Blood Relatives

Francis (Noah Segan) is a Jewish vampire. He drives a Plymouth Barracuda through the night on the highways of America. One night, Jane (Victoria Moroles) shows up claiming to be his teenage daughter. Her mother recently died and she used the internet to track him down.

The premise has some fun potential. It's a vampire movie, a father-daughter movie, and a road trip movie. It's a little odd that he insists on using Yiddish. It's supposed to be funny. In reality, it's funny for the first couple of times. Maybe if he's playing up being Jewish as a character. Instead, Jane calls him out for imitating The Fonz. I guess that's also Jewish, but they didn't make that joke. The humor is not developed enough. I'm not familiar with Segan. A better comedic presence would help. Moroles is pretty good as the sassy teen. This is a good premise, but it needs a bit more work.

First off regardless of a films subject or story, anything that's written, directed and starting the same person virtually never works out well. So why 'Blood Relatives' has a 96% Certified Fresh on Rotten Tomatoes, is beyond me... especially after watching the film.

Now lets talk about 'Blood Relatives'. Its largely absent of both foley and diegetic sounds, mainly consisting of just 1-on-1 dialog and the occasional Yiddish(or punk rock) ditty. Which from my perspective, makes the film just feel hollow. The acting itself and cinematography weren't bad at all, and I did appreciate the on location filming over a studio/green-screen production.

However, 'Blood Relatives' ultimately failed to deliver any meaningful substance, I'd call it neither a comedy nor horror. And again, why it has one of the highest Tomato ratings, with 22 Fresh critic reviews, is beyond me. What I can tell you though, is the theme seems to be founded in a mutual consensus of finding the film "charming". The adjective shows up in almost all critic review synopsis'. IMHO that's just a passive-aggressive way of saying it was bad!

Not for everyone. Gore hounds will hate it. Those who demand 100 million in special effects or big name celebrities. Those who insist every joke be obvious or have toilet humor or be about sex.

I was pleasantly surprised by this low budget indie. It has an off kilter sense of humor that quickly grows on you. That is, if you're willing to actually listen, pay attention, and don't demand explosions and piles of bodies or you get bored.

The writer deserves to be applauded. So do all the actors, and the principal ones have pretty good comedic timing.

In some ways this reminds me of the original short film for Things We Do In the Shadows.

I mean, for a directorial debut it's not that bad. But to be honest, it's kinda boring. I'm not an expert at drama, so I can't really pinpoint what made it boring. Maybe the lack of music? Maybe the lack of background story on the main character, that made the audience having a hard time to care about him? I don't know. I'm not the right person to analyze a drama movie. But I do know that a good drama is the one which doesn't make you wanna fast forward through it. And I did got tempted a few times while watching this. I don't wanna be a jerk, so I'm giving it 5 stars. But I don't recommend this movie to anyone.

IN A NUTSHELL: A vampire's loner lifestyle is thrown into disarray when a teenager shows up claiming to be his daughter, and she's got the fangs to prove it. On a road trip across America's blacktops, they decide how to sink their teeth into family life.

The movie is both written and directed by Noah Segan. But wait, he also stars in it! That always impresses me, especially for a first-time director! I'm curious to see what else he has to say.

THINGS I LIKED: This unconventional road-trip flick features two vampires played by Noah Segan and Victoria Moroles.

Yiddish words like Mensch, "oy vay", "putz", and "schlep" are used.

It looked like the scenes were actually filmed on location, rather than on a green screen, which is always refreshing.

There is some humor to make the movie more playful and fun.

We get to watch an ancient vampire transition into a dad.

Some moral territory is covered as the vampires discuss the rights and wrongs of vampire life.

The film makes a statement on how we all just want to belong and know where we came from.

The filming and lighting were good, especially considering so many scenes took place at night.

THINGS I DIDN'T LIKE: It's a slow burn with a "meh" payoff.

Not all of the humor lands.

Not that much really "happens" to propel the movie into more than just a road trip film.

Fans of horror will be disappointed that there isn't more action.

TIPS FOR PARENTS: Lots of blood and some gore Profanity, including F-bombs Crude language and conversations

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