Femalien

So many reviews, please read the synopsis or others for the "plot" details. Here's what's important - this flick is pretty much wall to wall skin, some decent pink (no spreads that I remember), and erotic fun.

There is a bit of filler to fast forward thru (silly subplot about saving a diner, blah blah). A sexy alien experiencing human lust is enough for plot - I guess these folks can't help themselves.

But Femalien has turned me into a real fan of Jacqueline Lovell, the pretty blonde who is actually a good performer who delivers her lines believably, and particularly Venesa Taylor. Venesa will blow you away here - pretty girl-next-door face, dreamy eyes, long legs and amazing double Ds that will have you short of breath. She's so hot, it may take you a couple viewings to make it thru the movie (get my drift). The scenes w/ other performers, including some mid-90s porn stars, are all adequate, but the scenes w/ Jacqueline and/or Venesa are stellar.

All & all very good for this type of movie, though I would have liked more pink.

Femalien is probably among the most famous softcore movies to date, thanks to its undeniably campy premise and graphic sex. I don't know, softcore films usually bore me, but there are exceptions (like Staying on Top, The Erotic Witch Project, The Alien Files, Casting Couch) and this is one of them.

Part of the reason's got to be the silly sci-fi premise, which is about a female alien (get it, femalien?!) who comes to Earth to observe humans engage in sexual interaction. The movie doesn't consist of much more than 90 minutes of this femalien (played by Venesa Talor), calling herself Kara in a hilariously dumb scene, watching people have sex while getting off on it, even occasionally joining in on the fun. Well, okay, there is the subplot with the chick named Sun (Jacqueline Lovell) who owns a diner that's about to be shut down by a guy who owns a massaging company, but it pretty much exists only as a set-up for Talor and Lovell to get it on.

Femalien has a pretty decent sense of humor, which also places it above most films of its kind. Yeah, the jokes are silly, but they have a unique charm that works in its favor (and Venesa Talor is so gosh-darned gorgeous, you can't help but get sucked in by her character's naiveté). The production values are also quite pleasing, with decent-looking sets, excellent lighting, and solid photography.

There are numerous sex scenes in this film, so I'll give a rundown of the highlights. Let's see, there's the sexy photoshoot segment, with hottie Holly Hollywood. The other standouts include Venesa Talor's two love scenes, there's the first one with the guy in the diner and it's one of the best sex scenes I've seen, directed in a fashion that makes it both incredibly hot and romantic at the same time (the pleasing score helps, as well). There's also a very explicit love scene with Jacqueline Lovell, which is so graphic, I could almost swear they were really going at it. Nice. Watching Talor masturbate is another strong highlight, she really looks into it. As a whole, Femalien boasts more sex and nudity than most other softcore flicks I've seen. The usual movie in the genre usually devotes about a half-hour of screen time to the good stuff, but over 2/3's of Femalien's screen time typically features a hot woman in the nude or engaging in a hot love scene.

Performances are actually pretty decent considering the genre. Venesa Talor, in particular, excels as the hottie alien. It's got to be the naive and cheerful way she approaches every situation, which makes her an immensely charming and appealing character. She's also one of the hottest women I've ever seen, at times even resembling a young Elizabeth Taylor (but even sexier). Yeah, she's had work done on her breasts, but I for one think they look great and at any rate, are far more of a turn on than the ludicrous basketballs on Shauna O'Brien's chest. Venesa's also got one of the most adorable voices I've ever heard, so she's both a pleasure to stare at and listen to. In fact, some of the movie's best scenes are those that just feature Venesa casually lingering in the nude, whether it's out of plain naiveté (like in the massage scene) or after a bout of pleasurable sex. She just seems so comfortable with her body, moreso than most other softcore actresses.

Femalien sure isn't a good movie, not by a long shot, but it's an enjoyably silly one that can be easy to take thanks to non-stop sex and nudity. There's also a sequel, but I have yet to see the uncut version of it (which sort of defeats the purpose of watching softcore), though I clearly remember Venesa was barely in it, and that could only hurt the movie.

rating as a softcore film: A

Apparently the lead female in this one got it in her contract that she only do a couple of "commercials" (soft core sex) scenes and did not have to do any acting of any consequence. So she "observes" humans having sex until it comes her turn for the big "finale". Needless to say she does virtually nothing to indicate any kind of anticipation leading up to her eventual participation (I almost thought she was not going to do anything at all!). This was the only surprise of the movie.

If your local drug store is out of your local sleeping aid, play this turkey and you will get to snooze-ville fast!

FEMALIEN is a lighthearted, soft-core romp with just enough of a story to tie the numerous "love simulation" scenes together. Vanesa Talor is Gina, the titular -careful now!- character. She visits our planet in order to experience human pleasure, using her "powers" to assist her in this venture.

Obviously, this movie is intended for a very specific audience. It succeeds admirably in hitting this target. As stated before, this mostly-naked movie is lighthearted fluff, and it's difficult to imagine anyone being shocked or offended by it. After all, this isn't the 1950's!

The women are beautiful, and the various encounters are far more erotic than raunchy. If anything, it gets rather redundant.

Co-stars the wonderful Jacqueline Lovell as Sun...

The title was enough for me to rent this movie "Femalien." When you hear that, you think really bad 1950's sci-fi pick with lots of bad dialogue and scantily clad women, right? Well, Femalien really falls short of that. It's not a B horror movie. It's not even a good bad movie. What it turned out to be is a really bad soft core porn. The dialogue tries to be humorous, but it's poorly delivered as well as being poorly written. The film also tries to be seductive, but fails in that as well, leaving me wanting the real stuff. Sure you see lots of well placed-boobs, but all the flacid penises cancel any iota of excitement you may get from that. Blockbuster, I want my money back.