Crooklyn

Carolyn: Damn it, Woody, you bounced another check.

Woody: I thought we had it covered. I'll get some money.

Carolyn: When?

Woody: When? What do you think I'm doing right here? Gem, Let me just finish this music.

Carolyn: That's what I've always done. The problem is your music's not bringing anything into the house but music.

Woody: Gem, the money will come.

Carolyn: I'm waiting. I'm back teaching school again, and I am waiting, Woody.

Woody: Just keep doing what you're doing, Gem. Now you know it wasn't always like this. I made money before. I'll make money again.

Carolyn: I trust you, but you have got to realize we are on a limited budget. I am trying to balance everything and when you go and write checks and you don't tell me about it, it makes it extremely difficult.

Woody: As God is my witness, I want the best for you and the children. But I have got to do it in my own way.

[He gets up from his piano]

Woody: Look it.

[He gives her a hug]

Woody: Cool?

Carolyn: Cool. I went out and opened a separate back account.

Woody: [He backs away] That's supposed to get some kind of reaction from me? What is that supposed to prove?

Carolyn: I don't know what it proves. I'm interested in putting food on the table and keeping a roof over our kids' heads.

Woody: [Woody goes to the far end of the living room and sits in a small chair] Boy! You know, you really kill me. I mean, on the one hand, you come down here telling me about yet another mistake Woody done made. But when I'm sitting at that piano trying to do my work, trying to concentrate, you won't let me do that either. You got a beef with that. I don't know what to do.

Carolyn: You can get up off my chair.

[He gets up and walks about]

Carolyn: I don't want to hear about your mistakes, You keep track of those. I don't have time. All I ask you to do is to write down when you spend the money I am making.

Woody: I told you it was a legitimate mistake.

Carolyn: I appreciate that, but you have made that mistake five times this month. I just want you to change the pattern.

Woody: I don't need no lecture from you about how to conduct myself in this house!

Carolyn: I'm not giving you a lecture. I am asking you to help me conduct the business affairs of this family! You're an adult!

Woody: What the hell do you think I'm trying to do?

Carolyn: I don't know what you're doing!

Woody: I know you don't. Well, let me tell you, I got to be like a thief in the night in this house every time I want to get some privacy to do my work!

Carolyn: You selfish child! Don't tell me about privacy!

Woody: Selfish nothing! Selfish nothing!

Carolyn: Yes, you are selfish! I can't even take a piss without six people hanging off my tits!

Woody: You're a big saint around here and I ain't shit, is that it?

Carolyn: You can call yourself what you want to. I just asked you to write down the check.

Woody: I wrote the check, right?

[Woody sits back down at the piano]

Woody: I wrote the stupid thing.

[He gets up some music charts]

Carolyn: I think you can do two things at once: make music and write.

Woody: [Writing] Woody... wrote... a... bum... check.

[Gives her the sheet]

Woody: Here.

Carolyn: That's very cute. You remember to write it down before it bounces next time.

Woody: You know, you seem to forget, I'm the one used to pay for you and the children to go to Bloomingdale's and Lord & Taylor to get what you wanted when you wanted. You ain't the only one contributed to this family, Gem. You got to remember that.