Private Property

The film had some great visuals and an overall, style. I enjoyed the story structure. It felt very noir. Even Shiloh's performance was quite entertaining. He was both charming, yet creepy. His character's back story was also interesting. But the film could've dove in a bit more on his back story. Perhaps, I was just invested to know more of his motives.

The only issue I had was the lead (Ashley Benson). She was not convincing in her role; it felt very forced. In most of the films I've seen her in, she always came off exhausted. To me, she was just there - acting. The film should've cast a stronger leading lady. She should've taken acting lessons.

It was comically awful.

• The editing was terrible. In an 80-minute movie, we were treated to long stretches of scenes like the protagonist taking out her trash, making the movie feel like the run time was far longer. It was like an. Editing 101 submission.

• I paused to check the year this film was made because (and not in a good retro way), it looked like it was made in the early 90s at some points.

• The sound was poorly done, making it hard to hear dialogue at points.

• Jay Pharoah's character was a joke. Going back to bad directing/editing: one of the longer stretches of his character on screen has his back facing the camera. He's absent for a large part of the movie and his character just comes off as filler. Terrible way to use your star actor.

• The whole story was a mess. The ending was a mess and rushed. Certain character motivations were unclear or not addressed. So when the ending came, it fell completely flat. A certain character reappears and I laughed because he was so disinterested in everything until that point.

It was like a lifetime movie (though that's an insult to many LT movies). Not an entertaining one and not well done even for their standards. A boring, dated (but new), poorly directed and edited Lifetime movie.

The actors did their best but you could tell they were without proper direction. The lead woman's abilities were greater than the film, for sure. But she was working with nothing.

I put this Hulu flick on at 1 in the afternoon while doing laundry and packing for an upcoming work trip. All I could think of while watching thus movie was Instagram "stories". I had just watched Shiloh Hernandez (even his name is Instagrammable!) in a movie on Tubi with the actress from Gone Girl and I Care A Lot. Like this, it too was a bad flick but that actress (I don't know her name, she never became an A-lister) is so great she elevates her films if given enough creative license to do her thing. I cannot believe how difficult it is to try and come up with six hundred characters to fill the gap. Cringe & thirsty.

I didn't realize this was a remake, so haven't seen the original (but I'd bet my bottom dollar it's superior to this piece of crap). I don't review many movies but I had to figure out what my password was just to log on to rate this one. I'm fairly easy to please as far as movies are concerned, but this was just bad. Bad plot, bad acting, bad writing. It felt like such a mess, it would not surprise me if I found out this was the final project for a high school film class. It was so laughably cringy and ridiculous that I just couldn't stop watching because I had to find out if it would end up having any redeeming value at all. Spoiler alert: it doesn't.

None have captured the spirit of how bad a film can be like this one. I literally couldn't NOt Watch because I am shocked this was made. 0/10 would never recommend not even to my worst enemy. Guantanomo Bay banned this movie because it was too evil to put on repeat.