Ercole l'invincibile

Super-buffed bodybuilder, Dan Vadis, as Argolese, certainly made for a mighty impressive son of Hercules, even though, according to ancient legend, Hercules never had any sons.

As our story in this Italian import unfolds - Argolese falls head-over-heels in love with Telca, daughter of King Tedaeo, whose great kingdom is being held in thrall by the fierce army forces of the evil queen, Etel.

Somewhere along the way Argolese (accompanied by his chubby, comic sidekick, Barbar), manages to fight off attacks from lions, bears, and even a nasty-tempered dragon, too.

Following his brief stint as a son of Hercules, chiseled muscleman Dan Vadis (1938-1987) went on to appear in 3 Clint Eastwood films - "High Plains Drifter", "Bronco Billy" and "Any Which Way You Can".

Take all the "Hercules" movies and boil them down to a series of plot essentials and you'll come up with something close to this movie. It has the muscular hero whose hairless chest is almost constantly on display and whose favorite wardrobe items are mini-mini-skirts and lace-up boots. The hero fights a few real beasts -- a lion and a bear -- as well as a mythical one: a dragon. He acquires a chubby, timorous sidekick who provides comic relief. He falls in love with the daughter of a king whose kingdom is taken over by a wicked queen. The hero becomes this queen's captive. She orders him to be pulled apart, wishbone-style, by teams of wild animals. (Elephants, this time, instead of horses.) The hero emerges unscathed from this ordeal. The queen falls in love with him but he remains true to the deposed king's daughter. The queen's slaves rise in revolt and her city is destroyed by a wave of lava. The hero and the king's daughter walk hand-in-hand to the cheers of the liberated citizenry.

So, if you see this movie, you've seen virtually all the other "Hercules" movies!

Dan Vadis lacks Steve Reeves' looks and charisma but he's in his physical prime here, looking appropriately brawny but not muscle-bound. Particularly noteworthy are his silver-dollar-sized nipples which punctuate his chest like a pair of decorative decals.

Ken Clark lists this movie on his filmography and the credits list a "Ken Klark" but if he's in here, he's hard to spot. Possibly he plays the evil general with the Fu Manchu make-up?

HERCULES THE INVINCIBLE stars Dan Vadis as everyone's favorite pile of muscles.

Watch! As Hercules battles a lion, pelting it with boulders! Tossing them as though they were made of papier mache!

See! Hercules reduce a dragon to cold cuts, in five seconds flat!

Witness! The mighty Hercules save enslaved people from their eeevil king!

Stand agog! While Big H bends iron bars like rubber!

Indeed, men are crushed, as big heavy things are thrown all over the place! Hercules does all of this while sporting the latest in earth tone mini-dresses!

Of course, there's also an obligatory "test of strength". This time, involving elephants! Annnd, the final, apocalyptic battle must not be missed!

A later entry in the genre, but worth seeing for the diehard devotee...

Sword and Sandal films are perhaps the most nerve-wracking movies to try and track down. They usually have numerous different titles, versions and edits. This one is a prime example. Many of the reviews here trashing it for "stealing scenes" from other flicks (including the iconic 1958 Hercules starring Steve Reeves) are actually reviewing the more commonly available US TV Edit by Joseph E Levine which did in fact replace scenes from this flick with that previous one, which he also did US distribution for. In such a case when you are literally viewing half the movie, not just the edits but the chopping off of half of the screen to get a cinemascopic picture to fit to a 4x3 TV, one's assessment can be unfairly ravaged because you are only seeing fragments of what a movie is meant to be! I was fortunate enough to catch the original and superior Italian version which is likely to please anyone who finds a title like "Hercules The Invincible" tantalizing enough to merit a watch in the first place. Although the Italian version is missing the groovy narration added to the US Version - guaranteed to take you back to your childhood living room floor in front of the old TV set - it is an overall better viewing experience.

The soundtrack truly has beauty this movie almost doesn't deserve. This flick has Ercole fighting against a lion (to save the princess) and a bear, who follows the buffo for the honey the bad guys have smeared on his face before they tried to sacrifice him. There's also a scene where Vadis has to withstand 4 (!) elephants who try to tear him apart. The dragon-fight is taken as footage from the movie "Le fatiche d'Ercole", and the dancing scenes are also obviously "stolen" from another Italian masterpiece. You see Vadis running around in the caves of the cruel subterranean people (who love to sacrifice kids in order to gain their youth and women for their beauty) and beating up their soldiers, a cowardly comic relief character at his side who presents a contrast to Herc's unfailing braveness. The complete second half of the movie plays in the caves and becomes a little tiresome after a while. The opening sequence of the film is perfect though...in its own way.