Cipolla Colt

Spaghetti-westerns weren't just Sergio Leone and Clint Eastwood, friends; they weren't even just Terence Hill and Bud Spencer.

I saw this film years ago on the Caribbean SuperStation, a short-lived satellite channel from Aruba. I found it weird and fascinating, a spaghetti-western gone nuts; but I didn't catch the title. Afterward, all I could remember was that (a) the hero was named Onion, (b) Martin Balsam was a co-star, and (c) a child in the film spoke with an adult's voice. After some time, I began to wonder if I'd just ... imagined the film.

Now, thanks to the IMDb, I can rest assured that (a) I did indeed see this film, (b) it does exist outside my imagination, and (c) others have seen it, too.

I love Spaghetti Westerns, but am kind of weary of the more comedic ones as most, to be honest, are rubbish. This one stars Franco Nero as a man who travels in a carriage full of onions pulled by a farting horse, eating onions, juggling onions, drinking onion juice, and using them in fights. This film goes beyond stupid and because you've got Enzo Castellari behind the camera, you've got 100% effort. The might is extremely silly and full of slapstick though, so be warned.

I forgot to say that Nero's character is also called Onion, and he's just bought some land to plant onions from a guy who we've just seen being murdered by Romano Puppo and Massimo Vanni and another guy (the three bad guys Nero went up against in Castellari's Street Law). They work for the usual generic big business guy (Martin Balsam) who wants the land to prospect for oil. What's not generic is that Martin has a robotic hand that for some reason is maintained by Hitler!

Sterling Heyden is the local supressed newspaper guy with Emma Cohen as the daughter who falls in love with Nero (he even uses onion talk romantically). He also ends up looking after two young kids named Al Capone and Dutch Schultz. I'm guessing most people will have stopped reading the review by now, because how many do you know like this sort of stuff?

It is fun if you sit back and let the stupidity roll over you. There's a motorcycle gang, loads of stunts, and way too many Benny Hill style chases. Romano Puppo and Massimo Vanni have larger roles than usual as the bad guys. My eight year old kid thought the few minutes of it were funny, before he slipped away to continue playing his Xbox.

Saw CipollaColt in Europe in 76. The title was translated "For a Fistful of ... Onions". Could never forget this flicker! Onions bring a big smile to my face ever since :D . Brilliant Satire about an otherwise SAD, SAD world. Who would have thought it was going to be actual ... globally ... in the 3rd millennium?

Not finding it back home, I thought it was censored - no pun intended - but browsing Franco Nero on Google is mum about "Cry, Onion!" ... I Had to use my broken Italian to find it on EU sites. Today I found it on IMDb - may God Bless you for bringing it home :) Here we sorely need good, healthy, sarcastic satire - it's the most effective gadget of TODAY'S SURVIVAL KIT. And onions. Plenty of non GMO CryOnions ... What else would wake us up and get us to recover from this economic depression and impending decadence, if not a good serving of genuine daily ... LAUGH :D

I went in this movie with the expectation of a mediocre-mid-70s-Spagetti-Western. But what I found was a weird, little trashy western comedy with an absolut hilarious surrealism and absurdity. The juggling scene cracked me up like not much did in some time. If your looking for a silly but still lovely little movie that makes you cheer up and laugh this one will be a good choice.

I'm sorry for Enzo G. Castellari. This very professional director, very able in stunt scenes and car pursuit, that sometimes in his movies lives for itself, have made this Trinità clone with Franco Nero copying Terence Hill. Is not a bad work 'cause Castellari knows his job but is excessively derivative and I think that in the career of a popular director wasn't a necessary step.