Letters to Satan Claus

I can't believe I just sat thru 90 minutes of this movie. 90 minutes of my life I will never get back. Why does SyFy bother with Christmas movies like this. Toys of Terror was a Christmas horror for children. And this one, as another reviewer here pointed out, is a spoof for teenagers. Was it supposed to be funny? Clearly comedy is not syfy's strongest genre. Why can't they stick to what they do best? Now, if they produced, for example, 'A Dark Matter Christmas' or 'Christmas with the Killjoys', or maybe even 'A Z Nation Christmas', I am sure they would get it right, plus most of us fans of the network would be keen to watch! It doesn't matter how good the acting is; it doesn't matter if the lead had a 'Bad Santa' or a 'Bad Moms' performance, if the movie is bad, it is not worth watching.

A silly parody of the Christmas romantic comedy genre with more meet-cutes and story morals than you can count. It's not as over the top as many of the Syfy films, but it has a lot of laughs and is quite joyful. It is to Hallmark what Sharknado was to Jaws.

As other reviewers have pointed out, this is a horror spoof of the (Hallmark, Lifetime, UPtv, ION Television, and others) Christmas (romance) genre. It also draws heavily from the Krampus folklore (and the dozen or so Krampus-based movies), a horned animal-like figure that scares children who have misbehaved at Christmas (the opposite of Saint Nicholas). At the center of the movie is Holly Frost (played by Karen Knox), a well-known TV news reporter who has a very cynical view of life, especially of Christmas. She returns to her hometown, after many years, where she falls in love while facing off Satan, who she accidentally wrote to as a child by misspelling her letter to Santa. Going into this one, I had low expectations, as the spoof genre, in general, doesn't produce many good films, unless you are a teenage boy, which seems to be the demographic this genre of film appeals to. This movie is no different. As a comedy, I thought it wasn't very good, as I did not laugh once during the movie, not even a chuckle. The closes I came to laughing was during the angel cookie scene, which I did enjoy watching. It is a pity they did not develop it a bit more (I also liked the Snowman's eyes). There was some potential in this movie around the horror angle. That said, the acting, though silly (as another reviewer put it), was pretty good, overall. I thought Knox had a very strong performance. She had a 'Bad Santa' vibe to her portrayal of Holly, which worked well on screen, I thought. The supporting cast too had a solid performance. It was a bit ironic having Michael Xavier (as Sheriff Noel) in the movie, as he has starred in two Christmas movies this season: Hallmark's Christmas Comes Twice and Lifetime's Christmas on Wheels. They should have used this in the film, as it is a spoof of these types of movies, of course. However, given viewer demographics (verses, e.g., those of Hallmark movies), I suspect not many people watching this movie would have picked up on it (as they would not have seen the above-mentioned movies). Although there is some good acting (and the critique behind the satire makes sense), all in all, this parody is not very funny (silly yes, but funny no).

Title of review pretty much says it all. This is a witty, well written and surprisingly well acted (for a SCI-FY channel movie), spoof of those sappy Christmas movies where the cynical big city gal returns to her rural home-town and finds both her Christmas spirit and true love. But now add a bonkers over-the-top Christmas town, Satan Clause, and a half-dozen grisly Christmas-themed murders and you have a recipe for fun.

I live in a famously over-the-top Christmas town so I really identified with the Ho Ho Hoedown and all the other non-stop holiday events in the movie. And the Hallmark spoof was right on--every man the heroine meets is a ruggedly handsome widower with a daughter, and they even find a way to throw in a prince. I also got a kick out of how there was exactly one African-America family and exactly one Jewish family in town--and that people try to 'vandalize' the Jewish family's house by putting Christmas lights on it. Perhaps a little longer than it needed to be, but a fun way to kill an afternoon.

The premise signals not to take the movie serious so lower your expectations from the outset. The movie does deliver on some tidbits of pitch dark humor and fun gory surprises. If you are a person who laughs at inappropriate jokes then you will find a few sensible chuckles scattered about the film. I have two chief complaints: 1. It did not go far enough with the dark humor. It felt like they were tempering the laughs for fear of being too offensive. They sandwhich the dark bits between light-hearted 'human' momments. This hurts the pacing and is unnecessary. Anyone who signs on for the premise of a Santa letter to Satan wants to be taken on a full blown offensive humor ride. Spare us the feel good coddling. We don't need it. 2. Christmas movies traditionally have a happy, hopeful, ending filled with redemption, and this movie is no exception, but it feels like wimping out here. I didn't want to smile at the conclusion. I wanted a sick punchline to make me groan out a wicked laugh, so I feel cheated in that sense. Bottom line: Fun premise with a few fun momments. Worth a watch, but falls short of its dark promise.