The Dark Power

Wow, what a cheesy movie this is! It starts off looking like it's gonna be a backwoods slasher, with the camera following dogs running through the woods. It then gets a bit boring and follows the story of some girls moving into some house haunted by Indian spirits. We then get plenty of shots of one partially clad girl and another naked girl in the bath. It suddenly gets really cheesy when the "Zombie Indians" arise from the earth and start terrorising the girls. We even get a samurai Indian.

This movie starts off pretty boring although I did find the story of the four Indians who buried themselves alive quite interesting. Once the Indian zombies (or whatever you want to call them for they aren't technically zombies) start terrorising the girls is when all the fun begins. This is not a special flick and can't be taken seriously, it's just something fun to watch when you're bored or when you're drinking with friends. I can't help thinking though that it would have worked better as a short story because the first half is tediously boring.

There's no use belaboring all that's wrong with this movie, as it is pretty much everything and other reviewers have already done so. Instead, I want to champion this mess as it strikes points in the entertainment department, which is what counts. And the "Toltecs" don't really look that bad-not that good, but not that bad or at least about as good as Neon Maniacs. The attempts at humor are definitely the worst thing about it, though, as generally horror and comedy are a tough mix and hardly anyone ever gets it right. A nice study in 80's interior decorating, as well.

This was my first movie as "Gaffer," or Chief Lighting Technician, and boy does it show. My apologies to all viewers! Director-Producer Phil Smoot, is one of the nicest guys in the film business, however, and he constantly encouraged everyone to do their best on this little film.

One of my fondest memories was working with Lash LaRue. Lash was a consummate professional, full of great stories and patient with our inexperienced crew. I'll never forget how one night, waiting what seemed like hours for a shot to be set up, Lash just sat on an applebox, casually flipping his ever-present whip. There was a roll of toilet paper hanging from the handle of the tripod head mounted on the camera dolly. Lash would flick that whip of his, neatly tearing off one sheet of TP at a time. There was a little pile of single toilet paper sheets, steadily growing as time passed by.

Funny how little memories stay with you.

You like a good time with a whip? Look no further than the cheesy, but charm-ridden 80s horror "The Dark Power". What is an interesting set-up (the story's background is well-devised), eventually makes way to its ridiculous writing, low-brow dialogues and goofy, lightweight execution with a lot whip-cracking and wise-cracks ("Feel my whip you son of a b!tch") thanks to legendary B-western star Lash La Rue. Still this low- budget regional horror was lot more entertaining than it deserved to be… maybe more so unintentional, but entertaining nonetheless. Just listen to what comes out of these character's mouths… its rib-tickling (especially from the red-neck woman)… but it doesn't break loose until a good hour when our four evil Toltec zombie sorcerers come to terrorise some college coeds. For the first hour we got to listen to boring, if exaggerated exchanges, whip talk and numerous legends and theories involving the house on Totem Hill where the girls have moved into. At least you got an attractive buxom cast in Anna Lane Tatum, Mary Dalton & Cynthia Bailey. Then it turns crazy with plenty of hysterical screaming and "Benny Hill" chases, as now I don't know what was going on. You can see were most of the money went to though, as the effects are actually well staged and there is one very memorable face-lift. Too bad these zombie sorcerers looked and acted rather stooge-like, than anything truly threatening. Even watching La Rue go up against one of these sorcerers with his whip -- made out of materials from the four corners of the world was a battle of epic proportions. Watch as these two standoff as they go ahead whipping each other in turns, one a pure amateur while the other a master. Crack that whip! It was hard to tell if director/writer Phil Smoot was trying to be funny or not, but this slapdash effort is playful enough. Now that music score was like something out of an old-fashion western film… it even sounded like if someone's mobile was going off.

Wow... I suspected this one to be bad... But now I find myself just at a loss for words... Honestly, no words of mine can do this movie any justice...

I'll try to say something anyway...

This truly is one unique gem. One of the worst kind.

Lash La Rue - given his background as an actor - doing a whip-fight with a Toltec sorcerer-zombie during the movie's climax...??? A true stroke of genius, without a doubt.

It rarely happens that I laugh out loud when watching a movie alone. It happened numerous times with this one.

The accents of the actors, man, the accents... And the dialogues I heard them speak... And the acting itself... I just couldn't believe what I was hearing.

That fat uncle farting so loudly (when walking up to the house together with his little nephew) for no apparent reason whatsoever...

Tits! Yes, there's titties! And female ass! There's even a naked chick in a bathtub sipping a beer...

That one "stretch his mouth over his face"-kill was the bomb! A true highlight.

The comedy-aspects were just totally bonkers. I just couldn't believe what I was seeing and hearing. For a while I even thought that they were unintentional, shaking my head in disbelief. But about halfway in the movie, I started to get the bigger picture. Guess it took me half a movie to dumb-down half of my brain, to finally get it.

I had a really hard time believing this movie... But it's good, really, I think. It had one black chick walking up to a very tiny cupboard, opening it and then saying "Wooow, look at all the storage space!". And she said it like she meant it. I mean, that's good dialogue and good acting, right?

Oh, and perhaps needless to say: Lash La Rue's whip-skills suck major ass in THE DARK POWER. It's really sad and pathetic to behold. That's all part of the comedy, of course. Or wait, I might be wrong. No, yes, I'm wrong. Lash La Rue was amazing with the whip! It was the editor's fault. He messed it up, cutting his lashes together and all. Or wait, it might have been the camera operator. He filmed from the wrong angles... Then why didn't Phil Smoot say anything? That's it, it's the director's fault.

But it's a good movie.

I'm just gonna quit talking about it. I have nothing meaningful to say anyway, except for the fact that I hope my brain will recover from this experience... some time soon.