Night of the Kickfighters

Rule #1 when making a action movie: never hire a guy who looks exactly like Howard Dean to play the lead. This DTV actioner does exactly that with terrible results (insert Dean scream). Bret Crady (Andy Bauman) is hired to rescue the kidnapped daughter of a weapons developer (Adam West). He assembles his team and goes to save her from the evil terrorist Kedesha (Marcia Karr). Somehow all this was extended to 90 minutes. A cheapo production directed by one Buddy Reyes, KICKFIGHTERS does have a few funny moments in it. This is the kind of movie where a guard has an Uzi hanging over his shoulder but jumps into a karate stance when someone surprises him. The best/worst moments involve Aldo, a magician/mercenary with the worst stage show known to man who is recruited by Bret. His skills come in handy when they need inflatable dinosaurs for distraction during the final siege. The oddest scene has Karr lying on a couch with a snake over her lingerie clothed body as giant Carl Struycken feeds her grapes and massages her head. Karr, who is supposed to be a terrorist from Oman, gives an absolutely terrible performance that sees her accent jumping from Latin to French at any given time. The box cover proclaims Bauman as the star of NINJA 2, NINJA 3 and NIGHT KILL but I can't find listings for those anywhere.