El hombre del norte

I despise Robert Eggers' "The Northman"-truly, I hate this movie with a passion. And yet, I can't deny it's a visual marvel, maybe one of the most beautifully shot films ever made, so I'm grudgingly giving it 6 stars. The cinematography is jaw-dropping: every frame is a brutal, primal painting-icy fjords, blood-soaked earth, and firelit faces that scream raw power. It's a feast for the eyes, no question, with a meticulous beauty that almost justifies its existence.

But that's where the praise ends. The pacing is a slog-slow, plodding, and borderline torturous. What could've been a gripping Viking revenge epic drowns in its own artsy muck, sucking out any shred of entertainment. The story's thin as gruel, and the deliberate tempo feels less profound and more like a punishment. I wanted to love it, but the boredom killed me long before the credits rolled. It's a gorgeous bore-a stunning shell with no soul. Six stars for the visuals alone, because I'm not blind, just miserable watching it.

This is without a doubt the most Heavy Metal movie since Mad Max: Fury Road. I'm gonna crank up some Amon Amarth later.

Robert Eggers is one of the most exciting and original directors out right now. The Northman is his third full-length film and it just might be my favorite. The Northman is a classic revenge tale (very reminiscent of both Conan The Barbarian and Gladiator) that becomes elevated due to its incredible visuals, uncompromising brutality, fantastic performances, stunning musical score, and authentic depictions of Norse Mythology and Viking history.

Although this is probably Eggers's most accessible film (at least in comparison to both The Witch and The Lighthouse) that hardly makes it accessible to most mainstream audiences, which is probably why this film tanked at the box office. But if you love amazing visuals with brutal action sequences and compelling performances, then odds are you're gonna dig The Northman. Its story and themes may not be the most original, but because this film is so technically flawless, the experience that you get in return is well worthwhile.

Also, it is absolutely criminal that this movie didn't get any Oscar nominations, ESPECIALLY for best cinematography. I guess this movie was just too metal for the academy voters.

This film looks good, sounds good, has the actors to be good, but dissappoints.

Another film that is all about clips that look really good but on watching, it is difficult to feel any real interest in the story coz it is so rambling and jumps about..

Other aspects are just unbelievable, nonsense battle scenes etc.

This obviously was made with a lavish budget, visually it looks great, but it doesn't make up for the lacking of story. I couldn't help but compare this to 'The 13th Warrior' which does have a good story (similar era)

The music, if that's what you call it, quickly began to get on my nerves with the constant 'dirge'.

Another irritance was the weird variable accents, sometimes Scottish, bit of Irish, inconsistant mish mash.

I kept waiting for it to get interesting, but it never did 6/10 just for visuals.

The cinematography is fantastic and the soundtrack is powerful, though almost too much at times. But the plot is too simplistic which makes the runtime ridiculously overlong. The acting isn't terrible, but the dialogue is atrocious, wooden, and mechanically delivered. It would have served the film better had it been done in native languages (Russian, Slavic, Icelandic, Norwegian, Scandinavian...), but doing it in English gave it the feel of early Gaul. I liked the Tibetan-Bon singing in the film, but it didn't fit the setting at all, since that is Russian-Tibetan, not Icelandic-based. I think Eggers tried to be too expansive with his period-appropriateness. The film dragged a lot as it lacked any intriguing subplots or mysteriousness. As an action film, it was only so-so, since the action scenes lacked action, and Amleth too often looked as if he was flexing for photo ops and not actually fighting or killing. Too many dream sequences that just felt glommed on to the thin story. Sadly, an easy film to let run in the background until the revenge mayhem towards the end. Cool to see Bjork in a film!

I hadn't realized this film was directed by Robert Eggers, else I would've been better prepared. It's not what I expected, and it was hard to really get into.

That said, I can appreciate the film for its art. I would say it's a gem for cinephiles. It's like viewing the imagination of a medieval Viking peasant as he listens to a bard tell the tale of Amleth.

Great for what it is, but does not evoke emotional connection to the characters, and therefore feels less satisfying.