Shatir: The Beginning

If there was ever a film that could redefine the word "unwatchable," it would be Shatir: The Beginning. Unfortunately, this is not a parody, not a student film, and not even a fun "so bad it's good" movie. This is an actual full-length feature film that someone, somewhere, thought was a good idea.

Let's begin with the plot, which is so thin, even tissue paper feels thick in comparison. The film introduces Shatir (played by Arjun Sinha), a self-proclaimed genius criminal with a tragic past, a mysterious scar, and a fondness for sunglasses at night. His goal? Steal something. What exactly? Nobody knows-not the audience, not the writers, and probably not even Shatir himself.

We are told in the opening voice-over (delivered with the passion of someone reading a grocery list) that "a storm is coming... and his name is Shatir." Spoiler alert: the only storm here is a whirlwind of clichés, bad acting, and plot holes the size of Mumbai. Shatir goes from robbing banks, to hacking satellites, to giving emotional monologues in front of burning cars-and somehow, none of it connects.

The dialogue is a mix of cringe-worthy one-liners and motivational quotes stolen from WhatsApp forwards. Sample this gem: "Main dushman ko dosti ka maza bhi sikhaata hoon... aur maut ka maza bhi." And yes, it's delivered in slow motion, with thunder in the background. Almost every second line is delivered with over-the-top intensity, as if shouting makes bad writing sound deep. (Spoiler: It doesn't.)

Arjun Sinha, in the lead role, brings all the charisma of a cardboard box. His idea of "intense acting" is clenching his jaw and breathing loudly. He has only three expressions throughout the movie: angry, slightly more angry, and trying not to blink. Neha Kapoor, playing the "brilliant hacker love interest," is clearly here for the paycheck. Her only job seems to be looking worried and delivering exposition like a bored Siri. Jackie D'Costa, as the villain, laughs maniacally every five minutes-because what's a villain without random evil laughter?

The action scenes deserve a whole paragraph of mockery. Every punch is in slow motion. Every bullet takes 12 seconds to hit. There's a five-minute bike chase in which the villain casually throws grenades like cricket balls, and Shatir jumps over three exploding trucks with the expression of someone stuck in traffic. The VFX look like they were designed in PowerPoint. Fire doesn't burn, cars don't crash-they just vanish. In one scene, Shatir dodges a missile by simply leaning to the left.

The music tries to be intense but ends up sounding like leftover background tracks from a rejected Ekta Kapoor TV serial. And don't even get me started on the forced item song halfway through the film-completely unrelated to the story, featuring a dancer named "Miss Dynamite" who disappears right after the song, never to be mentioned again.

By the time the film limps toward its so-called "twist ending" (which even a child could guess from the trailer), you're just praying for the credits to roll. But no-the director adds an extra 10 minutes of dramatic flashbacks and a final line from Shatir: "This is just the beginning." Please no. Please let it be the end.

Bad acting. Bad direction. Bad story. Bad vfx. This could have been a good movie if good actors. And actresses were put in. Very bad acting from lead actress. She was. Trying to. Overact and flopped. The. Movie. Also a younger actress would have made it better. The movie did not have any kind of good story. The director was all over the place. He did not even know what was happening. Looks like he dreamt the story the previous night. Acting of the lead actress was really a 0 level acting. Guess must be her first time. To top that item dance from her. We really fell down laughing. Had to seriously close my eyes. I don't have tht taste. Nor would any of the spectators. No wonder the theatre was empty.

This movie was an absolute train wreck from start to finish, with zero plot, zero logic, and zero entertainment value. It was a painfully brain-numbing experience that tested every ounce of patience. The lead actress Reshma delivered one of the most cringe-worthy performances ever captured on screen - stiff, lifeless, and completely devoid of emotion. To make matters worse, she was absurdly miscast, far too old to convincingly portray a student, making every scene unintentionally laughable. Her lack of expression and awkward delivery made it unbearable to watch. By the end, the only urge left was to vomit at such cinematic trash.

The movie was allowed colossal disappointment plagued by poor direction and acting. The narrative feels scattered with no meaningful connection between the scenes leaving the audience confused. The lead actress was miscast as a student and jarringly out of place. Not only she looked 3 times older than the role demands but her lack of grace and expression makes her performance cringe worthy. Her item dance is equally dismal, awkward and vulgar. The movie needed a much younger actress to play the role of a student not a oldie. Her item dance is equally dismal, awkward and vulgar. The movie needed a much younger actress to play the role of a student not a oldie.

This movie is the flopped movie of the century. There cannot be a worse movie. No wonder this movie was booted out of all theatres in 3 days flat. Imagine just 3 days that's all. The story was very predictable and slow. Poor vfx effects. No efforts mad to put up a movie. More of a time pass than efforts. The most laughable was definitely the main actress who was playing the role of Akanksha, a college student. Can understand a actress being selected even upto age of 30. How can u even select a actress who is 50 plus to.play the role of a college student. Utterly laughable. This was the biggest flaw. Have some brains atleast. And this same actress doing a item song. Eeeeeeks. The movie has been greeted with empty halls across. What a waste of time and money watching this. No wonder this movie has made hardly 10 lacs overall in box office.