A Hard Place

Yeah one more of those movies that uses friends network to upvote the movie and write a good review so unsuspecting victims would buy DVDs so the team would make at least some profit. I will be short and sincere. It is one of those movies that makes even time spent on toilet seat is more fun and everything about it, the story, acting, qality of production feels like a damage for ones intelligence and general wellbeing. Such movies really feels like the entire team which was involved into making this movie is either mentally sick, heavily drugged or both. And not in a good way like some good psychedelic music from 60s or some good psychedelic movie like those from David Lynch. Just the opposite and like wrote before a general damage to your wellbeing. Problem is that such movies are now spreading like a mushrooms after the rain - Lets make movie for thousand dollars, let us record it with good quality phones and let us invite various people we meet on the street. And then let as make as much account as possible and make sure to involve all our friends to write positive reviews and click a high ratings. Of course the value of such movies are not above 2 and you can catch them in act either by watching the trailer or by very low ratings number.(usually below 1k). In this way you know that high ratings are made by movie team and their friends 90%.

I admit that sometimes I will search out a bad movie with the intention of finding a new guilty pleasure. I saw this on Tubi and it sounded odd enough to possibly be one. Boy was I wrong. This is just awful. From the bad country accents of the horrible actors, the laughable fake smoke from the guns, the awkward shots of the old fat guy who never speaks ( who also for some reason wears shoe polish under his eyes???), the stilted dialogue, it's just all around terrible. Attempts at random humor fall flat (the terribly delivered "what in the whatever state we're in chainsaw massacre" and "what in the horror movie" spoken by the same godawful actor), and the ill fitting wig of Lynn Lowry that looks like it's about to slide off at any second are just as awful. It's also a bad sign that the worst actor is the one who never speaks a line, just gives hilariously bad attempts at intimidating looks from his shoe polish streaked eyes. Even the usually dependable Felissa Rose is terrible in this. And what was with the weird sex education film that went on forever and was ultra cringeworthy? Were these friends of the writer/director? Just awkward and weird. The only positives are the creative lighting and some on the camerawork. Just please skip this and thank me later. PS: you want to know how the rating is so high on this? Click on the reviewer names and look at their rating history. Notice any patterns? Yeah, it's either their first review or they're all for projects they themselves are connected to.

I very rarely take time to review a movie. As the only other honest reviewer said, everyone in the cast must have rated this stinker 8+ I generally like a good B movie, or campy one..not this one. Sorry to be a downer.

Cinematography and location are good. The dialog & actors are cheesy. The premise is ok, just no one can salvage it.

Gory enough...if you can stomach the very poor dialogue. Watch the preview...if you like what you see, by all means, watch it..if not, time to move on to something with a bit more polish and class. This one just does not check many good boxes.

If it's meant to be bad, they succeeded...

It's my understanding that this film started out in crowdfunding. Many crowdfunded films are simply unwatchable on account of the bad acting and low production value. This movie is quite different. With a standout performance from Felissa Rose (along with Thomsen, Bryant, Undercuffler, and some fresh-faced hunks) leading the charge, the remaining characters fall in line to deliver a comedic thrill ride. There are seriously several laugh out loud moments in the middle of the carnage which is truly refreshing as is the original concept. I expect more good things to come from writer/director J. Horton!

This was a mid movie. A lot of bland parts, mixed with some fun parts. That's only minus 2 stars. Minus 3 more stars though because you can always tell when a bunch of halfwit northerners made a movie. Their idea of how deep mountain Southerners speak is so blatantly off it's astounding. Yankees really are the worst sometimes.