Rumours

It's very telling that the Wikipedia plot digest is one small paragraph, as clearly the script was too.

The premise is established and thereafter everyone is encouraged to just have fun and wing it, rambling on about their roles and responsibilities in-character, in the form of various raconteur-isms, that ultimately go nowhere.

There are a few nice moments, nice props, and it starts quite well, but as soon as the night fog roles in, it completely loses all focus and direction and becomes another 'and then this happens because why not' snooze fest.

Ultimately, an unnecessarily long exercise in keeping some artists in employment, that could have been a 5 minute radio sketch.

I'm sure the most pretentious critics loved it, but I just felt sorry for the editor.

Rumour has it there's a new movie out written and directed by 3 different people: Galen Johnson, Evan Johnson, and Guy Madden. A Canadian/German production, RUMOURS is a satirical look at the annual G7 summit, gathering together 7 of the world leaders who try to prepare a joint statement to address an unspecified world crisis. I really enjoy weird movies, but this one almost pushed my tolerance to the limit. It took a bit to understand the kind of humour this movie is going for. I appreciate it a tiny bit more now that I've had time to contemplate. Basically, it's a movie that says politicians and world leaders are more focused on drawing up a statement than actually taking any action. There is still one aspect of the movie I still don't understand, which I can't tell you about, just know it's very weird. According to this movie, politics is just one big circle-jerk. A few standout performances from Cate Blanchett, Roy Dupius, and Denis Ménochet carry the film. So much of RUMOURS is strange and surreal, but I feel like it's full of symbolism and metaphors. I understood some of them. By the end, I think I had a fun time?

For someone who is a bit behind on Guy Maddin (and yes, that "someone" is me), Rumours is probably a bad place to begin. It also makes sense, as this is a lot more accessible than his prior catalog of silent films (a phrase I am comfortable using without the addition of "tribute" or "pastiche", because they're just that faithful to how silent cinema used to look), so I'm definitely not alone in starting here -- though I may have lost some cinephile cred in admitting this.

Regardless of how well you know your Maddin, this is certainly a movie with a lot of personality. It's hard to compare to any other film released this or any other year -- although I'm tempted to name one particular sequence "a better adaptation of Color Out of Space than the actual Color Out of Space movie".

Every location contains strange colors and magical mists; the music choices are bizarre to the point of idiosyncratic brilliance; the characters -- from the inexplicably British US president (Charles Dance) to the Swedish Secretary General (Alicia Vikander) who knows the forest's secrets -- are delightfully odd, but sometimes irritatingly unintelligible. (Cate Blanchett's performance, which has been described as an impression of Sandra Hüller doing an impression of Princess Diana, is particularly bemusing.)

It is also a pretty funny movie. For a while, at least. It loses some of its steam and satirical edge in the second half, seemingly getting bored of itself. Regardless, I am eager to check out more of this man's catalog and deeply ashamed that I have not.

I was really looking forward to watching Rumours since the premise seemed original and the trailer looked fun without giving away too much. I still enjoy zombie movies, even though there are countless examples in the genre, because with some talent and unique ideas, they can still be great.

In this film, the leaders of the seven wealthiest liberal democracies are having their annual G7 meeting in a gazebo, while something strange begins happening in the world, with zombie-like creatures appearing in the woods. The movie is a satire and heavily dialogue-driven, which I didn't mind, and the bits of humor sprinkled throughout felt like a fitting touch.

However, as the movie progresses, nothing significant really happens. The characters interact and speculate about what might be going on, but there's no real climax. It's mostly talking and walking through dark woods with little action. Occasionally, the zombies or "Bog People Dancers" as they are credited appear in the distance, but they don't pose any real threat.

I understand what the movie is trying to achieve, but it's simply not entertaining and definitely doesn't warrant a 104-minute runtime. The acting was fine, though the inconsistent accents were noticeable but not overly distracting, but still worth mentioning.

Overall, I was pretty disappointed. While there might be a small niche audience that enjoys Rumours, the majority likely won't find it engaging. [4,7/10]

"Rumours" is a Guy Maddin film. So you need to know going in that it will be an absurd, surrealistic, over-the-top festival of craziness.

Maddin's first film came out in 1985. Since then, he has completed twelve feature films and dozens of shorts that are iconic among cinephiles. His work includes a short film starring Isabella Rossellini as a legless matriarch who sponsors a competition to discover which country produces the saddest music in the world. For another film, Maddin stipulated that during its theatrical release an eleven-piece orchestra, a Canadian castrato vocalist and a narrator doing voiceovers must all participate live at each screening. In a related development, the film was never offered in wide release.

In "Rumours," Maddin co-directs with long-time colleagues Evan and Galen Johnson. Evan Johnson wrote the script. The story centers on a meeting of the G7 countries (Canada, France, Germany, Italy, Japan UK, US) to address an unspecified international emergency. The group soon begins to draft a position statement, in lieu of taking actual action. Even this tepid response is sabotaged by the personal agendas of the participants. The Canadian Prime Minister sleeps with the Chancellor of Germany, in part to compensate for the emotional indifference of the UK Prime Minister, a previous paramour. The French President feels the need to emote at every opportunity. The Italian President unctuously offers other G7 members a variety of sausages from the inner pockets of his coat. Eventually, these "leaders" find themselves mysteriously abandoned by the support staff. They stumble around on fog-shrouded terrain, encounter an all-seeing AI tasked with rooting out pedophiles and discover an unbodied brain the size of an SUV.

Several major actors have lent their star power to this endeavor. Of course Australian Cate Blanchett is the Chancellor of Germany. Charles Dance, a quintessential Brit (Tywin Lannister in "Game of Thrones," Lord Mountbatten in "The Crown"), portrays the US President without the inconvenience of eliminating his upper-class British accent. In a refreshing change of pace, the other G7 representatives are all veteran actors native to the countries they represent. Alicia Vikander has an incendiary cameo as an EU functionary/apocalyptic prophet whose predictions of doom are somewhat less effective because they are uttered in Swedish.

Professional critics apparently are contractually obligated to swoon because this is (kneel and genuflect here) Guy Maddin. Regular moviegoers are more likely to just pass out from boredom. While this film makes a fair point about the fecklessness of many of the leaders on the world stage, it's ultimately a one-note tune that becomes tiresome. "Rumours" elongates material would make an inspired, captivating short film. But here, it stretches its content and the moviegoers' patience past the breaking point.