Schneemann

The original material the film is based on, "The Snowman" by Jo Nesbo, is a gripping thriller brilliantly composed with complex characters. However, this film adaption lacks everything. Frankly, there is very little left of the original story. The scriptwriters not only tampered with the plot, but altered characters as well. It is an entirely different story that is badly constructed with gaping holes in the plot.

Without having read the book, I'd imagine it would be slightly better with decent performances from the actors. Shame that had such an awful script to work with.

What annoys me the most is that this movie could have been so good... an engaging story by the best-selling nordic writer Jo Nesbø, a breathtaking cinematography, an exceptional cast (Michael Fassbender, Rebecca Ferguson, JK Simmons, Chloe Sevigny and even Val Kilmer).

And yet the adaptation is so unsatisfactory. There are cuts and jumps that break the fluidity of the narrative, the plot ended up so stereotyped that in 15 minutes I already knew who the murderer was, and then there were so many loose ends... And that ending is just empty, empty, empty. What a waste of potential. This book deserved a much more coherente adaptation.

How The Snowman became the film it ended up being will likely forever remain a great mystery of bad movie history.

The Snowman's director Tomas Alfredson has publicly stated that his movie makes no sense, is missing a large percentage of its script due to filming time constraints and generally has stated that this is not the film he intended to make but that's no real excuse for the sleep inducing police thriller we get here.

That The Snowman has been so universally panned and lamented is not surprising, as Alfredson is a filmmaker whose got run's on the board with brilliant vampire tale Let The Right One In and the great cold war thriller Tinker, Tailor, Soldier, Spy, but his not the only reason why so many were genuinely surprised by the downright blandness that was this adaptation of Jo Nesbø's famous series of book's.

Starring Michael Fassbender (whose literally never been less charismatic or uninterested looking and is now officially in dire need of a hit) and such co-stars as J.K Simmons, Toby Jones, Val Kilmer and Rebecca Ferguson, produced by Martin Scorsese, scripted by competent screenwriters that includes Hossein Amini and even edited by Scorsese's long time editing master Thelma Schoonmaker, The Snowman has all the talent in the world and manages to squander it in a genuinely frustrating and uninvolving fashion as we slog through 2 hours of an indescribable mess of proceedings.

The Snowman may not be the worst film of 2017 but it's clearly the biggest waste of potential and Alfredson's claims that some hugely important parts of the story weren't even filmed don't seem too far off the mark as characters come and disappear, important story strands are seemingly passed over, while the central story of a brutal killer building snowman with severed human heads whilst taunting Fassbender's alcoholic detective Harry Hole with letters and phone calls just never becomes even slightly thrilling or engaging against all the odds of it doing so.

It's a bizarre experience witnessing a film with all the elements of being something of note and just never taking hold on any facet of its being, Alfredson ads no flair or imagination from behind the camera, Fassbender sleepwalks through his turn, Marco Beltrami's intrusive score annoys from the outset, even some badly computer generated seagulls look like they've been animated by Microsoft Paint.

With everything and everyone in The Snowman failing to make a mark or even give off the vibe that they care, it makes you wonder if this was a case of no one really being truly invested in making a good film, or at the very least thinking that it would all just fall into place with the minimum effort exerted, proving that you can have all the talent assembled and still make a downright poor excuse for a feature.

Final Say -

Not 2017's worst film but certainly the most disappointing, The Snowman could've been (and really should've been) one of the year's best thriller's, that not only had audience's on the edge of their seats, but eagerly awaiting more Harry Hole adventures in what's clearly supposed to be a franchise set-up.

What we get instead is a movie more likely to lull you into a sleep, than raise any form of interest or suspense.

1 fork out of 5

Really wanted to like this because the book is so good. Had to watch the first 20 minutes 3 times. Got to the minute 49 the third time then turned it off in disgust. Incomprehensible garbage. Author should sue.

There doesn't seem to be a lot of love for The Snowman, which is a pity since most of the elements I love about Scandinavian crime drama are there: an overall unglamourous look; icy landscapes; a protagonist with emotional issues and difficulties connecting with other people; gruesome killings; dark family secrets, enough red herrings to fill a small sea, and a surprise twist at the end. In fact, had this been a Norwegian movie, then I think that most people would have praised it as pleasantly non-Hollywood, but now they don't now what to make of it so they give it a critical drubbing. Director Tomas Alfredson (of Tinker Tailer Sodier Spy fame) knows how to put the elements together in the best tradition of series like The Killing (Forbrydelsen) and The Bridge (Bron) and films like The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo (Män Som Hatar Kvinnor), but, to be fair, The Snowman is also the lesser of this group.

Much of that can be blamed on production issues. Apparently, Alfredson got involved late in the production, and large parts of the screenplay were not even filmed. Judging from scenes that are in the trailer and missing from the movie, editor Thelma Schoonmaaker (of Goodfellas fame) may have had a hard time to make a version that is at least coherent. Still, some sequences in the movie noticeably take their time for set-up, sometimes to little avail, as if essential parts are missing; other scenes, especially the climax and the epilogue, are too fast-paced to the point of feeling rushed. I haven't read the book but I have been told that Harry Hole is much more eccentric and complex than we get to see here. Michael Fassbender is an excellent actor, but I would have loved to see more of his troubles, other than his alcoholism and lack of remembering appointments.

The best treatment for The Snowman probably would have been an entire miniseries, preferably with Norwegian actors. It would have given ample exposure to Harry's character, his interactions with suspects, and time to explore the subplots that are now only touched upon, especially the ones involving Val Kilmer, Toby Jones and J.K. Simmons, who get way too little to do. It kind of feels as if the makers tried to cut 10 hours worth of top television into a 2-hr feature. That said, I do not recognize some of the criticism that the film is utterly incomprehensible and its characters all over the place. Undoubtedly, many people are only familiar with heavily Americanized remakes of Scandinavian crime dramas where everything tends to be clear and everyone is rather normal. I would advise those people to watch a genuine one from Scandinavia, with subtitles, made by local actors and crew. Enigmatic, ambiguous characters who cannot be defined by a single character trait, and a measure of ambiguity in the plot should be part of the deal.

A final plus is that the makers used their budget for some breathtaking shots of Norway's scenery, something that would have been difficult to realize on a television budget. This movie is certainly not perfect, but it has some great tense moments, and it saves you a ticket for a holiday to Norway.