La cama pornográfica

From the Lewis Bros., "On White Satin" is well-shot porn, but hardly worth noting over 3 decades later. Once sold on the basis of superstar Seka, it emerges as ephemeral porn that's mediocre by Golden Era standards.

Bucolic opening with lovely girls including one riding a horse turns out to be a stag movie that Lysa Thatcher is watching. Stag features lesbian content, while Lysa deep throats her boy friend in the "live action".

Femme narration announces the next segment, so we're watching a hodge-podge rather than feature film. Next vignette is set on a wedding night with a pretty maid singing the title song as she makes the bed. She masturbates on the sheets as two workmen outside peep. They come inside for a threesome with her.

Lisa De Leeuw is a honeymooner driving in a red sports car, heading for this Bates Motel, cuing a lame "Psycho" spoof. Their sex in bed, on those title sheets again, is supposedly the first time for Lisa, something of a shock to her loyal fans I would presume.

Paul Thomas narrates the next segment, as he helps two blondes whose car broke down. He gives them a lift and f*cks them in his flatbed truck on satin sheets (Seka is one of them). He gives Seka the sheet as a memento.

Back home Seka is invited to a toga party as film's finale. Orgy features Jon Martin humping her on a couch, she's wearing, you guessed it, Paul's gift sheet. In corny tradition (this sort of "inanimate object linking scenes & folks serially") Billy Dee finds Seka's sheet after she's disrobed and that's how it gets to the frat house where Thatcher was watching the stag in the film's opening scene.

I missed this one theatrically back in the day, but I would have tuned out early on, not being a fan of this rather lame format used so often as the structure of Loop Carriers. We've come full circle, with vignettes, now running 20 to 40 minutes long, have largely replaced features in 21st Century porn consumption, primarily via streaming.