David Copperfield

I was being baby-sat as a kid. I wanted to watch basketball, but the kids who were the son and daughters of the parents who were baby-sitting me wanted to watch this movie. Their house had cable and so I could watch botht he Pistons AND the Bulls that night. But nope.

The next.2 hours of my life were spent watching this interminable and vapid grind that had no redeeming qualities and was so inane it made me as a kid want to take up drinking and take the main characters out back of my parent's farm. I can still hear that female cat saying "But Davey...." The Pistons game was a 2-point game and the Bulls was a 4-point game. Anyone who tries to claim "kids are smart" is a fool and this movie proves it. Why see Isaiah Thomas and Joe Dumars, plus Vin Baker, Lindsey Hunter and Allan Houston as rookies or the Pippen-Bulls? Lets watch some dumb cat girl constantly show concern for stupid David Copperfield instead.

To this day I refuse to read anything by Charles Dickens and I harbor serious fantasies about desecrating his grave. The only redeeming factor and why it gets a.2/10 is that I remember that I ranted so long, that finally my parents were convinced to just let me stay home alone and I think they realized that I was so into sports that I wouldn't try to burn down a barn or anything while they were gone and just watch the game.

I walked out of 'Windtalkers' 30 minutes into the movie at the theater after 1 Nick Cage cheeseturd delivery of a line too many, the only time I've ever done so. This was worse. It was worse than the pilot episode of 'The Nerd' starring Martin Short. It's worse than the worst episode of Scorch's PFG-TV. If you hate people, please show this move to them.