Bikini Avengers

This is what you end up watching when you wake up 3:30 in the morning, wide awake with nothing to do and the only things on television are football games played two days earlier and infomercials. Then, there's this. "This" is an insipid soft core porn film that you want to turn away from, but then nudity comes on and you feel that something good is about to happen. So you wait. And you wait. Then you realize "Why is she called 'Bikini Avenger' when she doesn't wear a bikini? And why isn't Thong Girl wearing a thong?" and then you get more nudity. Not that it's a bad thing. Sarah Hunter is lovely to look at in her nude scenes, with creamy white flawless skin that Goth-lovers would swoon over, and soft, natural breasts and a plump ass perfect for, well, making soft core porn erotica. And she's not that bad of an actress, either. The other actors have a so-bad-its-good quality to their delivery, and Nick Manning's performance makes me seriously consider becoming an actor myself, because if he can do it, anybody can. How hard can it be? And then there's a nude scene and you think, "Eh, maybe not." Some soft core erotica films actually become cult classics eventually, but I don't really see that future with this film. It's a one-and-done film; see it once and you'll never have to see it again. Well, unless you want to clip and save Sarah Hunter's scenes. If you're into superhero sexcapades, you may get a kick out of it. This is what the 60's "Batman" could've been if Yvonne Craig, Juli Newmar, and Lee Meriwether had done nudity. Otherwise, pass on it or wake up 3:30am.

Suppose you had a surprise birthday party from all your closest friends and found out no frosting was on your cake? Well, Bikini Avengers is a film that feels like that. All the ingredients are there, but something's missing. Erika Jordan who was so hot in Dirty Blondes From Beyond is back without the spunk she had when she played a nasty alien invader. She is now a very quiet-talking masked superhero disguised as a reporter. Her newer cast mates like Jaqui Holland, (a batman-type partner) all talk like 14 year old Valley Girls on sedation until we reach nude scenes much like reruns from Bikini Airways, but again, sound is missing and covered more by music. Without her clothes, Erika's voice seems to have been dubbed in by Chistine Nuygen who doesn't have a part to play in this sequel either. Eric Masterson is back sprouting gray hair and a double chin, not adding much excitement to his quiet cast. Karen Hall is a standout playing the arch villainess. Nick Manning does well as the super duo's newspaper editor, very similar to World Wrestling's ringside TV announcer.

No pun intended - and another one of those softcore efforts. But with a comic book/superhero background. The newspaper guy is clearly ripped off from the Spiderman comics (or movies but the comics were there first). The jokes are a bit of hit and miss ... when it comes to the lovemaking, I reckon it is more hitting ... come on I had to do that, you know that.

The love making seems to have the music turned up to 11 - sorry if that offended anyone who is a fan of a special movie I am more or less quoting. I did skip them, to get through the movie a lot quicker ... so maybe there are sounds of love making too, can't really tell and not sure if that matters to you.

A lot of nudity of course - but this seems to be the only version of the movie out there ... if you like comedy with your adult pleasure, I reckon you could do a lot worse ...

Well... for a Z-film, this sexploitation superhero spoof is surpisingly good and amusing. The Bikini Avengers are a parody mainly of Batman 60's series, and it is pure camp, as it should be. There was a bikini cave, a bikini car, and so forth. Thong girl, the sidekick, says "bikini-anything" as Robin used to say "holly-anything. Their disguise, however, is not the one of a millionaire and her ward, but they disguise themselves as journalists, such as Clark Kent does, or close to Peter Parker, a press photographer.

It is softcore, do not expect more explicit scenes under the waist. The girls were sexy and their scenes worked. Congrats to villainess Jade Empress and her minion too. Off course excuses inside the script for the sex scenes were mostly as elaborated as the ones in a porn film. That was ok, when they pushed too much it was even funny. Indeed, the gags in the film were better than in many high grossing Marvel flicks. The greatest curiousity is that Bikini Avenger and Thong Girl's masked and caped gold and crimson costumes had no bikini or thong. Indeed, there are gags about it in the film. As a matter of fact, their costumes are much less low-cut than the ones wore by comic books characters such as Emma Frost, Miss Marvel, Power Girl, Poison Ivy or Starfire, just to mention a few of them.

The only major problem in this movie in my opinion was soundtrack, in the sex scenes, which is quite bad. Anyway, the song in the final credits was nice, in the mood of old times superheroes, and I consider it should have been used more. Anyway, an amusing spoof for softcore spectators who liked to watch Adam West and Burt.