Femalien

The title was enough for me to rent this movie "Femalien." When you hear that, you think really bad 1950's sci-fi pick with lots of bad dialogue and scantily clad women, right? Well, Femalien really falls short of that. It's not a B horror movie. It's not even a good bad movie. What it turned out to be is a really bad soft core porn. The dialogue tries to be humorous, but it's poorly delivered as well as being poorly written. The film also tries to be seductive, but fails in that as well, leaving me wanting the real stuff. Sure you see lots of well placed-boobs, but all the flacid penises cancel any iota of excitement you may get from that. Blockbuster, I want my money back.

Much like Surrender Cinema's many other titles, this is really a porno, toned down just enough so that it's not really a porno. This one, however, is Surrender's flagship title.

The main character, Vanesa Taylor, is incredibly hot. All the women are in fact. The director, Cybil Richards, shoots the numerous sex scenes very well. The "orgasms" are great. The plot? It's threadbare, which is good. You don't buy movies like this for plot.

And of course, no review of Femalien would be complete without commenting on the final girl/girl scene between Vanesa and Jacqueline Lovell. It is indeed one of the best lesbian scenes I've ever seen, putting most hardcore stuff to shame.

Femalien is a great bargain and delivers more quality than most movies costing 2 or 3 times what it retails for. Very recommended.

Apparently the lead female in this one got it in her contract that she only do a couple of "commercials" (soft core sex) scenes and did not have to do any acting of any consequence. So she "observes" humans having sex until it comes her turn for the big "finale". Needless to say she does virtually nothing to indicate any kind of anticipation leading up to her eventual participation (I almost thought she was not going to do anything at all!). This was the only surprise of the movie.

If your local drug store is out of your local sleeping aid, play this turkey and you will get to snooze-ville fast!

So many reviews, please read the synopsis or others for the "plot" details. Here's what's important - this flick is pretty much wall to wall skin, some decent pink (no spreads that I remember), and erotic fun.

There is a bit of filler to fast forward thru (silly subplot about saving a diner, blah blah). A sexy alien experiencing human lust is enough for plot - I guess these folks can't help themselves.

But Femalien has turned me into a real fan of Jacqueline Lovell, the pretty blonde who is actually a good performer who delivers her lines believably, and particularly Venesa Taylor. Venesa will blow you away here - pretty girl-next-door face, dreamy eyes, long legs and amazing double Ds that will have you short of breath. She's so hot, it may take you a couple viewings to make it thru the movie (get my drift). The scenes w/ other performers, including some mid-90s porn stars, are all adequate, but the scenes w/ Jacqueline and/or Venesa are stellar.

All & all very good for this type of movie, though I would have liked more pink.

Emmanuelle went to space in the 90s - but that wasn't enough. The Aliens really want to know what it feels like to have sex. While music is playing in the background - yes it happens. So they do send this good looking woman to us - and she is quite the voyeur. But she has to study us, right? Of course, of course - also important to paste and copy (no pun intended).

If you don't mind that or rather if you want it (again no pun intended), the movie really gives it to you ... I think I'll stop apologizing. The people here don't seem to care about their non acting abilities either - no excuse or apology given.

I skipped most erotic scenes, which made the running time quite ... well it shrunk away. It went as fast as travelling is with beam functions. There is not much story, but a lot of heterosexual romp or whateveer you would call it.