The Tomb

Bram Stoker gets the cheesy 80s action movie treatment in this early Fred Olen Ray stinker. This is an adaptation of Stoker's novel, The Jewel of the Seven Stars. Obviously this is a very loose adaptation (so loose no credit is given), but make no mistake it's derived from his story about a female mummy. The action scenes are hilariously bad. A single gunshot makes a plane explode. The music is also the pits. As for the cast, David Pearson is the star not top-billed Thomas Mitchell. Actually all of the big names in this have small roles. I watched it mainly for Sybil Danning, so you can imagine how disappointed I was by her one scene. It's a pretty boring cheapie. Skip it

This is not the worst film ever made. I can't think of what that one is at the moment. I'll have to wait for my eyes to stop bleeding.

Actually, there are two mildly redeeming factors. John Carradine, whose two minutes on screen probably comprised half the movie's budget, and Kitten Natividad dancing topless for about thirty seconds total. Yeah, that's it.

Another line. Another line. Another line. Another line. Is that enough for that ridiculously arbitrary ten line rule? Apparently not. Let's keep adding pointless text until this so-called comment meets the minimum requirement for mindless bureaucratic self-aggrandizement. Some suit trying to qualify his or her paycheck came up with this rule, undoubtedly.

...And I don't really know if that is saying a lot either. The Tomb tells the story of some stupid robber in Egypt disrupting the sacred tomb of an Egyptian sorceress, dead and yet still alive. The guy sells the artifacts found in the tomb, and the mummy(wearing low-cut outfits, breasts popping out here and there, and speaking as though she was picked up off of Hollywood Boulevard) goes to Los Angelos to get them back so she can perform a ritual sacrifice and stay young. Alright, the story is not too good, but the film is entertaining. For one of Ray's films, the acting is better than usual. Some nice performances by horror veterans Cameron Mitchell(he does a real fine job) and John Carradine in his five minutes of film raise the film from being strictly mundane. Throw in some great music and lots of T & A(a Ray specialty it seems...he even has Kitten Nativadad as a stripper in one scene doing some entertaining back-breaking bouncing) for extra measure. Let's not forget Sybil Danning too. Yep, she is in the film in the first five minutes only in what can be described as nothing more than a throw-away cameo. Her presence seems to be totally unnecessary, although I really am not complaining. Sure this film is a cheap B movie, but what the heck. Fred Olen Ray is living a lifetime dream of creating movies. His affection for the horror genre is obvious when he makes a point of giving cameos and roles to the likes of Mitchell, Carradine, and in other movies Robert Quarry, Carroll Borland, Kirk Allyn, and many more. He is not hiring them for their billing potential. It is nonexistent except to people like me who like to remember those fond memories of another time. He hires them for his love of their work. He gives characters in his movie names like Howard Phillips(named for H. P. Lovecraft) and David Manners(the actor who starred in the original Mummy as the heroic lead). It is easy for me and others to denegrate his work, and I have in other reviews, but like them or not...I applaud the fact that he went out and made them. Kudos Mr. Ray!

This is an Indiana Jones-type film that was made on the cheap (VERY cheap). It features hot young guys running about sets that looked LESS convincing than the props in a spook house! It also features an airplane that explodes with one shot from a pistol, a band in pharaoh head gear and others dressed like mummies or wearing a fez singing "Tutti Frutti" (presumably in the Middle East), BAD dialog and acting and one embarrassing moment after another. When the film began, I knew it was crap--simply because of the cheapo soundtrack. It's all synthesizers and sounds pretty much like what other cheap 80s films sounded like (such as "Warlords of the 21st Century"). And, it features John Carradine--a guy who would have starred in ANYTHING (including tampon commercials) if they paid him in cash! It also features Cameron Mitchell--a once decent actor who, by 1986, was seriously looking for work. As for the rest, they're mostly unknown actors (aside from Sybil Danning, who made a career out of appearing in low-budget films)....and I can see why. Overall, it's the sort of picture that would have gone straight to videotape or been seen on the USA Network back in the late 80s. If you like crap, then give this one a try. As for me, I couldn't even finish this one...it was that lame.

I've always been a Cameron Mitchell fan, but he was probably really needing a payday here. As always he puts in a superior performance, even with the material, and it's good to see him. "Death of a Salesman" it is not.

Very attractive "monster" in Michelle Bauer, and a really classic 70s/80s topless dance routine by two time "Miss Nude Universe" (1970 and 1971) winner Francesca Isabel "Kitten" Natividad that has NO connection to the plot in any respect at all.

But, like chicken soup, it can't hurt.

The movie is well lit and the cinematography is actually very good. The special effects are generally cheesy, but fun. I doubt this is going to scare anybody, but although predictable it's a fun film to watch.

If you love the monster/horror/thriller genres you'll enjoy this one.