Amityville: No Escape

Amityville No Escape' is another pointless found footage flick that centers around a group of so-called college students going in to the deep woods to understand fear.. Yes it's even dumber than it sounds.. Anyways..

There is also a subplot involving a video tape from 1997 that has some lonely ass house wife yapping at the camera.. Apparently her husband is in the military and on deployment..

This has to be one of the most boring movies I have ever watched, literally almost nothing happens in this film.. The story supposedly takes place in Amityville, NY - and I think the video house wife lives in the old Amityville horror house? But I may not have been paying close enough attention.. I'm just not sure..

Now to be fair I honestly can't say the acting was horrible, I think the whole cast was doing the best they could with what they had to work with..

Positives: A couple of scenes worth of boob shots.. So So acting.

Negatives: Terrible incoherent story.. Shitty shaky cam..

Do yourself a favor and avoid this stinker.. Grade: D

Horror Town USA

This isn't the first time Couto has made a found footage movie, with Alone in the Ghost House his first real foray into the genre. That movie proved he knew what to do and this movie is where he delved a bit more into things.

The unique thing about this movie is that there are 2 plots, alternating throughout the coarse of the movie. One set in the present and one in the past, but both are found footage. I have watched many found footage movies and this is the first one that splits between past and present footage, especially with different media styles. The present is of course on digital whereas the past segments are fashioned to appear recorded on VHS.

The first plot in the present involves Josh Miller as George working on his thesis involving fear with Michael William Ralston (Simon) as the main cameraman along with Joni Durian (Sarah, George's girlfriend), Allison Egan (Elizabeth, George's sister), and Alia Gabrielle Eckhardt (Lisa, their hippy friend). They plan to camp in the cursed woods of Amityville, trying to explore fear in various different ways. We are introduced to the second plot via a video tape, a supposedly "authentic" tape of what went down at a house in Amityville near where they will stay. While camping in the woods, we are introduced to Ira Gansler (Woodsman) who is looking each night for his missing daughter, warning the campers that the woods are dangerous.

The second plot features Julia Gomez (Lina) as a wife who is missing her husband, who has been deployed. She bought their first house which neither of them have seen yet and is recording her first weeks discovering the house. This plot alternates between first person perspective of Lina showing off the rooms and stationary scenes where Lina talks directly to the camera (or doing various things such as sitting at a table, doing yoga, getting ready to sleep). As her plot goes on more and more supernatural things are caught on tape.

The acting is great as usual. While majority of the cast have been in previous Couto films, Egan is a newcomer. Yet she's not a newcomer to the Ohio indie movie scene, staring in multiple Dustin Mill's movies as well as Eric Widing's Primordial (Widing produced and edited this movie). This was also Ralston's first time as a main cast member, previously just having bit parts. He did an excellent job for his first big acting role.

I only have 2 complaints, minor at that. First is that some of the past scenes have slight continuity error where the date does not show up. Another minor complaint is there were scenes where characters questioned something they saw yet they could have looked at what they just filmed to verify what they saw. Other than that, I truly enjoyed the movie!

This movie started strong enough and had some good, legitimate scares, for some reason some of the paranormal activity angles get to me a bit even if I know it's only a movie. Unlike what most slasher movies have ever devolved to nowadays with usually no scares.

This had a few good paranormal activity type moments with Julia Gomez. She was fun to watch and annoying as hell to an extent at the same time. Her aerobic workout bits were a bit comical besides a bit sexy also.

The more present day storyline was fine but not necessarily as strong, had some good mixed elements though none the less, and you didn't have a clue what was going to happen.

Those looking for gore will be disappointed as there really wasn't any, but the movie threw in some quick nudity bits right in the beginning of the film as a kind of quick tease I guess.

The ending of both storylines seemed hurried and incomplete for me. Like they ran out of money or time or both to complete the movie more how as envisioned. The 1997 storyline was more disappointing as the ending didn't make the most sense at all as it was unexplained exactly what happened even though they tried to show you.

It was refreshing they tried to tie both storylines to Amityville and the famous house unlike some of the other recent "Amityville" movies that don't do that at all or very well.

The DVD had a short movie called the Christmas Presence again with Julia Gomez that was kind of cool and kind of had a shock ending too.

I'm 15 minutes in and already I'm looking at my phone wishing I didn't commit to watching this. Personally I've removed the word ugly from my vocabulary, but these people are hideously unattractive. They all look like meth heads with the ugliest tattoos and awful hair. And that scene with the girl being topless in the pool and her brother is also in the pool with her and she's like "it's like when we were kids." No. No it isn't! Disgusting just like her awkward nips. The woman in the video is forcing her acting, which is worse than a kindergarten play. All thumbs down!

Just because you have a video camera doesn't mean you should make a movie. There was literally nothing scary in this movie except the hideous beard of the cameraman. Also....nothing to do with the Amityville Horror original movie.....used to rope people in...count me as one of them.