#float

I would give it a 10, if it was supposed to be a comedy, but it is not. I's supposed to be horror. LOL I'm guessing the writer was high in the sky, and I am not talking plane. Basically, a (am I allowed to use the word bimbo?) gorgeus millennial, influencer with her cellphone attached (she is floating in the water with it) and friends go on a rafting holiday, where the year before one of their group drowned. (You would not catch me in a pleasure trip where a friend of mine drowned, but that is just me.) I'm not going to give the plot, lol, but lets just say, in horror movies the likelihood is that people will get killed. Another viewer gave a 2 for the beautiful scenic view. I am not that generous.

I've watched four horror films in the last week or so. Skinnamarink, The Outwaters, The Black Phone (again), and this. It is not fair to Compare all of those to each other for many reasons, one being budget. While not the lowest budget here, #floaters sure feels like it is. Amateurish screenplay, directed adequately but not able to coax out a single good performance. While I would certainly watch this again before Skinnamarink, I hope to watch neither. Now that We've killed enough characters, here's the review: cheap, bad, forgettable. Sadly six hundred characters are necessary to say that. Wow.

I figured I would watch this movie late night since it was only a little over an hour long. Horror CAN be done quickly, though this wasn't Dien well at all. I turned it off 20 minutes in and that was giving it a chance from the opening credits on. Good horror can be done with bad actors and low budgets, but they skimped on the acting, like REALLY SKIMPED. Had a goodish premise and then Blake had to go and ruin it for anyone willing to give this movie a shot. The 3 girls were all actually good actors but the dudes seemed like they were pulled off the street to be in this movie. The creepy dirty guy was ok as well, then once again, Blake comes in the scene to ruin it. Don't waste your money on this like I did.

Right, well I have to admit that the fact that this 2022 horror movie had a hashtag in the title was a clear and present sign of something was wrong here. But still, as I hadn't seen the movie nor even ever heard about it, and it being a horror movie, of course I opted to watch it.

Sure, I wasn't harboring any expectations to the movie, so writer and director Zac Locke had every opportunity to entertain and bedazzle me.

Except he failed to do so.

"#Float" had a very generic storyline, if you could get past the annoying social media influencer aspect, which is a laughable concept to begin with. And the fact that there was nothing scary or interesting happening throughout the 76 minutes that the movie ran for, also just helped cement this as a waste of time movie.

I wasn't familiar with the cast ensemble in the movie, but there were actually some fair enough talents on the cast list, I will say that much, despite of them having virtually nothing to work with in terms of a properly interesting script or memorable characters.

As for "#Float" being a horror movie, well, that might be stretching the term a bit.

If you enjoy horror movies, do yourself a favor and stay well clear of this one. It just simply isn't worth the effort, nor the time or money.

My rating of "#Float" lands on a two out of ten stars.

The other reviews summed this one up well, and all heed a great warning. There's a reason this film found its free home on beloved free TUBI tv.

The acting is so appalling bad and uneven that it's distracting and it takes you right out of it. The stale and lackluster script follows quickly after it, down the drain.

Eventually, it's like they ran out of a script, idea, concept, or plot point all together and just found a tiny shack in the woods and settled.

Characters and actions/motivations are a strange and clumsy mix of confusion and unexplained undercooked contrivances, that lead nowhere. And bizarre decisions take over the plot when the script wears incredibly thin and realizes there isn't one.

This tried to think it was Blair Witch meets The Descent meets generic camping trip gone wrong or something. Except nothing much happens. A vlogger is apparently the main character. Horrible decisions and ignoring the warning signs, are just the start of trouble with this material. The rest of the issues with the plot bleed in to odd production errors/choices and strange camera work.

Throw in a random child, and entirely forgettable deaths (did I forget, or did they just not show anything worth-while I have no clue), and you're left scratching your head wondering why they bothered at all.

Without the # hashtag, I don't see how this succeeds. The film's development and execution is terrible, the actors have zero chemistry together. Its surprising the screenplay made it so far. Avoid unless you want an experiment in #tedium.