Citations

I was never really serious with one team. I was into the Mets because my Dad worked at IBM where he got free Mets tickets, so I was into the Mets ... then I got to Saturday Night Live (1975) where my boss has unbelievable N.Y. Yankees tickets, so he invites us to the games. I'm going to all the games, so I might as well root for the team I'm gonna go sit with. I became a Yankees fan for a few years. But now, I gotta say, I'm really rooting for the Red Sox.

I like to see people laugh who are normally serious. Everyone looks so much better when they smile.

[on preparing to meet the audience] I'm behind the curtain waiting to go on. And there's a spotlight shining through the curtain from the other side. They're announcing my name. And I think, This is going to be awful. And then the curtain opens and you walk toward the light, which is so like death is supposed to be it's weird. And then it's fun, and then you play.

'Have fun' is my message. Be silly. You're allowed to be silly. There's nothing wrong with it.

Time slot doesn't matter to me. If people want to see you, they'll find you.

The one thing you shouldn't do is try to tell a cab-driver how to get somewhere.

Everyone looks so much better when they smile.

Leno, Conan. They are both really funny. They really know how to land one.