MetalGeek

A research team investigates a newly uncovered ancient pyramid beneath Antarctica (?) ...and learns too late that they've stumbled into a Predator training ground, so they are now caught in the middle of the hunters' ongoing battle with the Aliens. Puny humans die, much xenomorph butt is kicked and lots of slime is spilled, the end.

Paul W.S. Anderson's franchise-crossover monster mash should have been a home run. The Aliens and Predators had been battling it out in a highly successful series of comic books for years so there was plenty of "source material" to draw from. Instead we got...a secret Predator pyramid in Antarctica?

"AvP" spends waaaaayyyy too much time on setup but once the two critters finally start beatin' the crap out of each other it becomes entertaining enough in a big,dumb sort of way. The set designs are way cool as well. I just wish they'd simply adapted the first Dark Horse Comics "AvP" mini series from 1989, which would have made a way more bad-ass movie.

...but hey, at least this one's better than "AvP: Requiem!"

"The Adventures of Paula Peril" introduces a two-fisted girl reporter who tangles with mobsters and a murderous religious cult. She's kind of like a combo of Lois Lane and Lara Croft, in a movie whose budget appears to have been about twenty bucks.

I was unfamiliar with the Peril character before watching this indie B Movie, which was apparently cobbled together from three short films based on an obscure comic book series.

I will admit that it's fun to watch Valerie Perez as "Paula" kicking bad-guy butt while wearing tight sweaters and high-heel boots, but the flick suffers from cardboard sets, silly dialogue and community-theater level acting. A quick glance at IMDb reveals that there are further "Paula" film shorts in the works. The character definitely has potential to become a cult item, but this first "Adventure" shows that she's not quite ready for prime time yet.

Adult movie stars Bree Olson and Monica Mayhem have come up with a brilliant "legit" business idea: they recruit several of their fellow X- film starlets to form an all-girl, all-porn-star rock band (with Monica on vocals and Bree as manager), then they hit the road for what proves to be a problem-plagued U.S. tour. As it turns out, their front woman's last name is very apropos to describe what follows, as egos, alcohol, and a pronounced lack of musical talent eventually takes its toll on the hastily created group.

This documentary was boiled down from an 13-episode Playboy TV reality series, which explains why some scenes are quite obviously"staged" for the camera. Still, aside from some choice T&A bits (which are naturally unavoidable to the participants'....errr... day jobs), "Tight" is not all that different from the shenanigans you'd see in any typical rock documentary (band rehearsals, poorly attended gigs in crappy venues, disinterested record label scouts, band members getting drunk and arguing) except that the participants here are better looking than usual and barely dressed.

"Tight" is entertainingly silly stuff but it's not exactly a shock when the end credits reveal that the "band" split up at the end of their tour.