shark and Sharkenstein as one of the worst in a sub-genre that has churned out plenty of stinkers.

The terrible script spends more time on the protagonist's drink problem, his failing marriage, and a totally pointless subplot concerning a corrupt mayor than it does the shark, which isn't necessarily a bad thing given how crappy the titular fish is: the CGI shark effects are dreadful, and more often than not, it's just a plastic fin on a stick poking out of the water.

1/10. Have fun identifying the comments posted by the director's friends.

Have you ever been to a wine tasting? You know how between wines, you rinse your mouth out with water and then spit it out? Well, this movie is like that. If you've just watched a really good horror movie and you want to watch something really dumb to get all the scarey thoughts out of your mind so you can sleep at night?

If so, this is the movie for you!