Ashton Kutcher en el papel de...
Adam
- Adam: Hey, you can't call me and tell me that you miss me. I don't want to have that conversation on the phone. So you can't text me and you can't e-mail me and you can't write on my wall. Like, if you really miss me, you need to grow up and get in your car and come and see me.
- Emma: This isn't really my place. I mean, who am I? I just have sex with your son sometimes.
- Adam: Yes she does!
- Emma: But, there is really no reason for you to bring a child into this world since you're acting like children already.
- Vanessa: That was really mean.
- Emma: Yeah, I'm mean. But you're fucking crazy. Because given the choice between Adam and his dad. Given the choice between Adam and anyone, really, I'd choose Adam. Every time.
- [to Adam]
- Emma: Do you want to get out of here?
- Adam: Yeah. Fuck this.
- Emma: Oh, by the way. It's the best sex of my life.
- [yells]
- Emma: Great Scott!
- Adam: [answers phone] Hello?
- Emma: Hi. It's Emma Kurtzman from Camp Weehawken.
- Adam: Yes. What is it?
- Emma: So my sister's getting married in Santa Barbara tomorrow and, I don't know. I heard your show was tonight. Congratulations.
- Adam: Thank you.
- Emma: I know this is random. I just, um, I miss you. I miss you so much.
- Adam: Ok. I don't know what to say. You're calling me because you're at your sister's wedding and she looks happy and everyone is happy and you're not
- Emma: I thought.
- [pauses]
- Emma: I don't know what I thought. I guess I wanted to hear your voice. I mean, I know we broke up but.
- Adam: [interrupts] Emma. We didn't break up. We never started. Look, I gotta go. I'm still at work. Have fun at the wedding and tell your sister congratulations for me. Bye.
- [hangs up]
- Emma: [looks at phone] Aw fuck.
- Adam: I understand what's going on. You're all on the same cycle. This is very exciting. Your uterine walls will be shedding for the next three to five days.
- Shira: Nice memorization. Did you Google that?
- Adam: I may have. Because you're women. And I think that's a beautiful thing. Oh...
- [takes out a CD]
- Adam: I also made you this.
- [hands it to Emma]
- Adam: To help soothe your womb.
- Patrice: It's a mix!..."Even Flow." "Red, Red Wine."
- Shira: "Sunday Bloody Sunday"?
- Emma: Adam. You made me... a period mix?
- Guy: That's so romantic!
- Patrice: Frank Sinatra, "I've Got the World on a String"!
- Adam: It's a classic.
- Adam: So, what's up with not calling me back?
- Emma: I'm not good at this stuff.
- Adam: At what? Talking?
- Emma: Yeah, talking. Communicating. Relationship stuff. If we were in a relationship I would become a weird scary version of myself. My throat starts constricting. The walls start throbbing. It's like a peanut allergy, like an emotional peanut allergy.
- Adam: Well, I can't date you either. You're not my dad's type.
- Adam: My dad invited me to dinner and he's bringing Vanessa. You have to come with me.
- Emma: No, I don't. I just worked 14 hours. I'm not gonna meet your parents.
- Adam: You know what? Just help me. These are really powerful painkillers. I can't feel anything.
- Emma: [slaps Adam] Feel that?
- Adam: Yeah. I felt that.
- Adam: You know, I don't want to freak you out, but I'd love to hang out with you in the daytime sometime.
- Emma: It's not really possible. I have no time. I work 80 hours a week doing 36-hour shifts. What I need is someone who's going to be in my bed in 2 a.m. who I don't have to lie to or eat breakfast with.
- Adam: I hate breakfast.
- Emma: Do you want to do this?
- Adam: Do what?
- Emma: Use each other for sex at all hours of the day and night, nothing else.
- Adam: [soundbite of music] Yeah, I could do that.
- Emma: Good.
- Emma: Dr. Metzner? Adam, what's going on? What happened?
- Dr. Metzner: He sprained his wrist punching a wall.
- Emma: You texted me that you were dying.
- Adam: It really hurt.
- Dr. Metzner: I gave him some Hyrdocodone for the night. It's a very strong painkiller. You might want to have Dr. Kurtzman here drive you home. And here is a prescription for an anti-inflammatory.
- [hands to Emma]
- Dr. Metzner: Don't worry, you're in good hands. Your girlfriend here is a very talented doctor.
- Emma: No! I'm not his girlfriend.
- Adam: She is not my girlfriend.
- Dr. Metzner: Oh sorry. I saw that he listed you as an emergency contact. My mistake. Oh by the way, I enjoyed your dad's TV show. Great Scott! It's funny stuff.
- Adam: I'll tell him you said that.
- [pops pill]