AJ Goes to the Dog Park

There is a place for movie festival, homemade fodder. It is not in a mainstream movie theater. I don't walk out of movies. I stay to the end. I left this one after 30 minutes. It is not cute or charming to be amateurish. I expect some kind of production value, and this film has none. Worse yet, it's boring.

There can be something endearing about a movie trying and failing. I enjoy a good bad movie as much as anyone. But I cannot tolerate a movie that is a nudge nudge wink wink from its creators. Great badness comes from a sincere effort. These filmmakers seems to think bad acting and pirate accents are funny. Thanks, Alamo Drafthouse.

One night in July, a theater full movie-lovers bought tickets to a special "Mystery Movie" event with the hope of catching a glimpse of something truly worthwhile and captivating.

When the lights dimmed, we sat politely and quietly hoping that something entertaining would occur on screen. Instead, "AJ Goes to the Dog Park" played.

An audience couldn't have been more disappointed. Not a single joke landed. The theater was silent, save the occasional footsteps of the dwindling audience. It is not campy, or "so bad it's good." It doesn't make you laugh, or gasp, or even make you cringe. It managed to make an audience feel nothing for 79 minutes.

As I drove home, I realized that, actually, I DID feel something. I felt betrayed by my favorite movie theater for selling me a ticket.

Surely, someone involved in this work (I purposely didn't use the word movie) must have looked at everyone else and said, "maybe this is a bad idea"? I'm truly at a loss, I am saddened that individuals exist in this world that thought this movie was funny, or that it had a message or that others would enjoy it. I regret that I decided to go to a Mystery Movie tonight, I regret that the cinema decided to sell me tickets to this thing. I'm sad that I gave it a score of '1', because it deserved much worse. The only thing this movie accomplished was making 119 minutes feel like an eternity. I love indie films, I love it when a movie takes a swing and misses and I love brave intrepid creators trying something new. But the disconnection from reality that everyone associated with this movie must have truly saddens me. I feel sad, not just for me, but for the other members of the audience. I regret that they lost 119 minutes that will never return.

One of the worst movies I have ever seen and the only time I've walked out of a theater before the movie ended. The whole thing felt like a middle school class project rather than a real movie. Unfunny jokes, horrible writing, and a story that drags on. You would be better off staring at a wall for an hour and half than seeing this movie.

You might think that since the director and main actor have worked on successful and actually good cartoon shows that this movie would be of similar production value... you would be wrong. I am amazed that they were able to convince 20+ adults to "act" in this movie without someone realizing just how bad it would be.

AJ Goes To the Dogpark is a homemade amateur comedy which forgot to add any humor. It's repetitive, replaying the same gags and gimmicks over and over and over, making its relatively short run time feel like an eternity. Slow, boring, with characters that lack appeal. Once again: this is a comedy movie which has no humor. No production value, no script, no acting. It's easy to write negative reviews, so I avoid complaining about mediocrity and reserve these write ups for truly despicable wastes of time. This schlock would fit in well on YouTube or a freshman film class with other self financed vanity pieces. Save your time and avoid.