Shepherd

Matters get to a great start in this at least with some nice special fx work depicting the inception of a war in space - Great say I and I was immediately filled with high hopes.....but it was sadly not to be for any initial positivity was subsequently dashed horribly upon sitting through this to the end. Frankly, this film is a mess; Irritating characterisations, a story that goes nowhere and poor action sequences do not a good movie make!

Both main stars, Howell and Piper are utterly wasted in their roles although the latter at least does appear to be enjoying his role somewhat whilst the supporting cast are made up of infuriating oddities such as an annoyingly voiced priest/bookie, David Carradine as a psycho ventriloquist(!) and an annoying soldier who spends half the film beating up on his subordinates.

There's really very little to say about this film in fact other than to avoid it - it's ninety or so minutes better spent on the toilet if you ask me.

A giant piece of crap, but an amusing one. If it had kept up the energy it has at its outset, and if it, you know, made any kind of actual sense by the end, it might actually have been a decent B movie. As it stands, it's definitely of the so-bad-it's-good variety. C. Thomas Howell stars as a "shepherd" (which was the film's original title before it was rebranded with a more sci-fi title), which is some sort of religion-based assassin. You see, it's the future. Great wars were waged on land which have driven the survivors underground. Now a handful of crazy religions are fighting it out down there. Roddy Piper plays the major villain, a Christian preacher who is sick of losing ground to a cult of women under the watch of Sophia (Marina Anderson). Howell is tasked with assassinating a member of her cult (Heidi von Palleske), but she and her son remind him of his dead family so he saves her and tries to keep her from other assassins instead. Oh, and David Carradine is along for the ride as a ventriloquist. It's all very nonsensical, but the silly (but even sometimes clever) production design is fun and everyone overacts to a hilarious degree - except for von Palleske who comes off like a robotic Jessica Chastain.

If "B" movies, tired and corny scripts, and golf carts dressed up as some sort of futuristic mode of transport are your sort of entertainment, you'll probably enjoy this. Otherwise, forget it. The topless newsreader, though completely irrelevant, did give a few seconds of amusement.

I have NEVER fallen asleep whilst watching a movie before.

I did with this one.

Avoid at all costs, give your time and money to a worthy cause instead.

Planet Earth has suffered a terrible environmental disaster so humanity now survives underground split in to different religious cults . What caused the catastrophe ? I have no idea ? why is humanity split in to different ecclesiastical factions ? I have no idea . Since the surface of the Earth can no longer support human life how are the humans able to grow crops in order to feed the population ? I have no idea . What sort of producer thought this screenplay deserved to receive funding ? I have no idea

SHEPHERD is one of these films that creeps up late at night on cable channels . The sort of film where you consult the IMBb to see if it has any merits . The number of people who've commentated on SHEPHERD on this page hasn't yet reached double figures and this is a film that was released nine years ago . Perhaps the people who have never seen it are the lucky ones ?

As for the rest of the plot it's very routine . Grumpy former cop Boris Dakota whose wife and child died several years previously meets a woman and her child and it's up to him to save their lives , almost like a futuristic western . Throw in a former wrestler who now runs the God channel , a fascist Christian bloke who's trying to snuff out Boris , a ventriloquist , some T&A for the sake of it and you've got a mess of a film . I guess after seeing this Neil Marshall's DOOMSDAY is possibly a masterwork of cinema in comparison