Bride Hard

I love Rebel Wilson and this film has such a stellar supporting cast, but the script is a stinker with so many plots holes and characters making choices that make no kind of sense... it becomes impossible to suspend disbelief and truly enjoy the film as an over the top action comedy.

You'll find yourself asking "Why would they DO that?" at every single choice everyone makes. That would work if the choices were campy or had some kind of comedic payoff, but they don't.

Why do the villains roll up on a wedding in a fleet of AIRBOATS - arguably the loudest water craft imaginable? Why does a woman shoot a blowdart bullet at another woman in the middle of a dance number, and why would a man who sees it happen find that an impressive and charming reason to hit on her? Because of reasons, I guess.

The whole film is just a contrivance of ideas taken from 100 others, and the mismash it leaves you with is a great background noise moment when you're vaccuming.

I am someone that is very easy to please when it comes to comedy. Give me an Adam Sandler comedy any day of the week, or a cheap made for DVD American Pie clone from the early 2000s, and i will have a fun time. Sadly this movie failed on so many levels...

So yes Rebel Wilson lost a lot of weight and her Pitch Perfect moniker of "Fat Amy" wouldn't really fit these days. That said, casting her in some kind of super spy role just didn't work. Not only her action scenes were done by an obvious stunt double, but i just couldn't take her seriously. If she had played someone who had to end up in a spy role trough some shenanigans and was always messing up yet being lucky trough comedy, then sure, but we meant to think she is an actual CIA agent...

Then the bad guys (lead by Stephen Dorff) decisions makes no sense, they never really appear threatening, and its like the movie can never decide if it want to be a spoof or take itself semi-seriously.

And the continuity errors... oh boy. Just to give you exemples without any spoilers, at one point characters are supose to be wet but dry out in 2 seconds. Another scene there is some kind of tube established who act like a vaccum, but there is something at the other end doing the vaccum part, yet later that thing is remove and the tube is still doing the vaccum part? These "goofs" are insanely obvious and really made me roll my eyes on how amateurish the direction was. Yet Simon West is directing this?

Among the supporting cast you got Anna Camp also from Pitch Perfect, who was probably the "best character" but thats not saying a lot. Da'Vine Joy Randolph plays a morbidly obese woman who for some reason is portrayed as someone who use her body to her advantage?? Even Justin Hartley, who seem to not have aged since Smallville and that i always liked, plays an unbelievable character that i just couldn't take seriously.

Honestly the movie just do not work. Its not a good action movie, its not a good comedy, it mixes the two rather poorly, and even the cast, wich is on paper pretty good, can't manage to bring much to try to save it.

If you want a good Die Hard clone done in the modern era, watch Violent Night. That one mix comedy and action extremely well.

I will go with a 4 out of 10 for Brides Hard. Below Average. I would had maybe consider a 5 if it was not for the (too many) continuity errors.

That's it. I think a.i. Wrote this. This movie can be used at negotiating tables to prove to exects why they need to pay humans to make movies.

No one in real life talks or acts like anyone in this movie. None of the jokes land. The action was pointless. And the final scene made less sense than the title.

The most unfortunate thing is that a lot of the actors are genuinely funny and talented, and they tried REALLY hard to make this even a little entertaining. I think I chuckled once at something that was not supposed to be funny.

I hope all the best for everyone involved honestly cuz this was a waste.

A Movie who's Producers told 15 mins into filming had to shift from an R, to a PG, for some reason.... At the start Rebel's all head shots, then she just punches people for 90 mins.

1. It is rated R, but they censored "pu**y" eight times.

2. Barely any one dies, after like the first 4, why?

3. We don't care about the bad guys attempted character development at the very end.

4. Her blood+scratches are so inconstant 5. She never uses any guns, because why?

6. Gold bars weigh 30 lbs!

7. The magical suction tube powered by swamp boat Fan?

8. Shooting a cannon BACKWARDS by corking the end (What is this Bugs Bunny?) 9. Her agency is the "5 eyes"???

10. Knock off Awkwafina Impression 11. Discount David Schimmer 12. None of their dressed get torn or dirty!

13. Chris did all this because he wanted to prove his fathers innocence, but.... " did it" 14. Chris approaches 15 guys with guns, firing up into the air and lives 15. Bad guys don't collect the 4 rings immediately because???

16. Accidentally blowing up the house.

As Rebel says "This AB-solutely sucks!"

Super Secret Agent can't balance her work life and her friendship with soon-to-marry friend. Luckily, bad guys crash the wedding and she'll have a chance to redeem herself.

... Well, that was terrible, and I felt somewhat embarrassed by everyone involved.

There's just too many things to complain about! From "actors" with terrible delivery constantly spouting terrible lines and talking non-stop, while nothing of note is being said. Emotionally flat throughout. A lot of scenes without a payoff or fun elements. Action is mostly dull. The mismatched sound choices.

The positives? The production is decent, and that's it.

Can't, in good conscience recommend this to anyone. It's probably out there with the worst movies I've seen this year.