La Secte

The Last Sect is about a group of female vampires that have been roaming the earth for some time, the last vampire sect in existence. Sydney is an artist that gets drawn into the sect by Anastasia, the head vampire, who sees in Sydney the future of the sect. Carradine plays the vampire hunter Van Helsing who tries to stop the sect before it can indoctrinate Sydney. The vampires have a website that transmits live feeds of the vamps biting a helpless male trussed up on a table. People pay to get extras and give their name, address, and blood type of course. Some lesbian soft porn and some soft bondage. Slow moving most of the way through, but some pretty good surrealistic scenes.

Eleven minutes of this was eleven minutes too much. I wish I had a time machine, so I could go back in time and find the script for this movie. I would lock it in a lead box and throw it in the sea. The really deep part of the sea. Apparently I have to write ten lines for this to count as a review. This already means that I have now wasted fourteen minutes of my life on this excrement. If anyone reading this enjoys quality cheap Canadian horror, look no further than the classic Ginger Snaps - a cracking werewolf movie from the nineties. Now that is how you make a cheap, sexy horror film. The Last Sect? More like The Last Sh*t. No wonder David Carradine decided to kill himself. I feel like heading for the cupboard myself, and I only had to watch part of this muck.

The journalist Sydney St. James (Natalie Brown) is writing an article for the magazine where she works about the on-line dating agency Artemis that is specialized in women. She schedules an interview with the owner of Artemis, Anna (Deborah Odell), and she visits the mysterious woman with her photographer Sam (Sebastien Roberts), who is fascinated by a site called Vampire Web. Sidney feels a great attraction for Anna, who is actually an ancient vampire called Anastasia. Meanwhile the vampire hunter Dr. Abraham Van Helsing (David Carradine) is advised by his assistant Tone (Jordan Van Dyck) about the correlation between Artemis and the Vampire Web, and Van Helsing explains that in every turn of millennium, the vampire sect needs to regenerate, using a woman for this purpose. Van Helsing calls his partner Karpov (Julian Richings) and together they go to Artemis to fight against Anastasia and her sect.

I bought this DVD first because I love vampire movies; then the art of the cover of the DVD is extremely attractive; and last but not the least, the name of David Carradine in the credits is a plus. Yesterday night, my wife and I tried to watch this movie but we took many naps so boring it was, and in the end of about 45 minutes running time, we decided to stop "The Last Sect" and watch another one. Today in the end of the afternoon, I have decided to watch this movie again from the very beginning (my wife simply gave up), and I could prove that it is one of the worst vampire movies I have ever seen. The story has a terrible screenplay that develops the plot in a very low pace in three or four locations without the atmosphere of a vampire movie. David Carradine seems to be bored with his lines and the weird Jordan Van Dyck, whose character seems to be a gay living with Dr. Van Helsing but never his assistant. The story has no horror, no tension, no suspense, only some lesbian daydreams and Internet footages with the classic vampires. The lead actresses (Natalie Brown and Deborah Odell) are sexy and gorgeous, but even their sex scenes are boring. In the end, "The Last Sect" is recommended for insomniacs and more effective than sleeping pills. My vote is three.

Title (Brazil): "A Última Seita" ("The Last Sect")

It's not the worst vampire flick, but it could have been so much better.

First, it was slow. I mean really slow. All that yakking in Van Helsing's (David Carradine) house just really didn't add much. They could have cut half of it to add more vampette action.

They had some gorgeous vampettes and two really hot leads - Natalie Brown (Dawn of the Dead) and Deborah Odell. The dream sequences were hot, but they could have been really hot and given us a reason to love this movie.

And, please, Julian Richings (X-Men: The Last Stand , Saw IV, The Red Violin) was so obnoxious that you cheered for the vampires. Nobody kills vampires without breaking a sweat. Make it real folks.

Anybody for a remake?

The Last Sect looked to have potential and features some good acting, but ultimately it doesn't deliver. As others have pointed out, it doesn't have the overt sexuality or gore of a 70's B-Movie, but neither does it achieve the stylistic, indie feel of cult classics like the Hunger. It seems to be trying for a blend of both, but fails to manage either successfully.

It's expected that plot and dialogue are going to be weak in a vampire flick, but this needs to made up for with either exciting action or style. What action there is gets bogged down by excruciatingly slow pacing, and an overload of talking. I believe they were trying to go for indie clever with the dialogue but it just comes across as dull. The visuals and imagery are nice, but not memorable. The mistake they make here is not adding the contrasting element of horrific to the dreamlike, erotic sequences so we end up with a lot of bland pretty.

I give it a 3 for the acting and for potential, but as lenient as I am when it comes to bad vampire movies, I can't give The Last Sect a good grade. The movie ends up stuck in a no man's land, neither intellectual nor gratuitous and instead, much I hate to say it, only manages to be boring.