Bullet Train Down

When I saw the title of this 2022 movie, I must admit that my thoughts were immediately 'okay, The Asylum is now cashing in on the Bullet Train movie'. Yet, I still opted to give "Bullet Train Down" a chance, on the account of it being a movie that I hadn't seen, nor actually ever heard about prior to sitting down to watch.

And my initial thoughts were true, because this movie was The Asylum cashing in on the Brad Pitt movie "Bullet Train", except they also rip off "Speed". Yeah, the storyline in "Bullet Train Down" is a blantant rip off of the old Keanu Reeves movie "Speed", except this story takes place on a bullet train and not on a bus. So much for originality from writer Alex Heerman, huh?

While The Asylum definitely have a lot of dubious movies to their name, then I will honestly say that "Bullet Train Down" wasn't all that bad. Cheesy and corny, sure, but it was watchable and entertaining enough for the cheese that it was. Not exactly a great movie, mind you.

The acting performances in the movie were somewhat all over the place. Some of the actors and actresses couldn't muster a performance that would fool a blind man, while others were doing all the heavy lifting and carrying the movie almost singlehandedly. Rashod Freelove definitely carried the movie with his performance, alongside with Xander Bailey. Tom Sizemore was the only familiar face for me on the cast list, but his acting in this movie was just laughably bad and wooden.

Visually then "Bullet Train Down" was actually an okay movie, especially taking into consideration some of the numerous older movies that The Asylum have been churning out. Sure, you're not in for a CGI spectacle here, but the CGI effects worked well enough in favor of the movie. However, it should be noted that you will not buy into believing that the movie ever took place inside a train, because the sets were just so horribly amateurish and looked like they cleared out someone's living room and built up what was supposed to be the cabin of a bullet train. It just didn't fool anyone.

"Bullet Train Down" is the type of movie that you will watch once, then shelf it, forget about and never bring it out to see the light of day ever again.

My rating of director Brian Novak's 2022 movie "Bullet Train Down" lands on a four out of ten stars.

Ok I was expecting a bad movie and I was not disappointed. This movie is great for cleaning your house or noise in the background to make doing your taxes interesting. You don't even need to rewind if you miss something while going to check your mail. Honestly it felt like a student film or something the sci-fi channel would have aired in their early days. The budget felt like someone used a credit card to fund this. Way too much gel color on the lighting. Also who gets this excited about a train doing 200 mph it's the 21st century. I do have one other observation. I feel like no one really let Tom know you can see the withdrawal symptoms and sweating. He's so pale. Made me feel sad because this was obviously his last film and though he had issues he was a formidable actor.

Okay so to start, why is the flight sim joystick controlling the bullet train? Second, cgi is TERRIBLE. Third, please just.. don't watch this. And also, why is the acting so just.. mashed together? The asylum's movies are so bad, like meteor moon and tarantulava, but this. THIS is the worst. And why are the sets so cheap? Yet they make it like a blockbuster. So if you were about to hit play on your tv to watch this, I suggest not. It's a waste of time and money. Really, this movie is the bottom of the bargain bin. AND THERES MORE. The landscaping is so off from where it's meant to take place. Anyways, bye.

Asylums newest movie is a parody of the title with brad pitt, with elements of speed mixed in. Ill say one thing. The quality is actually pretty good, the train interior and some of the camera shots are shot quite nicely. Acting was ok and the cgi stills has elements that made me laugh. The problem I found with this film though really was just the story. I just didn't find it as interesting as the creature ones. But having said that its still and interesting watch with some surprises along the way.

This is one of the stupidest movies i've ever seen. The acting was horrible, and fake and ai was used for all of the outside footage. And it wasn't even good AI, it was bad AI, a child could've have created that! I can't even believe I sat through the whole movie. The main reason I did was just to see how much more stupid it was going to get, and it didn't disappoint me. Not only was the acting terrible, but you never saw a wide angled shot inside the train! Every shot inside the train was close up, in the face of the actor and you never saw the entire train car or an aisle in the train, the most you saw was two, maybe three seats, and all of the shots were close up. I was annoyed by that. I definitely would not watch this movie. It would be a waste of your time.