Private Princess Christmas

I am a Hallmark Christmas movie addict and give these movies alot of leeway. But as with other reviews for this movie, I had a difficult time with the storyline, the characters, the acting, the idea that this was actually a Christmas movie, the idea that there was any chemistry between any of the characters, and the fact that it jumped from one ridiculous scene to the next with no depth or continuity. I also had concerns with the movie's moral theme, in that a group of misfits were sent to be improved by a strong military officer, but instead they continued to cheat, give up and rebel. Due to all their antics the commander started to soften and give in to them. At that point all the cadets became caring, compassionate, and united. In addition, they were all able to sing in perfect pitch. Somehow there was a blip of unsubstantiated romance between the two main characters, then a falling out, a bunch of unrelated insights by several of the characters, reconciliations, and thus ending as all Hallmark movies do, with a kiss.

If there was a negative rating, this movie certainly deserves it. I'll keep it succinct- terrible script,horrible acting, has no redeeming qualities. I actually watched as I think reviews deserve at least a look. Do NOT WATCH. It is pathetically awful. The writers could have done at least some research. The actor playing Ryan has a Tony nomination-which in itself is unbelievable given this performance.

The characters are all poorly written and the actors are poorly directed. The accents are embarrassing. The place names are just stupid.

I repeat: DO NOT BOTHER WATCHING. You can never have those hours back.

It's a tale as old as time. A princess fails to train her Christmas tree-sniffing goat properly and gets sent to an American bootcamp for entitled people in order to prove that one day she can become queen. I mean, gee-whiz, again?!

Let's give Private Princess Christmas credit for the most ridiculous premise of the year, but not much else in this fish-out-of-water tale that is not royal in any way.

Wingravia's Princess Violet (Ali Skovbye) is the only daughter of the queen who might inherit the throne in this make believe Eastern European country of glaringly fake British accents. According to the queen, she needs some work to get the promotion. The queen finds a 10-day military boot camp in the US, that should do the trick.

The camp is littered with a crypto bro, an arrogant football player, the daughter of a rich guy and some other people whose story's just didn't land. Ryan (Derek Klena) runs the camp after rejoining the Army (maybe?) or just teaching. It's pretty loosey-goosey on the details and nobody is heading off to war after bootcamp.

As expected, our entitled princess tries to fake and cheat her way through the tests, but ends up revealing a heart of gold and some great American Sign Language skills.

We're light on love, heavy on fake accents and camo.

Cast Kudos: Tanja Dixon-Warren, who played Squibby and was apparently the only other employee of this elite camp. She was believable in her role and deserved her own story! Justice for Squibby!

Measuring Christmas Magic: None. Zip.

Alternative Movie Titles: First, let's discuss the title we got. Boo. No. Private Princess, sounds like a shy princess, not what I suspected they were going for-Private Benjamin. There was nearly no Christmas, so putting it in the title is court marshall worthy. Alternative titles: Princess Bootcamp Holiday; A royal salute Holiday; Bootcamp for Entitled People.

5.4 stars.

It's not the worst thing I've seen, I've seen a whole lot worse. People say it's the worst movie Hallmark has ever made, but while the plot and the silliness and absurdity might be adjacent to the worst, the music, production value and acting are not.

I don't rate the movie in my bottom ten, I've seen almost a thousand Hallmark movies. However, it's certainly in the bottom 5%.

I feel if a film is not technically the trashiest of the trash, for sake of accuracy, I'll tell it like it is.

The actors are okay, the cinematography is good, the music is good, the sets are slightly lacking. What is extremely bad about this film is the story, theme, plot and dialogue. It's a joke. But like I said, these do not comprise the full experience. You have to take into account, the entertainment value, acting, the lighting the music direction. So overall, this is definitely in the bottom of the barrel, and a lost cause, but not utterly garbage.

I watched this because I'm a sucker for princess movies. This one was such a let-down, even for a Hallmark movie. The acting was mediocre, - and yes, I know Hallmark movies aren't know for award winning acting, but this one was bad. Derek Klena was in no way convincing as a tough guy in charge of cadets. Ali Skovbye was a little more believable, but not much. British accents (or whatever they were supposed to be) seemed fake - I don't think many of them were authentic. Erica Durance as the queen seemed too young for the role. Watch this movie if you have nothing else to watch or, if me, you just like princess movies, but be prepared - it's not Cinderella.