Close to You

I remember going home to tell my family that I was transitioning. You know what, the conversations were not polished, as some reviewers point out, as if its a negative. It was a very real family figuring out how to move forward. It is hard to watch at times but I can also tell you it is hard to live at times. My siblings and their significant others all dealt with my news in different ways. They dealt with it differently than the characters in this film. The moments of joy also mirror my experience. They are the same but different. I recomend this movie to anyone who loves someone who makes a change to be themselves. If you don't love someone, maybe you should watch it anyway. It could be a helpful way to begin learning how to love someone.

I'd heard some wonderful things about this film from those around me, and at my local art theater. Knowing this was a personal story for Elliot Page, I went in otherwise blind, wanting to see the results for better or worse-- and in spite of the post-festival IMDb rating (4.4/10 as of Sept. 2024).

The film is clearly a personal one, from the opening scene. The low budget is on display, but this is entirely a compliment: character actors you might recognize from other things are made to feel like real people, in a real family, in a real house. Visually, not a lot happens. There are no fistfights, there are no fancy camera tricks. The camera instead focused on the emotions of the characters, focusing on faces, and sometimes just the eyes. If you let yourself feel what the characters are feeling, the film is as rewarding as it is eye-opening.

It can be uncomfortable. It can be confusing. It can be confrontational-- but ultimately this is simply Sam's (Page) story, from his perspective. His own emotional journey, not just over the course of the film, but how every day, Sam is just a person, living his life. It was indeed uncomfortable to experience some of the things that might be normal every day occurrences for Sam, but seeing things from someone else's perspective is why we go to the movies. I'm glad that Page and director Dominic Savage (who absolutely has a bona fide resume) got to tell this story, and I'm glad I was there to watch them both tell it. Not all of the characters are sure what to do with Sam, and some try harder than others, but no one ever feels entirely where they should be. It is a movie of the moment, and captures-- what I can only assume-- the current moment perfectly. 8/10, watch it with someone you care about.

Sam has left home - the small town of Coburg - moved to Toronto, and has transitioned from female to male. He now takes a trip home - the 1st in 4 years. On the train, he happens to meet Katherine, his best friend from high school.

The reason for the return is his father's birthday party, which allows the writers to populate the family with a selection of attitudes about the transition. His father is mostly relieved that Sam has found himself, and is no longer in pain. His mother will always remember him as her little girl, consistently misgenders him (not necessarily maliciously), and is concerned about his well-being, compared to his sister who stayed in Coburg and got married. His sister wonders why he never confided in her, when they shared a bedroom growing up. And his brother-in-law is transphobic.

Escaping the family, Sam seeks solace with Katherine.

This is a Elliot Page vehicle, inspired by his life. The direction allows him to casually show off his boy bod. This answers the question "where are they now"? However, after this autobiographical-inspired story, I am wondering what other projects he will appear in.

Using available-light photography lost one star by me. Too often, the subjects were shot with a background of a bright window, making it to hard to see facial expressions.

Don't believe the overall rating, most of the 1 star reviews must be from transphobic viewers. This is a brilliantly acted, very moving movie. They don't attempt to idealize a lifestyle or make it look picture perfect. It's raw it's gritty and it very beautifully done. I'm so impressed by the entire cast, they provide a perspective from many different view points. If you can watch this with someone queer in your life, it might help you connect to them better. Elliot Page deserved much more praise for this role, I hope his star continues to grow. I think it's a must watch for families going through similar things.

This piece is such an important milestone for the trans community. Those who claim the plot has left something to be desired have a fundamental misunderstanding of the point: the lived experience of a trans person. Anyone who has transitioned (or has wanted to and decided not to) will understand what this film was truly about. It will hit home in a way no other media can. We are all different, but our shared experiences bond us all together. The pain of a family who doesn't understand, who lay their own struggles with your identity at your feet and expect you to comfort them. The longing to be seen as who you really are, and the unprecedented joy you experience when someone you love finally does. The knife in your gut when you get misgendered. The strange sensation of being back in a place that has only ever known the old "you".

I can understand how someone who hasn't lived this would not be able to pick up on the emotional nuance. However, it's disappointing to see how low this rating is because too many people who can't comprehend it have weighed in. This feels like a classic turn of events in the trans (and queer) community. So grateful to Elliot and the team who made this.