La Saint-Valentin

I was the classic husband dragged to see this on Valentine's Day weekend as a goodwill gesture. It was every bit as bad as could be possibly imagined. Half of Hollywood's A List star as vacuous stereotypes, moronically obsessed with the holiday in question. This despite the fact they are all living millionaire lifestyles, with perfect tans and the whitest of teeth. It's Love Actually, without a sense of humour or any depth whatsoever. No- one and nothing is remotely realistic - every storyline has a trite and convenient resolution and none is convincing or interesting. There is a perfect and unlikely ratio of ethnicities and sexualities. The sex trade is entirely trivialised and sanitised. No-one stays upset about relationship breakdowns for more than one scene. People break into spontaneous dance sequences in which everyone knows the pre-rehearsed moves but the film doesn't have the conviction to show it for more than 3 seconds... Just utter pointless and patronising bilge...

I wasn't sure what to expect from this film, but I watched it anyway, because I like a lot of the people in the cast. My overall thoughts on Valentine's Day was that it wasn't terrible but it was very uneven and I do have to agree with anyone who says Love Actually did it better, it did.

Starting off with Valentine's Day, it does have a great cast. Jennifer Garner and Anne Hathaway especially are very charming, and I liked the little boy who had a crush on Garner. It was also really nice to see Hector Elizondo and Shirley McLaine again, same with Patrick Dempsey and I also thought Taylor Swift was delightfully ditzy in her debut. I didn't mind Julia Roberts either, however the only ones I didn't like so much were Jessica Alba, who doesn't have that much to do and Taylor Lautner who was rather bland, and it seemed ironic that his character didn't want to take his shirt off, when in New Moon(horrible film by the way) Lautner spends most of the time with it off. Asides from the cast, Valentine's Day was nicely filmed and had a lovely soundtrack. And I thought several of the stories worked, especially Garner's.

However, I wasn't completely sure about the phone sex idea and Eric Dane's story is painfully underdeveloped. The script also has its weak spots with nothing really sticking out in the mind, in fact there were only a few amusing moments as the film is more bittersweet than funny, particularly the one in the restaurant with the conversation about the pig's meal. The film also drags badly, while the direction isn't quite as focused as it would have liked.

Overall, it isn't terrible, but it is very uneven. Worth seeing once or twice, but it isn't a movie for me that is to watch every day of the week. 6/10 Bethany Cox

Oh dear, oh dear. This 2010 effort by the Americans to emulate the formula and the success of the British 2003 "Love Actually" produces a confused and limp offering. It must have looked such a great idea when pitched to the studio: a huge cast of stars, multiple story lines with cross connections, different takes on romance, lots of songs about love, and - even better than the Anglo film they would claim - Los Angeles (instead of London) and Valentine's Day (instead of Christmas).

But it just doesn't work and only underlines how subtle and clever was the original version. There are just too many relationships going on with too much confusion in the tales and, above all, a really weak and saccharine script from Katherine Fugate.

The best performance comes from Anne Hathaway but, if you just want to spot the stars, there's plenty on show including Ashton Kutcher and Jamie Foxx, Julia Roberts and Jennifer Gardner, Hector Elizondo and Shirley MacLaine. That's right, someone for guys and gals, young and old, white and ethnic, straight and gay. Except for a couple of nice little twists at the end, it is all so formulaic and predictable - and a little moralistic.

In the Los Angeles area, a multitude of people (all played by big names) have their lives intersect on Valentine's Day. A soldier, a football player, high school kids, a teacher, a florist and a doctor... among others. From daybreak to sundown, we follow each of them on their misadventures.

This film is getting trashed in the reviews with critics taking a collective dump on this film's face. But, you know what, I loved it. A film from the director of "Beaches" and "Pretty Woman" (Garry Marshall), with Julia Roberts and Ashton Kutcher... it should be crap. Especially since it's a romantic comedy. But this one is legitimately funny, and both Kutcher and Roberts give great performances. Even Topher Grace gives his best job yet.

You have to understand that this film is a romantic comedy, and as such isn't going to be as deep as other films. But it's very sweet, and well-written. It has been compared (rightly) to "Love Actually", but this is a strong film on its own. The way all the plots criss-cross and end up paying off so perfectly, it recalls the glory years of the 1980s, where so much could happen in one day. And there's a dance sequence towards the end! Taylor Swift has received a lot of criticism for her acting in this one. And I'm not a fan of Swift, but I have to defend her. She was playing a dumb blond and came across as a dumb blond. Some of her scenes were the funniest in the picture. If people missed that, they missed a lot. Is she a bad actress? Maybe. I don't know... but I do know she worked out well here and left a memorable impression.

Ebert, among others, slammed this film, and went so far as to say if your date likes this film, don't continue dating them. Boy, do I strongly disagree. The theater seemed to enjoy this on, and I cannot blame any girl (or guy) for thinking this a fun film. Sure, it's not high art... but it's fun and fluffy in the best way.

Throw a bunch of famous actors in and you'll get a great movie right? Wrong.

Director: I want big names in my movie. Assistant: Which ones? Director: Yes.